EVERYBODY.

すべての人に。

LET'S SAY HELLO TO JON BATISTE.

ジョン・バチステに挨拶しよう

HELLO, JON.

こんにちは、ジョン

>> Jon: WOOOO!

>> ジョン：WOOO!

THAT'S A BAND THERE.

そこにバンドがあるんだ

>> Stephen: IT IS.

>> スティーブンIT IS.

I HAVE AN IMPORTANT QUESTION FOR YOU, JON.

I HAVE AN IMPORTANT QUESTION FOR YOU, JON.

DO YOU HAVE FRIENDS DOWN IN GEORGIA?

DO YOU HAVE FRIENDS DOWN IN GEORGIA?

>> Jon: YES, I HAVE FRIEND IN GEORGIA, OF COURSE.

>> ジョンもちろん、GEORGIAに友達がいるんだ。

FAMILY IN GEORGIA.

FAMILY IN GEORGIA.

>> Stephen: DO YOU KNOW IF THEY'RE REGISTERED TO VOTE.

>> スティーブン投票に登録されているかどうか知っていますか？

REMEMBER, THE DEADLINE TO REGISTER TO VOTE IN THE RUNOFFS

REMEMBER, THE DEADLINE TO REGISTER TO VOTE IN THE RUNOFFS

IN JANUARY FOR THE TWO SENATE SEATS, THAT'S DECEMBER 7.

1月の上院の2議席は12月7日だ

>> Jon: RIGHT.

>>ジョン。Right.

>> Stephen: OKAY.

>> スティーブンいいわよ

>> Jon: RIGHT, DECEMBER 7 IS THE DEADLINE.

>>ジョン。右、12月7日が締め切りです。

SO GOTTA SPREAD THE WORD.

噂を広めようぜ

>> Stephen: YOU CAN REGISTER EVEN IF YOU WEREN'T REGISTERED

>> スティーブン：登録していなくても登録できます。

FOR THE GENERAL ELECTION IN NOVEMBER, RIGHT?

11月の総選挙のためにね？

>> Jon: RIGHT.

>>ジョン。Right.

>> Stephen: AND IF YOU WEREN'T OLD ENOUGH AT THE GENERAL

>> Stephen: AND IF YOU WEREN TO OLD ENOUGH AT THE GENERAL.

ELECTION.

選挙。

SO IF YOU'VE TURNED 18 BETWEEN NOVEMBER 3 AND JANUARY 5,

11月3日から1月5日までに18歳になった方は

RIGHT-- I THINK THAT'S THE ELECTION.

RIGHT-- I THINK THAT'S THE ELECTION.

BOOM.

ブーム

YOU'RE IN.

君がいる

>> Jon: BIRTHDAY PRESENT.

>> Jon: BIRTHDAY PRESENT.

THERE IT IS.

そこにある

>> Stephen: YOU CAN REQUEST A BALLOT BY MAIL.

>> スティーブン：あなたは郵便で投票用紙を要求することができます。

AGAIN, IT'S JANUARY 5.

また1月5日だ

FOR MORE INFORMATION TO EVERYBODY OUT THERE-- AND PLEASE

そこにいるすべての人へのより多くの情報を得るために - そして、お願いします。

TELL YOUR FRIENDS IN GEORGIA, JON, GO TO BETTERED

ジョージア州の友人に伝えてくれ、ジョン、BETTEREDに行ってくれ。

KNOWABALLOT.COM/GA, FOR ALL THE RESOURCES YOU NEED AND A

KNOWABALLOT.COM/GA, FOR ALL THE RESOURCES YOU NEED AND A

STEP-BY-STEP VIDEO BY ME ON HOW TO REGISTER TO VOTE.

投票するために登録する方法についての私によるステップバイステップのビデオ。

IT'S FREE.

ITは無料です。

YOU'RE LOSING MONEY IF YOU DON'T GO.

行かないと損をするぞ

>> Jon: YOU CAN DO IT RIGHT NOW.

>> ジョン今すぐにでもできる

>> Stephen: JON, YOU HAVE ANY RUNOFF MUSIC, SOMETHING FOR A

>> スティーブン：ジョン、何かランオフ・ミュージックを持っていますか？

RUNOFF?

