would go down, down, down

if you legalize it

then supersize it

Right now, now, now!

$4,000 an ounce

That's way too much

$400 an ounce

That's ten times the blunts

We need to smoke a little more pot, right? 

right! right now, now, now

That huge profit margin

would go down, down, down

if pot were legal

For the needy people

Right now, now, now

Does it lead to harder drugs?

No more than cigarettes

No, absolutely not

It leads to happiness

We need to smoke a little more pot, right?

right. Right now, now, now

A photo of Supreme Court nominee Elena Kagan

shows Kagan playing softball

Uh, uh…

That's been sort of a signal like two men

sunbathing together on a beach

Or something like that

The immediate implication is that they're gay

That's all, I - I've known that for a long time

And as soon as I saw that picture

I knew the implication:

She's gay, she's gay!

I saw the allegation:

she's gay, she's gay!

Her sexual orientation

Insignificant in her confirmation

Is she gaaaaay? 

A lesbian, lesbian?

Is she gaaaaaaaaaay?!

A gay, gay lesbian?

Is she gaaay?

Gay!

Is she gaaay?

Gay!

Is she gaaaaaay? 

A gay lesbian, lesbian!

Gay, gay, gay, gay, 

like two men sunbathing together on a beach

Or something like that

The White House denies her gayness

But she got Village People on her iPod playlist

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!……

Ain't nothin' wrong with a little levity

When we're long on time and short on brevity

There are posters of the Indigo Girls everywhere

And I don't--I like em too!

We are deciding to make this a conversation, by the way

Is she gaaaaaaay?

we're having a conversation

about the implication

of sexual orientation

a silly allegation

of extreme exaggeration

and pointless information

when it comes to confirmation

You would have to smooooke

Fourteen joints in 1960

Today minus 50!

To get just as hiiiigh

As in 2010 with just 1 joint

Goin' back in time always disappoints. 

Isn't that amazing?

It's gonna be crazy in 2060

If we legalize marijuana

It would be a very dark day

In California

Dark with smooooke

Very bad idea

Would it balance our budget?

It would not!

Half of voters favor legalizing pot

If we legalize marijuana

It would be a dark, dark day--very bad!

A dark, dark best day I'd ever have

A dark, dark, dark, dark day.

It's 4:20!

I have a dentist appointment

…at 5 o'clock and I--I'd prefer to be on time.