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ON LAST NIGHT'S SHOW WE TALKED ABOUT THE CLIMATE SUMMIT IN
PARIS AND HOW IMPORTANT IT IS TO THE FUTURE OF MAN KIND.
BUT NOW I KNOW WE SHOULD HAVE BEEN TALKING ABOUT SOMETHING
MUCH MORE DANGEROUS.
>> WE ARE TALKING ABOUT THE EXISTENTIAL THREAT TO MAN KIND
FROM GLOBAL WARMING.
YOU KNOW, GRADUALLY IN THE FUTURE, WHAT ABOUT WHAT IS
HAPPENING RIGHT NOW.
WHAT ABOUT WHEN YOU SAW THOSE AMAZON DRONES DELIVERING THE
PROTOTYPES, DELIVERING GOODS TO PEOPLE'S HOMES.
WHAT HAPPENS WHEN ISIS GETS A DRONE AND PUTS A BOMB ON IT AND
FLIES IT SOME PLACE.
>> Trevor: YEAH, YEAH. WHY TALK ABOUT THE REAL THING THAT
COULD GRADUALLY DESTROY CIVILIZATION OVER TIME WHEN WE
COULD BE TALKING ABOUT THE MORE IMMEDIATE THING THAT I'M MAKING
UP RIGHT NOW.
I'M SORRY, ISIS BOMBS ON AMAZON DRONES?
OH, AND EVEN WORSE WHAT IF ISIS GETS THEIR HANDS ON AN AMAZON
PRIME ACCOUNT. OH, IT WILL BE FREE-TWO-DAY SHIPPING ON BOMBS
IN NEW YORK, SAME DAY.
ADD TO CART.
PEOPLE ARE RIGHT, WE SHOULD BE WORRIED ABOUT ISIS.
THEY'RE THE WORLD'S MOST FEARED TERRORISTS AND EVEN WORSE THEY
HAVE RUINED THE REPUTATION OF LEMON ISIS WHOSE ONLY GOAL IS TO
SPREAD FROSTY TART DESSERTS ACROSS THE MIDDLE EASTED.
AND FOR WHAT IT'S WORTH, ISIS IS GETTING PLENTY OF NEW ATTENTION.
>> MORE U.S. SPECIAL OPERATIONS FORCES ARE NOW HEADING TO IRAQ
AND TO SYRIA.
>> IN FULL COORDINATION IN THE GOVERNMENT OF IRAQ WE'RE
DEPLOYING AN SPECIALIZED EXPEDITIONARY TARGETING FORCE TO
ASSIST IRAQI AND KURDISH PESHMERGA FORCES AND PUT EVEN
MORE PRESSURE ON ISIL.
>> Trevor: YES, THE U.S. IS GOING AFTER ISIS IN FULL
COORDINATION WITH THE GOVERNMENT OF IRAQ.
THAT'S KIND OF KEY HERE.
YOU CAN'T REMOVE A TOXIC ELEMENT WITHOUT THE FULL COOPERATION OF
THE BODY IT'S INFECTING.
ISN'T THAT RIGHT, MY APPENDIX!
YOU WERE THE ISIS OF MY DIE GUESS TIFF SYSTEM.
I WILL TELL YOU WHAT I LIKE ABOUT THIS PLAN.
FULL COORDINATION WITH THE GOVERNMENT OF IRAQ.
THAT SEEMS LIKE THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THE WHOLE
OPERATION BECAUSE WITHOUT THAT, I DON'T THINK I'D DO THIS.
>> IRAQ PRIME MINISTER HAIDER AL ABADI SAID HIS FORCES WERE
CAPABLE OF DEFEATING ISIS WITHOUT THE HELP OF FOREIGN
COMBAT TROOPS.
>> ANY FOREIGN FORCE WHICH ENTERS IRAQ WILL BE VIEWED AS AN
INVADING FORCE.
>> Trevor: AH!
SEE, I ALWAYS KNEW THE INVASION OF IRAQ WOULD ONE DAY COME BACK
TO BITE THE U.S.
I KNEW IT, I KNEW IT.
SO IRAQ HAS DECIDED THAT THEY CAN TAKE ON ISIS BY THEMSELVES.
AND THEY'RE NOT GOING TO BE THE ONLY ONES TRYING TO BE THE ONLY
ONES.
