I have some demands, otherwise we're all gonna explode!

- Whoa whoa whoa.

- Hey Anna, what's going on?

- Oh yeah, why is there a bomb strapped to your chest?

- Shut up.

I have a bunch of demands.

- Yeah, sure.

What do you want?

- First of all, you both have to pay a fuck ton

of attention to me all the time.

- Yeah, okay, got it, done baby girl.

I'm DM'ing you memes right now.

- Not just memes!

Whenever I monologue,

and you bet your ass I'm gonna monologue constantly,

you can't interrupt me,

you just have to let me emotionally vent.

- You got it. - I'm monologuing!

Okay, I'm done monologuing.

- Wow, that was great baby girl,

that was so much better

than anything I ever saw at Emerson.

(both clap)

- That was great. - So good.

- Why do you keep bringing up college, Michelle?

You know I didn't go to college

and that it's a real insecurity of mine.

- I'm sorry.

- Yeah Michelle, stop antagonizing.

- Oh, like you're any better, Melissa?

Oh, I'm Melissa Macedo,

I did a double major at NYU in gender studies and acting.

I hope you're both really happy with yourselves,

losing hundreds of thousands of dollars in tuition

to an institution that promised higher education

would equal job opportunity,

but in reality, it doesn't for our generation!

- I actually went to Columbia. - Shut up!

That's even more impressive!

Okay, my next demand: all your other friendships.

They're done now, okay?

We're going full isolation, it's just us three.

I'm in control.

And then things are gonna go my way or the explode way.

- Yep, you're our only friend. - Done.

- Break up with your significant others.

Do it!

- Hey Nathan,

I don't love you anymore. - Jason,

it's over now. - Please, don't call me.

Don't follow up. - Hurry up!

- Okay, I have to go.

- Now that it's finally just the three of us...

we're going to Cabo, bitches! (giggles)

- What? - I just ended my marriage.

- Yeah, okay, so it was a surprise,

but I basically got us a private jet.

One full week in Cabo, all expenses on ya girl, don't worry.

We're gonna see clear water beaches,

we are gonna get massages,

and I hired some muscular men to feed us some fruit.

Us newly single ladies are gonna have

the time (snap) of (snap) our (snap) lives! (snap)

- I just ended my marriage.

- Anna, I know you're not a bad person.

You just grew up in an unstable family dynamic

and you're addicted to chaos.

- And let's be honest,

you probably have a touch of mental illness

and it's manifested as emotional terrorism.

- But you can't keep popping up out of nowhere,

threatening to explode us to pick a fight with us.

- We won't be held hostage anymore.

- Oh, so you don't wanna go to Cabo?

- No, we don't wanna go to Cabo.

- Well then, do you wanna go to Explode Town!?

- Yeah!

You know what, I don't care.

I just ended my 10 year marriage

because of your emotional manipulation.

So yeah, explode us Anna!

- Yeah, just explode us,

it's better than dealing with this abuse for any longer.

- Explode us! - Explode me,

you fucking coward!

- (laughing) Oh my god, you guys.

Wow, I see those acting degrees showing.

It's a joke!

It's a joke, look, it's not even real!

Look, it's graphics, see?

Megan, make it a teddy bomb. (magical chiming)

See? Oh my god, it's fake.

It's a joke, take a joke. (police siren wailing)

What is that?

Remember when I said I was DM'ing you memes?

I wasn't. - You called the police on me?

- Worse.

We called your therapist. - No.

- You're clearly not holding yourself

emotionally accountable in your sessions with her.

- So we will.

- You backstabbing-! (ladies screaming)

- This ends now, Anna.

- It's for your own good!

(Anna cries) - I didn't mean it, okay?

I don't wanna feel like this.

- We know, baby girl. - We know.

(Anna crying) - [Therapist] Anna,

this is your therapist.

You're surrounded.

Come out with your hands up and we'll peacefully take you

to the emotional accountability jail, AKA: my office.

- (whispers) I don't wanna go.

- No, you have to do it, it's for your own good.

- (sobs) I don't wanna go! - You need to get better.

Yeah. - Okay.

(Anna sniffles)

(ladies screaming)

- Haha! See ya later, bitches.

- I'm Anna Akana, and thank you to the Patreons

who supported today's video.

And thank you to BetterHelp

for sponsoring today's episode.

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Bye.