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  • It's time for a "Cats" review roundup.

  • Is it really as bad as the critics say?

  • Folks, we really don't like being mean

  • here at the Nerdist News office,

  • because instead of harping on how much things suck,

  • or how much we hate something,

  • we'd rather try and have practical criticisms or critiques.

  • But this doesn't always happen.

  • Sometimes we slip up, but we do certainly set out

  • to be positive and or constructive at the very least.

  • But then sometimes things happen.

  • Things that are so far outside of our control or purrview

  • that we just have to sit back, laugh, and point.

  • Things like the original version Sonic,

  • or "X-men Dark Phoenix" that's a movie all right.

  • Or even that good old starter Pokemon popplio,

  • that sweet clown seel.

  • We don't like ourselves when we do it but,

  • hey we can't help it,

  • we're only human and these things happen.

  • And sadly one of these things happened again this week,

  • the release of the film "Cats".

  • Now from the very first moment we saw the first teaser

  • at this years San Diego Comic Con,

  • we knew there was truly something special about this movie.

  • And by special we mean, horrifying Eldritch,

  • the stuff of nightmares.

  • But could the final product really be that bad?

  • Well the film is out this week,

  • which means the reviews are out there in the wild

  • and if most of them are to be believed then meowza,

  • it truly is that bad.

  • So lets have some fun and cut through some of the best

  • of the worst reviews of the movie "Cats".

  • - [Bustopher] Here we go, ha ha.

  • - Let's start things off on the nicer side

  • with our pals over at /Film whose review read,

  • "There is a thin line between idiocy and genius,

  • and "Cats" pukes a hairball on it

  • and rubs its ass all over it.

  • This is a movie where a cat version of Rebel Wilson

  • wears a halter top underneath a fur skinsuit

  • that she takes off with a zipper,

  • before leading an army of cockroaches in a song

  • and dance number alongside mice with human baby faces."

  • Wow, that was the nice one?

  • Jesus, this is why I'm a dog person.

  • Karen Han over at Polygon wrote,

  • ""Cats" defies all principles of linear time

  • or practical storytelling.

  • "Cats" is a fever dream, a hallucination,

  • an approximation of what would happen

  • if your third eye actually opened

  • and you could suddenly see into the astral plane."

  • Well folks look at the bright side a ticket to "Cats"

  • is probably cheaper than a weekend doing mushrooms

  • with your friends at Joshua Tree.

  • Now over at Jezebel Rich Juzwiak

  • hit the nail squarely on the head.

  • "You have to hand it to the iternet's hivemind:

  • Sometimes we get it right."

  • He elaborates on this point with,

  • " "Cats" mocking turns out to be entirely justified.

  • The extent of the travesty at hand

  • was immediately absorbed and expressed.

  • This much is clear after sitting through

  • all 110 minutes of the thing,

  • wishing I could wriggle out of my seat in the movie theater

  • like an actual cat does

  • from the arms of its overbearing owner."

  • Wow, now Peter Bradshaw at The Guardian took time

  • to have some fun with his review,

  • breaking it up into traditional rhyme

  • a la the original T.S. Eliot poem.

  • "The twitching of ears on their heads is distracting.

  • As they gaze at the greescreen and sashay and crawl,

  • It's weird to behold them all gurning and acting,

  • And why do so many resemble Darth Maul?"

  • Whoa, whoa, let's not drag Star Wars into this,

  • they have their own problems,

  • watch previous episodes to find out what.

  • But speaking of that weird CGI Empire's John Nugent

  • had this to say,

  • "Neither human nor cat, they all look like

  • laboratory mutants put through a Snapchat filter.

  • Your brain will never comprehend it.

  • It's jarring from the first minute

  • and remains jarring until the last."

  • Robert Abele from The Wrap chimed in with

  • "Tom Hooper's jarring fever dream of a spectacle

  • is like something that escaped from Dr. Moreau's

  • creature laboratory instead of a poet's

  • and a composer's feline (uni)verse,

  • an un-catty valley hybrid of physical

  • and digital that unsettles and crashes

  • way more often than it enchants."

  • And honestly, this seems to be the general sentiment

  • across the board.

  • Metro UK said "It is literally the stuff of nightmares."

  • The Hollywood Reporter, "I found it all exhausting."

  • Boston Globe, "Oh God, my eyes'"

  • I mean look, come on, could it really be that bad?

  • Thankfully not, Alissa Wilkinson over at Vox,

  • had some kind words for "Cats"

  • "It's literally incredible.

  • I hope I never see it again."

  • And Angie Han over at Mashable had this to say,

  • "I gasped with laughter, I covered my face,

  • I pulled at my hair,

  • I clasped my hands over my mouth to keep from screaming.

  • "Cats" had broken me, and I'd never felt happier."

  • I fact, our own Nerdist.com features editor

  • Micah Arbiter had this to say,

  • " "Cats" first act will leave you curious,

  • confused, and maybe even a little ill at ease.

  • But 20 minutes into "Cats"- or maybe it's 30, or 40,

  • or two days, or nine days; who the hell can tell?

  • A switch will flip, and you'll come

  • to some vague understanding

  • of what you're being beckoned into.

  • For some reason, this works for me.

  • I don't know.

  • It's nuts.

  • It's "Cats".

  • It's hard to explain.

  • I sprinted home from the screening and I'm nauseated."

  • Well, there yeah have it folks,

  • if you were looking for an insane spectacle

  • outside the realms of the galaxy far, far away,

  • and "The Rise of Skywalker" this weekend

  • it sounds like "Cats" is the purrfect way to spend

  • a couple of hours.

  • But what do you folks think?

  • Do these reviews make you want to go see "Cats"

  • right meow?

  • Make sure you read our full review over on Nerdist.com.

  • Or are you gonna go see multiple screenings

  • of Star Wars "The Rise of Skywalker"?

  • Our review is also up on Nerdist.com now

  • and spoiler free.

  • And tell me what movie has the best anthropomorphic cat?

  • The cats from "Cats"?

  • Or Mike Myers from "The Cat in the Hat"?

  • Let's discuss.

  • Thank you so much for watching,

  • if you enjoyed what you saw

  • why not give us a like, and subscribe?

  • And if you want to get notified every time we

  • go live with a brand new show or drop a new video,

  • please feel free to mash that little bell.

  • That way you can be up to date on all the latest

  • theories, news and rumors in the pop culture world.

  • (electronic music)

It's time for a "Cats" review roundup.

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B1 中級

CATSレビューラウンドアップ。それは本当に悪いことなのか?ヒント: はい (Nerdist News w/ Dan Casey) (CATS Review Roundup: Is It Really THAT Bad? Hint: Yes (Nerdist News w/ Dan Casey))

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    林宜悉 に公開 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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