ランオフ？

♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪

♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪

>> Stephen: JON BATISTE, EVERYBODY.

>> スティーブンジョン・バティステ、エブリバディ

THANK YOU, JON.

THANK YOU, JON.

>> Jon: ♪ OH, GEORGIA ♪

>> >> ジョン: ♪ OH, GEORGIA ♪

>> Stephen: CHILDREN: THEY'RE LIKE ADULTS, BUT NOT AS

>> スティーブン大人と同じではなく、大人と同じように

EDUCATED.

EDUCATED.

AND THEY CERTAINLY DON'T TALK IN PERFECT WORD CHOICES LIKE WE CAN

そして、彼らは確かに私たちができるように完璧な言葉の選択で話すことはありません。

DO IT.

OJ IT.

AND WITH KIDS SPENDING MORE TIME AT HOME RIGHT NOW, PARENTS ARE

AND WITH KIDS SPENDING MORE TIME AT HOME RIGHT NOW, PARENTS ARE

REALIZING THEY ASK A LOT OF QUESTIONS.

REALIZING THEY ASK A LOT OF QUESTIONS.

SO I'VE BEEN PROVIDING A SERVICE WHERE I ANSWER REAL QUESTIONS

SO I'VE BEEN PROVIDING A SERVICE WHERE I ANSWER REAL QUESTIONS

FROM REAL KIDS, SENT IN BY REAL PARENTS WHO ARE REAL TIRED.

本物の子供たちから、本当の親が送ってきたんです。

SO, PARENTS, FEEL FREE TO TAKE A BREAK AND LEAVE YOUR CHILDREN IN

だから、親たちは、自由に休憩を取って、子供たちを残してください

FRONT OF THE TV.

テレビの前で

BECAUSE IT'S TIME ONCE AGAIN FOR >> "STEPHEN TAKES YOUR KIDS!"

BECAUSE IT'S TIME ONCE AGAIN FOR >> "STEPHEN TAKES YOUR KIDS!"

>> Stephen: I AM NO LONGER ASKING YOU, I AM TELLING YOU: WE

>> スティーブン：私はもうあなたに尋ねているのではなく、私はあなたに言っている：私たち。

ARE CHANGING THAT NAME!

ARE CHANGING THAT NAME!

HI, KIDS.

ハイ、子供たち

I'M STEPHEN, AND I'LL BE YOUR TEACHER TODAY.

I'M STEPHEN, AND I'LL BE YOUR TEACHER TODAY.

AND I'M HERE TO ANSWER QUESTIONS, SINCE MY MIND IS FULL

AND I'M HERE TO ANSWER QUESTIONS, SINCE MY MIND IS FULL

OF ALL THE CORRECT ANSWERS.

OF ALL THE CORRECT ANSWERS.

HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED THAT I NEVER ASK A QUESTION?

HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED THAT I NEVER ASK A QUESTION?

EXACTLY.

まさにその通り

LET'S GET STARTED.

LET'S GET STARTED.

FIRST QUESTION!

FIRST QUESTION!

>> DOES A CHICKEN TALK TO A CHICKEN?

>> ニワトリはニワトリと会話するのか？

>> Stephen: YES, IT CAN, UNLESS THE SECOND CHICKEN FORGOT THE

>> スティーブン：はい、それはできます、2番目の鶏が忘れていない限り、それはできます。

FIRST CHICKEN'S BIRTHDAY.

FIRST CHICKEN'S BIRTHDAY.

THEN THEY MAY NOT TALK FOR MONTHS.

何ヶ月も喋らないかもしれない

NEXT QUESTION!

NEXT QUESTION!

>> WHAT HAPPENS IF YOGURT GOES IN YOUR-- UM-- NOSE?

>> WHAT HAPPENS IF YOGURT GOES IN YOUR-- UM-- NOSE?

>> Stephen: OKAY, THIS DOES NOT SEEM LIKE A HYPOTHETICAL.

>> スティーブンこれは仮説には見えないな

BUT DON'T PANIC-- I'M GOING TO TALK YOU THROUGH THIS.

でも、パニックにならないで...私が話をするから。

YOU GOT TWO OPTIONS: ONE, GO GET A TISSUE, AND BLOW IT OUT.

