It's Santa, I know him!

Boring, they just sit on a train.

Well, it doesn't say 'greatest of all time for Robbo', does it?

Keviiiin!

Ho...ho...ho.

Where's the custard creams?

Hi, guys, we are back by popular demand,

or, as me and James like to say, our teammates are boring.

They didn't live up to the standard that we produced in the first one.

And it's Christmas films this time.

- Look at the Christmas board as well. - They've done a great effort.

A lot of red noses, marvellous.

Right, so, this film, Jingle All The Way, have you seen that?

- No. - Neither have I.

Elf, goes without saying, The Santa Claus... The Polar Express I haven't seen.

I've seen it. Average, James, average.

It's A Wonderful Life, I've heard about it, but...

Never seen it.

The Muppet Christmas Carol.

Heard good things, never seen it though.

Same.

- Grinch. - Seen it, definitely seen it.

Seen it, seen it...

Home Alone, Die Hard...

..seen it.

Some might question is Die Hard a Christmas film as well.

For me, no. I just think it's a bit violent for a Christmas film.

Love Actually and Arthur Christmas.

- Are we missing any? - For me, no.

Cos we've got a wildcard, apparently.

Maybe Home Alone 2.

Right, so, top five - Elf is defo there, it just depends how high we go.

Right, so just slide it above...

Yeah, that's there. That's there.

Uh, Polar Express - boring.

They just sit on a train.

- Really? - Uh, garbage.

Yeah, Polar Express, it's embarrassing that they've even put it on there.

Muppet Christmas Carol. I'm not a big Muppet man, to be fair,

I spend enough time around you.

Oh, come on now!

Well, this hasn't had any convo, so that's gone, innit?

This... I mean, look at it.

Yeah, but it's all-time!

Is that a big one then?

- I haven't seen it, but... - Have I just disrespected...?

Yeah, massively, it can't go on the floor.

Sorry.

- So that's got to be in black and white? - Yeah.

Doesn't make it a bad film, though, does it?

Doesn't make it a bad film, James, but come on, it's 2019.

Do they want to see this in their top five? It's black and white!

Is it the greatest of all time, or is it the greatest of all time in our opinion?

It doesn't say 'greatest of all time for Robbo', does it?

Yeah, but it's us two doing it!

We've not seen this, it can't be the greatest of all time.

You tell me one thing that happens in this film, apart from a guy lifting a woman...

It's a feelgood film.

If you want to put it in, that's fine.

Right, well, both of these can't be in, can they? Cos they're too samey.

Where's Home Alone 2?

- Thank you very much. - Wildcard.

One of these is gonna get written out.

I've not seen that one, I've only seen this one.

We're just going very modern here, aren't we?

Talk me through this.

It's about a miracle.

On, eh, 34th Street!

I don't really remember it, to be fair, James, I remember it was about a wee girl.

I remember it being good, but it's not one of my favourites.

Can't believe you've not seen The Grinch.

Have you seen the new John Lewis advert? The wee dragon?

- Yeah. - I think that's where they've maybe got their...

I'm on to you, John Lewis.

Everyone's scared of him, and then by the end of it...

They love him. I've probably seen bits of it, yeah.

When he walks into dinner and they go...

The Christmas pudding. That's lovely, that, amazing.

Anyway, back to serious business.

I think we need a nice selection in there.

Yeah, cos you need a mix.

Yeah.

But we haven't got any classic Santa Claus ones in there.

How many have we got here? Seven.

Seven. And we're debating this.

And even that.

That just stays on the board, it's hard to comment if neither of us have seen it.

This is meant to be great, but we don't like the Muppets.

That one's definitely better than that.

Definitely. Without a shadow of a doubt.

Home Alone 1 is always the first movie I watch at Christmas.

I like 2, I do like 2.

- In New York? - Yeah.

And then his mum runs down, with the tree and that.

"Keviiiin!"

And you go, "Yas!"

What a film! What a film!

But this is a cracker.

