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  • ♪ I made a man with eyes of coal and a smile so bewitchin' ♪


  • How was I supposed to know that my mom was dead in the kitchen


  • La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪ - Partay!

    ♪ラ、ラ、ラ、ラ、ラ、ラ♪- パートーイ!

  • That thing is not coming in here.

    - あれ、入っちゃダメ。

  • That thing?

    - あれって?

  • This is how you greet guests at a party?


  • Let me ask you something.


  • If I showed up here with my new girlfriend, she wouldn't be welcome in your home?


  • I'm thinking your new girlfriend wouldn't urinate on my coffee table.


  • Okay, he was more embarrassed about that than anyone, okay?

    彼は誰よりもそんなことを恥じていたよ。(観客の笑い声) わかるか?

  • And for him to have the courage to walk back in here like nothing happened...


  • All right, all right; just keep him away from me.

    - まぁ、よかろう。私に近づけないでくれればいい。

  • Thank you. Come on, Marcel.

    - どうも。さぁ、マルセル。

  • What do you say, you and I do a little mingling?


  • All right, I'll, uh, catch up with you later.


  • Look at him.


  • I'm not saying he needs to spend the whole evening with me, but at least check in.


  • Rach, these are for you.

    - レイチ、これらはあなたへの。

  • Wiper blades.

    - ワイパーブレードだ。

  • I don't even have a car.


  • I know, but with this new car smell, you'll think you do.

    - (笑) それは知ってるが、この新車の匂いで、持っていると思ってしまうよね。

  • Okay, Phoebes, your turn.


  • Ah!

    - わっ!

  • Toilet seat covers!


  • Is that what you were doing while I was getting gas?

    私がガソリンを入れている時、こんなことをしていたのか?- そうだよ。- そう。

  • You guys!

    - 君たち!

  • And for Ross, Mr. Sweet Tooth.

    - そしてロスには、Mr.Sweet Tooth だよ。

  • You got me a cola drink?

    - コーラを贈ってくれた?

  • And a lemon-lime!

    - レモンライムもあるよ!

  • Well, this... this is too much.

    - (笑)こ...これは多すぎるだ。

  • I feel like I should get you another sweater.


  • And last but not least.

    - そして、最後に。

  • They rib for your pleasure.

    - リブが付いているのでご安心を。

  • Phoebe, remember, hey! They're just fulfilling their Christmas


  • - Destiny. Yes. - Sure.

    - 運命だ。- もちろん。- そう。

  • - All right. - Okay.

    - わかった。- よし。

  • Yikes, that one doesn't look very fulfilled.


  • Oh, that's, uh, that's one of the old ones; he's just taking it to the back.

    - ああ、それは、古いやつの一つだ。隠しておいただけだ。

  • You keep the old ones in the back?


  • That is so ageist.


  • Well, we have to make room for the fresh ones.


  • So, what happens to the old guys?

    - じゃ、古いやつたちはどうなるの?

  • Well, they go into the chipper.

    - まぁ、チッパーに入れる。

  • Why do I have a feeling that's not as happy as it sounds?

    - なんか聞こえるように楽しそうではないという気がする。

  • - No, No!

    - いやー!

  • Oh!


  • No!

    - いやー!

  • Hey, hey, hey!

    - ねえ、ねえ!

  • Oh, my God!

    - うわ!

  • Merry Christmas!

    - メリークリスマス!- うわ!

  • You saved them!


  • Guys!


  • Oh, God, you're the best!


  • It's like "Night of the Living Dead" Christmas trees.

    - まるで「ナイト・オブ・ザ・リビングデッド」のクリスマスツリーのようだ。

  • Went to the store, sat on Santa's lap

    ♪お店に行って、サンタさんのお膝に座って ♪

  • Asked him to bring my friends all kinds of crap


  • He said, "All you need is to write them a song" ♪


  • They haven't heard it yet, so don't try to sing along


  • No, don't sing along

    ♪だから、一緒に歌わないで ♪(観客の笑い声)

  • Monica, Monica, have a happy Hanukkah


  • Saw Santa Claus; he said "hello" to Ross

    ♪ サンタさんを見た ♪♪「こんにちは」と彼はロスに言った。♪

  • And please tell Joey Christmas will be snowy


  • And Rachel and Chandler, has a .... lander! ♪

    ♪レイチェルとチャンドラー ♪♪どうやってー(つぶやき)♪

  • Happy holidays, everybody!


  • Thank you, happy holiday.


  • Now, that's trash, young lady.


  • No, you can't ⏤ hey!


  • Stop that young lady; she donated trash!

    あの女を止めて! 彼女はゴミを寄付した!

  • Hey!


  • The charity's on fire! Help!


  • Oh, good, thank you; I need that.


  • What is this?


  • It's nine o'clock in the morning!


  • Okay? It's no big deal.

    - 大したことはないよ。

  • Important thing to remember: stay cool.


  • - Got it! - Okay.

    - 了解!

  • Oh, my God, it's just like I dreamed it!

    - 夢にまで見た通りだ!

  • Hey, I know what'll get us up on a platform.


  • What?

    - 何?

  • The routine!

    - 日課だ!

  • When the snippy guy sees the routine, he'll wanna build us our own platform.


  • Okay, let's do it.


  • Five, six, seven, eight!


  • So, do we really need to ask who's going up on the platform next?

    - 次にプラットフォームに上がるのは誰なのか、ということを問う必要が本当にあるのか?

  • Oh, no, you get up there and do that again; exactly like that!

    - いや!その場に立って、また同じことをするんだ。 - イエーイ! - あ!

  • Make sure you get this; Dick will want it for the bloopers show.