選択肢は２つ1つ目は 牙を手に入れて 吹き出す

TWO, ADD SOME BLENDED FRUIT AND PROTEIN POWDER.

2、果物とタンパク質パウダーを混ぜたものを追加します。

THEN YOU DON'T HAVE YOGURT UP YOUR NOSE.

THEN YOU DON'T HAVE YOGURT UP YOUR NOSE.

YOU'RE JUST MAKING A DELICIOUS NASAL SMOOTHIE.

美味しい鼻のスムージーを 作っているだけだよ

NEXT QUESTION.

NEXT QUESTION.

>> IF THERE WAS ONE CHARACTER IN THE ENTIRE "LORD OF THE RINGS"

>> IF THERE WAS ONE CHARACTER IN THE ENTIRE "LORD OF THE RINGS"

STORY LINE THAT COULD BE AN AVOCADO, WHICH ONE DO YOU THINK

STORY LINE THAT COULD BE AN AVOCADO, WHICH ONE DO YOU THINK

COULD BE THE AVOCADO?" >> Stephen: WOW.

"アボカドになるのか？">> スティーブンうわー。

THAT IS AN INCREDIBLE QUESTION.

THAT IS AN INCREDIBLE QUESTION.

FIRST OF ALL, CONGRATULATIONS ON ASKING ME PERHAPS THE ONLY

まず第一に、唯一の私に尋ねてくれたことに感謝します。

QUESTION ABOUT "THE LORD OF THE RINGS" THAT I'VE NEVER BEEN

QUESTION ABOUT "THE LORD OF THE RINGS" THAT I'VE NEVER BEEN

ASKED BEFORE.

ASKED BEFORE.

I HAVE TO GIVE THIS SOME THOUGHT.

I HAVE TO GIVE THIS SOME THOUGHT.

SAM.

ＳＡＭだ

SAM IS THE AVOCADO.

SAM IS THE AVOCADO.

NEXT?

NEXT?

>> I'M CONFUSED.

>> 混乱しています。

WHICH LAMBORGHINI SHOULD I PICK FOR MY SCHOOL PROJECT, A

WHICH LAMBORGHINI SHOULD I PICK FOR MY SCHOOL PROJECT, A

CENTENARIO OR THE PERFORMANTE?" >> Stephen: MAHESH, I GOTTA SAY,

CENTENARIO OR THE PERFORMANTE?>> Stephen: MAHESH, I GOTTA SAY.

I'M CONFUSED, TOO.

私も混乱している。

I MEAN, CENTANARIO OR PERFORMANTE?

センテナリオかペルフォルマンテか？

ARE THOSE REALLY THE ONLY TWO CHOICES, MAHESH?

これは本当に2つの選択肢しかないのか、マエシュ？

I MEAN, SURE, THE REAR-WHEEL STEERING AND THE INCREASED

後輪操舵と増加した

DOWN-FORCE MAKE THE CENTENARIO A TECHNICAL MARVEL AND MOVING

DOWN-FORCE MAKE THE CENTENARIO A TECHNICAL MARVEL AND MOVING

TRIBUTE TO THE ANNIVERSARY OF FERRUCCIO LAMBORGHINI'S BIRTH,

TRIBUTE TO THE ANNIVERSARY OF FERRUCCIO LAMBORGHINI'S BIRTH,

BUT EVERYONE KNOWS IT'S ESSENTIALLY JUST A MODIFIED

しかし、誰もが知っているように、それは本質的にただの改造されたものです。

AVENTADOR.

アベンタドール

AND, YES, THE PERFORMANTE IS A BEAUTIFUL PIECE OF ENGINEERING

そして、そう、「パフォーマンス」は美しいエンジニアリングの塊なのです。

FROM THE CARBON FIBRE FRONT BUMPER TO THE FORGED COMPOSITE

FROM THE CARBON FIBRE FRONT BUMPER TO THE FORGED COMPOSITE

REAR SPOILER.

REAR SPOILER。

BUT HAVE YOU EVEN CONSIDERED THE CLASSIC COUNTACH LP-400?

BUT HAVE YOU EVEN CONSIDERED THE CLASSIC COUNTACH LP-400?

