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  • >> DUMBLEDORE: Welcome to the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and... Jesus, I can't talk in

  • this accent. We're going to talk normally.

  • Ok everyone? Welcome to Hogwarts y'all! Here at Hogwarts, we respect our fellow students.

  • Sorry I'm late Ms. Ratchet.

  • [magical zap sound]

  • >> DUMBLEDORE: Whoa, he's dead.

  • This is Professor Ratchet.

  • >> RATCHET: What's up y'all.

  • >> DUMBLEDORE: She has the magical sorting hat that will put you in your house.

  • Let's kick it Professor Ratchet.

  • >> RATCHET: Ginger.

  • Ghetto.

  • Oh hell yeah!

  • >> RATCHET: Big Nose.

  • [screaming in disbelief]

  • >> RATCHET: You put the dumb in Dumbledore.

  • What?

  • >> RATCHET: Boy, I don't know who you try to fool. You going to the hood.

  • But I'm Irish. Lucky child ...

  • >> RATCHET: Mmmhhmm. I'm gonna call your mother.

  • [Hogwarts bell ring]

  • [chit chat]

  • Who are they?

  • [entrance music]

  • They call themselves the plastics.

  • That one is so dumb she was in the first year for all eight movies.

  • That one's hair is so big because it's full of the Chamber of secrets.

  • And the one in the middle - Voldemort in human form - Regina George.

  • I love your robe, where did you get it?

  • It's my mom's in the 80s.

  • It's the ugliest f***ing robe I've ever seen.

  • Hey I heard that.

  • I think it's gonna rain.

  • It's like really sunny.

  • Um, do you want to hang out?

  • You can't fly with us!

  • I'm sorry, are you guys quoting Mean Girls?

  • Duh!

  • >> HARRY POTTER: Whoa, what the hell Gringo!

  • Shouldn't you be mowing my lawn?

  • Yeah, shouldn't you be mowing his lawn?

  • Yeah, what he said.

  • That's awfully racist, you bloody wanker.

  • [laughing hysterically] What's he saying?

  • >> HARRY POTTER: You're black bro, be black.

  • [bleep] off, [bleep]

  • >> HARRY POTTER: You are like a black Ronald McDonald.

  • >> HARRY POTTER: You know what? I've had it! Me and you.

  • Yeah, yeah. Me and you.

  • Oh here we go.

  • I'm done, I'm done.

  • >> HARRY POTTER: I'm tired, [bleep] this.

  • See you later, bro.

  • Damn girl!

  • D*ck!

  • [magic spells]

  • stop-stop-stop-stop stop-stop-stop-stop stop-stop-stop-stop

  • stop-stop. [correcting magic spells]

  • Alright, you do it.

  • [magic spells]

  • Ahh.

  • >> HARRY POTTER: Ok, listen. Calm down. I was just doing my homework.

  • What, in the girl's bathroom? Get the hell out.

  • >> HARRY POTTER: Call me.

  • Now! Get, get ...

  • >> HARRY POTTER: Three, two, one ... Quidditch!

  • Wait, that's cheating.

  • >> HARRY POTTER: That's it!

  • >> VOLDEMORT: Harry Potter

  • >> HARRY POTTER: What the hell?

  • >> VOLDEMORT: Oh my god Harry, you are finally here. >> HARRY POTTER: You are Voldemort?

  • >> HARRY POTTER: That looks like a Party City costume.

  • >> VOLDEMORTNo it doesn't. I look like freaking Britney Spears on the BMA. >> HARRY POTTER: That snake is fake as [bleep].

  • >> VOLDEMORT: No, but it looks sexy. >> HARRY POTTER: You're weird bro. You look like ET went to the hood.

  • >> HARRY POTTER: Why are you moving like that?

  • >> VOLDEMORT: Let's do this [bleep]. >> HARRY POTTER: This is for my parents. Three, two, one ...

  • >> HARRY POTTER: Don't do [sound] with your mouth. They do that in editing. Special effects. No, let's do this again. Back up.

  • Three, two, one.

  • >> HARRY POTTER: Again with the (bleep) sound?

  • >> VOLDEMORT: Let me do my sound bro. >> HARRY POTTER: Alright, alright, alright.

  • >> HARRY POTTER: Three, two, one.

  • Oh my god, my ball. >> HARRY POTTER: You killed him.

  • Oh my god, shut up. >> HARRY POTTER: Do you realize you just did in two seconds what I've been trying to do for eight movies?

  • Oh my god, is this yours?

  • Oh (bleep)!

>> DUMBLEDORE: Welcome to the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and... Jesus, I can't talk in

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ハリー・ポッター - ホグワーツ高校|レル・ポンズ&ルディ・マンキューソ (Harry Potter - Hogwarts High School | Lele Pons & Rudy Mancuso)

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    Jerry shiu に公開 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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