>> ANONYMOUS, THE HACKTIVIST GROUP SHROUDED IN SECRECY,
HAS DECLARED WAR ON ISIS FOLLOWING THE ATTACKS IN PARIS.
>> THIS IS A MESSAGE TO ISIS.
YOU HAVE REACHED A LIMIT.
>> Trevor: OH, SNAP.
YOU HAVE REACHED YOUR LIMIT, ISIS.
YOUR FREE VERSION OF TERRORISM HAS EXPIRED.
IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO PAY FOR THE PRO VERSION.
COME ON, WE'RE TALKING ABOUT ISIS HERE.
HOW EFFECTIVE CAN ANONYMOUS BE.
>> MORE THAN 20,000 TWITTER ACCOUNTS BELONGING TO ISIS WERE
JUST TAKEN DOWN BY ANONYMOUS.
ISIS, WE WILL HUNT YOU, TAKE DOWN YOUR SITES, ACCOUNTS, AN
E-MAILS AND EXPOSE YOU.
>> Trevor: I HAVE A PARTICULAR SET OF SKILLS.
WE WILL HUNT YOU DOWN.
WE WILL FIND YOU.
AND WE WILL MAKE YOU-- MOM!
I'M RECORDING A MESSAGE FOR ISIS!
BRING THE POP TARTS DOWN HERE!
COME ON!
HEY, ANONYMOUS, I WAS JUST JOKE BEING THE POP TART THING.
YOU GUYS SEEM LIKE VERY NICE HACKERS, PLEASE DON'T HACK ME
AND DESTROY MY LIFE.
(LAUGHTER)
BY THE WAY, IF YOU ARE A CELEBRITY, NOW SAY GREAT TIME
TO TAKE SOME BATHROOM NUDES BECAUSE IT SEEMS LIKE ALL THE
TOP HACKERS ARE BUSY WITH THIS ISIS THING.
>> THERE'S ANOTHER TECHICALLY SOPHISTICATED GROUP FIGHTING AN
ONLINE WAR WITH ISIS.
THEY CALL THEMSELVES GHOST SECURITY GROUP.
IT'S LEADERS AN EX-ANONYMOUS MEMBER, A MAN WHO CALLS HIMSELF
DIGITA SHADOW.
>> MY ONLINE NAME IS DIGITA SHADOW.
>> Trevor: LOOK, DIGITA SHADOW. IF YOU WANT TO SCARE
ISIS, MAYBE DON'T PICK A NAME THAT LOOSELY TRANSLATES TO
SHADOW FINGERS.
>> 'TIS I, SHADOW FINGERS.
I WILL HUNT YOU DOWN LIKE A DOG AND DESTROY YOU, BONNY ISIS.
OH NO, HE'S GETTING AWAY!
JUST A LIGHTHEARTED JOKE, MR. SHADOW, SIR, I'M A HUGE FAN
OF YOUR HACKING.
YOU HOLD ALL THE POWER IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
PLEASE DON'T DOXX ME AND DESTROY MY LIFE.
NOW UNFORTUNATELY WE CAN'T ONLY DEAL WITH ISIS ONLINE.
IT'S NOT LIKE EVERY OTHER ASPECT OF OUR LIVES.
AND THANKFULLY THERE ARE PEOPLE OUT THERE OFFERING PRACTICAL
SOLUTIONS.
>> THE NATION'S LARGEST POLICE UNION IS PUSHING FOR SOME NFL
FANS TO BE ALLOWED TO CARRY CONCEALED WEAPONS IN STADIUMS.
>> THE LETTER CITED THE RECENT ATTACKS IN A SOCCER STADIUM IN
PARIS SAYING ON DUTY POLICE OFFICERS MAY NOT BE ABLE TO FIND
AND NEUTRALIZE EVERY POTENTIAL THREAT.
>> Trevor: OH, YEAH, ARMING FOOTBALL FANS.
WHO LOOKED AT A STADIUM FILLED WITH DRUNK DUDES SCREAMING AT
ATHLETES AND THINKS, YOU KNOW WHAT THESE GUYS NEED?
GUNS.
YEAH, YEAH.
YOU REALLY WANT GUNS FOR THESE EAGLE FANS WHO USE SNOW AS A
WEAPON, REALLY?
THAT'S WHAT YOU WANT?
YOU WANT THEM TO GET SNOW.
THEY USE SNOW, YOU KNOW THAT PEACEFUL SUBSTANCE, THAT ALMOST
WATER, YEAH, YEAH.