This one when the guy is throwing the bricks off the roof

and it keeps smashing him on t'grid.

The bird lady. And then right at the end the dad gets the bill he's been using.

For the room service.

"KEVIN!"

And then that's how it ends. Oh, what a film.

I forgot how good that one was. But that one's a belter.

I think we've both confirmed both Home Alones are in.

That one's probably going to miss out but I like it.

No, hold on a minute.

This is the one where the guy

goes to Italy and speaks Italian to the...

That's one of the stories, isn't it? He's just not on the picture here.

Yeah, the Prime Minister, innit? When he's dancing.

That's the most romantic thing ever.

What about him? Snake.

Good on him, though, good on him.

He got the prize in the end.

That's amazing. "Santa!"

We'll go between these three. What we think is missing here is a Santa-based one, isn't it?

Right, I don't think we can have two of them now.

Oh, my God!

I just think you've got to have a Santa one in there.

Then that's better than that.

Is it? And is it all about Santa?

Yeah. Well, look at him.

And he looks more like Santa. Look, he doesn't even look like Santa.

Yeah, but you've watched it and can't remember it, so how good is it?

- You tell me about that then. - Couldn't tell you.

What's Miracle on...

That's it!

Thank God we've got...

Yeah, but Santa Claus in court, it's like...

Yeah, but he's the real Santa!

How new is that? That's quite new, innit?

That's probably not been around long enough to get there.

Love Actually, four for me.

And it just depends - do you want to go for explosives

or do you want to go Santa in court? One of the two.

I mean, you can't say that's not a Christmas film,

he uses Christmas wrapping paper, sticky tape to tape the gun to his back.

Right, OK.

I'm just quoting what you said about needing more, Santa's not even in Die Hard.

Er...

There's not a Santa in Die Hard,

they get taken hostage on Christmas Eve - imagine that!

Is there a Santa in Home Alone 1?

- There's a Santa in Elf. - Of course there is.

See, we've got enough Santas. There's enough Santas knocking about.

Right, but this is what I'm saying to you.

For me, I don't know how it is in Leeds and stuff like that,

but for me, Glasgow, family and all that,

I would much rather see Santa in court and it become a miracle

than me getting taken hostage on Christmas Eve.

But would it be Christmas without seeing Die Hard on TV?

- It's always on TV. - No, it wouldn't be.

Ooh, good question.

Depends what mood you're in.

Do you know what?

If that's on and that's on, I ain't even clicking 'info' on that.

I forgot how good Home Alone 2 was.

- That's great, innit? - 1st of December, Home Alone.

"It's Santa, I know him!"

The thing that I think is going to get questioned is this,

but neither of us have seen it.

These are the two I've heard a lot of people talking about being classics.

No, this [The Grinch], I swear, this is trouble.

I've never heard anyone say... People say, "Oh, Elf, what a film."

- I've never heard that. - No, this is trouble.

But you're comparing it to a John Lewis advert, so how good is it?

John Lewis adverts are amazing.

They make Christmas, no?

As soon as the John Lewis advert comes out, I think, "Christmastime."

What, in October?

A little dragon running through?

Honestly, what an advert.

We need to forget about these, unfortunately.

But they're still up there, at least.

That's a permanent marker.

One?

I think so, yeah.

Two.

Three.

Four.

Five.

I know what we're missing.

Bad Santa.

- Bad Santa wouldn't get in there. - Musical.

The Greatest Showman.

It's not Christmassy, but what a film.

Yeah?

Well, that's on you.

I like Die Hard, I love Die Hard, but I've been the one that's said it's not really Christmassy.

IN HANS GRUBER'S VOICE: Ho....ho...ho.

Well, there you go then.

That's us, done.

Where's the custard creams?

Right, guys, that's our list, took some getting there.

Probably pretty controversial, I'm sure you've got your own opinions,

but if you want to subscribe and give us your favourites,

and if you've got any other ideas

for what you want me and Robbo to go through on the GOAT List...

Cos Robbo's said that you weren't happy with other people, so we can crack on again.