    (観客の笑い声) -必ずこれを手に入れて。ブルーパーズショーのために、ディックはそれを欲しがるの。

  • I'm the holiday armadillo!

    - 私は休日のアルマジロです!

  • I'm a friend of Santa's, and he sent me here to wish you a merry Christmas!


  • What happened to Santa, holiday armadillo?

    - サンタさんはどうしたの?ホリデーアルマジロ。

  • Santa was unavailable so close to Christmas!

    - クリスマス間近になったから、サンタさんの予約が埋まっていました!

  • Wow, come in, have a seat...

    - わぁ、入って。お掛けください!

  • You must be exhausted coming all the way from... Texas.


  • Texas?

    - テキサスって?

  • That's right, Ben!

    - そうですよ、べン君!

  • I'm Santa's representative for all the... Southern states.


  • And... Mexico!


  • But Santa sent me here to give you these presents, Ben.


  • Maybe the lady will help me with these presents.


  • Are you for Hanukkah, too? Because I'm part Jewish.

    - あなたもハヌカーのためなの?僕が一部のユダヤ人だから?

  • You are?

    - そうなの?

  • Me, too!


  • Merry Christmas!

    - メリークリスマス!

  • What are you doing here, weird, turtle man?


  • I'm the holiday armadillo, your part Jewish friend.

    - 私は休日のアルマジロです!あなたのユダヤ人の友人です。

  • You sent me here to give Ben some presents, remember?


  • What?

    - 何のこと?

  • Did you bring me any presents, Santa?

    - サンタさん、プレゼントを持ってきてくれましたか?

  • You bet I did, Ben.


  • Put it there!


  • Wow, that is a good one.


  • Wow, looks like a... like a holiday card, you know, with the tree in the middle, and the... the skaters and the snow.


  • You know, every year I say I'm gonna send out holiday cards and I never do it; do you wanna... do you wanna send this one out together?

    - 毎年、「ホリデーカードを出そう」と言っておきながら、一度も出していないんですよね。これを一緒に送りたいですか?

  • Together, uh... like, to... to people?

    - 一緒にって、他の人に送るということ?

  • Yeah, you know, "Happy holidays, from Mona and Ross."

    - モナとロスからのホリデーのお祝いとか、そいうもの。

  • It'll be cute, okay?


  • Eh... okay.

    - あっ、わかった。

  • I don't... I'm not sure about the whole, uh... the card thing.


  • Really? Why not?


  • Uh... se... sending out a... a holiday card together.

    - だって、一緒にホリデーカードを出しているんだもの。

  • I just don't know if we're really quite there yet.


  • So, can I ask you a question? - Yeah.

    - ちょっと、質問してもいいか?

  • - Where are we? - Huh?

    -いいよ。- 私たち、今どこ? - え?(観客の笑い声)

  • You know, like, where are we? Where is this relationship going?

    - つまり、私たち今どこ?この関係はどこに向かっているのか?

  • Let's do the card!

    - カードを作ろう!

  • - What? - The card!

    -え? -カードだよ!

  • I think we're there.


  • Hi, honey, we're all here.

    - やぁ、ハニー!皆、ここにいるよ。

  • We just want to wish you a merry Christmas.


  • Aw, merry Christmas; I miss you guys.

    - メリークリスマス。皆に会いたかったよ。

  • So, is it horrible?

    - ひどいか?

  • Is everybody working really hard?


  • Ah, well, no, it's just, uh, me and Wendy.

    - いや、私とウェンディだけ。

  • Ah, wait, is Wendy the runner-up Miss Oklahoma?

    - 待てよ、ウェンディってそのミス・オクラホマの次点候補な人?

  • What?

    - え?

  • Well, she... she didn't win.

    - 彼女は勝てなかった。

  • All right, well, maybe I should let you and the second prettiest girl in Oklahoma get back to work.

    - わかった、じゃあ、君とオクラホマで2番目に可愛い女の子に仕事に戻ってもらおうかな。

  • Well, second prettiest that year.

    - その年2番目にきれいな人。

  • I mean, of all the girls in Oklahoma, she's probably


  • Oh, Chandler, stop talking!

    - やめろ、チャンドラー!

  • The wife says hi.

    - (電話を切る)嫁さんが「こんにちは」と言った。

  • Ah, fun conversation?

    - まあ、なんて面白い会話だ。

  • Ah, well, she's got this weird idea that, uh, you know, just because you and I are alone, something's gonna happen.

    - 彼女は変な考えを持っているんのも知ってるよね。君と俺が二人きりでいるだけで、何かが起こるんじゃないかってね。

  • That be so terrible?

    - それはそんなにひどいことなのか?

  • Woo-hoo, back off, missy!

    - おい、去るよ、ミッシー!

  • Missy?

    - ミッシーって?

  • I don't know, I'm not used to girls making passes at me.

    - 女の子に言い寄られることに慣れていないから。

  • Wait a minute, am I sexy in Oklahoma?


  • - I'm married! - So? I'm married.


  • I'm happily married.

    - 不幸な結婚生活。

  • Okay, let me ask you something.

    - お聞きしたいが。

  • If what you and your wife have is so great, then why are you spending Christmas with me?


  • Do you think it's snowing in Tulsa where my husband's have sex on a copying machine?

    - 夫がコピー機の上でセックスしているタルサに雪が降っていると思うの?

  • Hey!

    - おい!

  • What are you doing here?


  • I wanted to be with you.

    - あなたと一緒にいたかった。

  • I missed you so much.


  • Hey, hey, uh, who'd you miss the most?

    - おいおい、一番会いたかったのは誰?

  • Monica.

    - モニカ。

  • Gotcha!

    - わかった。

♪ I made a man with eyes of coal and a smile so bewitchin' ♪



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