I'M TALKING ABOUT THE INITIAL MODEL WITH THE NARROW TIRES AND

私が話しているのは、ナロータイヤの初期型と

LOW DRAG COEFFICIENT.

低ドラグ係数。

IT MAY NOT HAVE THE PERFORMANCE CAPABILITY OF NEWER MODELS, BUT

IT MAY NOT HAVE THE PERFORMANCE CAPABILITY OF NEWER MODELS, BUT

THE ICONIC SCISSOR DOORS AND THE STRIKING ALLOY BODY WORK

アイコニックなシザードアと衝撃的なアロイのボディワーク

HELPED IT PIONEER THE ANGLED ITALIAN WEDGE DESIGN THAT WOULD

斜めのイタリアンウェッジデザインの先駆者となりました。

GO ON TO BECOME A LAMBORGHINI SIGNATURE.

GO ON TO BECOME A LAMBORGHINI SIGNATURE.

BUT IT'S YOUR SCHOOL PROJECT.

BUT IT'S YOUR SCHOOL PROJECT.

DO WHATEVER YOU WANT.

DO WHATEVER YOU WANT.

NEXT QUESTION.

NEXT QUESTION.

>> WHY DO DINOSAURS STOMP ALL DAY AND NIGHT?

>> WHY DO DINOSAURS STOMP ALL DAY AND NIGHT?

>> Stephen: THAT'S AN IMPORTANT QUESTION.

>> スティーブンそれは重要な質問です。

THANK YOU.

THANK YOU.

THERE'S A LOT TO UNPACK THERE.

THERE'S A LOT TO UNPACK THERE.

THERE'S TWO REASONS THEY DO THIS, REALLY.

これには2つの理由がある 本当に

DINOSAURS STOMP ALL DAY BECAUSE THEY'RE STILL UPSET THAT COMET

DINOSAURS STOMP ALL DAY BECAUSE THEY'RE STILL UPSET THAT COMET

WIPED OUT ALL OF THEIR FRIENDS.

WIPED OUT ALL OF THEIR FRIENDS.

AND DINOSAURS STOMP ALL NIGHT BECAUSE THEIR DOWNSTAIRS

AND DINOSAURS STOMP ALL NIGHT BECAUSE THEIR DOWNSTAIRS

NEIGHBOR IRV IS PLAYING THE MUSIC TOO LOUD, AND THEY HAVE TO

近所のIRVは大音量で音楽を再生しているので、彼らはしなければならない。

BE ON A ZOOM CALL FIRST THING IN THE MORNING.

BE ON A ZOOM CALL FIRST THING IN THE MORNING.

WE ALL LIKE STEELY DAN, IRV, BUT TURN DOWN THE "AJA."

WE ALL LIKE STEELY DAN, IRV, BUT TURN DOWN THE "AJA."

NEXT QUESTION.

NEXT QUESTION.

>> MY QUESTION IS, CAN YOU CATCH A CLOUD?

>> MY QUESTION IS, CAN YOU CATCH A CLOUD?

>> Stephen: THAT'S A DEEP QUESTION, JAMES.

>> スティーブン深い質問だな、ジェームス

TRYING TO THROW YOUR ARMS AROUND A CLOUD WOULD BE LIKE TRYING TO

雲の周りに腕を回そうとしているのと同じ

CATCH A MOMENT IN TIME.

時間の中の瞬間をキャッチする。

RATHER THAN CAUGHT, IT IS TO BE OBSERVED LIKE ALL THE MOMENTS

RATHER THAN CAUGHT, IT IS TO BE OBSERVED LIKE ALL THE MOMENTS

THAT FLOAT ACROSS THE SKY OF OUR LIVES.

私たちの生活の空に浮かぶもの。

WE CANNOT KEEP THEM, AND THAT VERY FACT GIVES THEM A TRAGIC

私たちは彼らを維持することはできませんし、その非常に事実は彼らに悲劇を与えます。

BEAUTY.

BEAUTY.

WE ARE HERE BUT ONCE, SO SEEK NOT TO HOLD WHAT CANNOT BE HELD,

私たちは一度だけここにいるので、保持することができないものを保持しないようにしてください。

JAMES, ONLY BE PRESENT TO EXPERIENCE IT.