AND YOU WANT THEM TO HAVE GUNS AT GAMES NOW, THAT IS WHAT YOU
ARE SAYING?
SORRY, EAGLES FANS, THAT YOU ARE EAGLES FANS.
(LAUGHTER) (APPLAUSE)
POLICE, I GET THE SENTIMENTS.
BUT SOMETIMES THE COPS CAN'T HELP.
AN WHEN THAT HAPPENS, YOU HAVE TO TURN TO SOMEBODY ELSE FOR A
LITTLE PROTECTION.
>> ISIS HAS A BRAND NEW OPPONENT, THE NEW YORK MAFIA.
>> THE SON OF NOTORIOUS MOB FRANCESCO GAMBINO SAYS THEY
CAN PROTECT AMERICA BETTER THAN THE COPS.
>> Trevor: I LOVE THE IDEA THAT THE MOB IS GOING TO PROTECT
AMERICA FROM ISIS.
YOU CAN IMAGINE THOSE GUYS? "HEY, ISIS, YOU GOT A NICE
BURGEOING CALIPHATE HERE. WOULDN'T IT BE ASHAME IF
SOMETHING WOULD HAPPEN TO IT, CAPISCE?"
APPARENTLY THERE WAS AN ARTICLE IN "THE NEW YORK POST"
THAT CLAIMED THAT THE MAFIA CLAIMED WAR ON ISIS AND GAMBINO
WENT ON FOX TO DISCUSS IT.
>> THERE WAS AN ARTICLE ON "THE NEW YORK POST," MOST OF IT IS
BULLSHIT.
>> JUST AS A REMINDER, WE HAVE KIDS WATCHING, PLEASE WATCH THE
LANGUAGE THIS MORNING.
>> OH, YEAH, YEAH, NO PROBLEM.
>> Trevor: OH, YEAH, YEAH, THE KIDS. I CAN'T BELIEVE I [BLEEP]
OH, I'M SUCH A [BLEEP] OH, SHIT I KEEP --
HEY, MR. GAMBINO, I'M SO [BLEEP] SORRY.
OKAY, MR. GAMBINO, SO THE BIG QUESTION IS WHAT DOES THE MAFIA
HAVE TO DO WITH ISIS?
AND PLEASE MAKE IT BULLSHIT.
>> THE BIRTH OF THE MAFIA WAS THE LATE 1200.
AND TO PROTECT ITS CITIZENS AND THERE WAS AN EVIL EMPIRE JUST
LIKE ISIS, JUST LIKE ISIS.
>> Trevor: I SEE, HE'S DESCRIBING ANOTHER SPLINTER
GROUP, ITALIAN ISIS.
(LAUGHTER)
YOU SEE, THE GREAT THING IN THIS SITUATION IS THAT YOU DON'T
EVEN HAVE TO BE A PART OF AN ORGANIZATION TO MAKE A
DIFFERENCE.
ANYONE CAN STEP UP TO FIGHT ISIS NO MATTER HOW LITTLE YOU KNOW
ABOUT THEM OR HOW RACIST YOU ARE.
>> IN TEXAS OVER THE WEEKEND A GROUP OF PROTESTORS, SOME OF
THEM ARMED, LINED UP OUTSIDE A MOSQUE IN IRVING.
SOME OF THE DEMONSTRATORS HELD SIGNS READING STOP THE
ISLAMIZATION OF AMERICA.
WORSHIPERS WERE URGED TO STEER CLEAR OF THE GROUP.
>> WE ARE HERE PROTESTING SYRIAN REFUGEES COMING TO AMERICA.
PROTESTING THE ISLAMIZATION OF AMERICA.
>> Trevor: WOW.
I FEEL SO BAD FOR THESE SYRIAN REFUGEES, CAN YOU IMAGINE
FLEEING OVER 7,000 MILES TO GET AWAY FROM THIS GUY AND YOU
FINALLY MAKE IT TO AMERICA AND THE FIRST THING YOU SEE WHEN YOU
ARRIVE AT YOUR NEW MOSQUE IS THIS GUY.
THEY MUST BE A LITTLE BIT LIKE BUGS BUNNY, NO MATTER HOW FAR
THEY TRAVEL THERE IS ALWAYS AN IDIOT WITH A BIG GUN TRYING TO
HUNT THEM DOWN.