ジェイムズ、体験するためだけに出席してください。

EITHER THAT OR ASK YOUR PARENTS TO SPRING FOR STEPHEN COLBERT'S

それか 親に頼んで スティーブン・コルバートのために 春を迎えようとするか

CLOUD VACUUM, WHICH RETAILS ON OUR WEBSITE FOR ONLY $349.99.

クラウドバキューム、当サイトでは349.99ドルで販売しています。

STEPHEN COLBERT'S CLOUD VACUUM: WE PROMISE IT'S GONNA SUCK!

STEPHEN COLBERT'S CLOUD VACUUM: WE PROMISE IT'S GONNA SUCK!

NEXT QUESTION.

NEXT QUESTION.

>> HOW DOES SANTA GET THE PRESENTS TO ALL OF THE KIDS IN

>> HOW DOES SANTA GET THE PRESENTS TO ALL OF THE KIDS IN

ONE DAY?

ONE DAY?

I'M LIKE...

私が好きなのは...

>> Stephen: THAT IS A TOUGH ONE, JULIA.

>> スティーブン手強いな ジュリア

LUCKILY, I HAPPEN TO BE GOOD FRIENDS WITH SANTA, AND MAYBE HE

幸運にも私はサンタさんと仲良しですし、もしかしたら彼もそうかもしれません。

CAN ANSWER THIS ONE HIMSELF.

自分で答えられる

SANTA?

サンタ？

>> HO, HO, HO, HO, HO!

>> ｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗｗ

HI, JULIA.

ハイ ジュリア

IT'S ME, SANTA.

私よ

HOW DO I DO IT?

どうやってやるの？

I'LL TELL YA HOW I DO IT.

やり方を教えるよ

YOU DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, ALL RIGHT?

心配しなくてもいいんだよな？

YOU FILL OUT YOUR CHRISTMAS LIST, AND COME CHRISTMAS

クリスマスリストに記入して クリスマスに来い

MORNING, YOU OPEN YOUR PRETTY LITTLE EYES, AND THERE'LL BE

朝、あなたの可愛い小さな目を開くと、そこには

PRESENTS.

PRESENTS.

THAT'S ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW.

THAT'S ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW.

I'LL GET IT DONE, PANDEMIC OR NO PANDEMIC.

I'LL GET IT DONE, PANDEMIC OR NO PANDEMIC.

I'VE BEEN DOING THIS FOR 10,000 YEARS.

１万年もやってるんだぞ

IT'S GONNA GET DONE.

IT'S GONNA GET DONE.

ALL RIGHT?

ALL RIGHT?

SO I DON'T NEED THE "HUH?" I DON'T NEED THAT EXPRESSION.

"うーん？"という表現は要らないその表現は必要ない

I DON'T NEED THAT FROM YOU.

そんなの必要ないわ

SO, DON'T WORRY.

だから、心配しないで。

IT'LL GET DONE.

IT'LL GET DONE.

THANK YOU.

THANK YOU.

OH, THANKS FOR THE COOKIES.

OH, THANKS FOR THE COOKIES.

>> Stephen: THANKS, SANTA.

>> スティーブンありがとう、サンタ

AND THANK YOU, KIDS.

AND THANK YOU, KIDS.

WELL, PARENTS, I HOPE THAT GAVE YOU A LITTLE BREAK.

さて、親御さんたち、これで少しは息抜きになったかな？

AND IF YOUR KIDS HAVE QUESTIONS AT HOME, PLEASE POST A VIDEO TO

そして、あなたの子供たちが自宅で質問がある場合は、ビデオを投稿してください。

SOCIAL MEDIA USING THE HASHTAG COLBERT-KID-QUESTIONS, AND WE

ソーシャルメディアは、HASHTAGのCOLBERT-KID-QUESTIONSを使用して、そして私たちは

MIGHT JUST FEATURE IT IN OUR NEXT INSTALLMENT OF "STEPHEN

MIGHT JUST FEATURE IT IN OUR NEXT INSTALLMENT OF "STEPHEN

TAKES YOUR KIDS."

TAKES YOUR KIDS."

LOOK ME IN THE EYES.

LOOK ME IN THE EYES.