Hi. James from engVid.

Dreaming, what am I dreaming about?

Well, this lesson, to be honest.

I'm trying to find a way that would be easier to have difficult conversations.

It's a dream, but it's a dream I'm going to help you turn into a reality.

Today what we're going to look at is nine words... ten words to give you to use in conversations

that you might find difficult in English that no one else has given you.

I will give you some situations that you could use these words in, and then we're going to

play, have a little bit of fun.

Okay?

It's something you can do by yourself, you can do it with a friend, or a group, and it

will help you become more creative and a lot better with English, more like a native speaker

because you'll understand what these words are and how to use them appropriately.

Are you ready?

Let's go to the board.

As E says, these are difficult conversations.

There are many different types, from relationship and work, so we're going to have a bit of fun.

And I'll start off with the words first.

Let's look at the word "confess".

When you confess something it means you must give the truth or tell the truth about something,

something that someone hasn't known, you will have to tell them.

Right?

I have to confess that I like yellow and I'm wearing yellow underwear.

You didn't know, it's hidden, but now you know.

"Resolve", it means to find a way.

If you resolve to do something, you want to resolve, you have decided to do something

and you've got a strong...

A strong desire to do it.

A resolve to lose 15 pounds means I've made a promise to myself to work towards that to do that.

"Regret".

Regret, you say you're sorry, and it means I feel bad about it.

When you regret you wish you didn't do it.

I regret breaking off with a girlfriend five years ago because she would have made the

perfect wife.

I regret.

"Condolences", use this one what we call sparingly, which means don't use it a lot.

Condolences...

Or the word "condolence" is usually reserved for death.

Okay?

So, when you say "condolence", if you say: "I give my condolences", you wouldn't say

that if someone lost their job.

"Oh, you lost your job?

My condolences."

They're not dying.

They just don't have work.

Okay?

They have a future.

But if you hear someone is really sick, they have cancer, serious cancer or their parent

or someone that they know has died, then you would say: "I offer my condolences."

You can even use it for a pet, if their dog that they've had for ten years has died, offer condolences.

It means I'm extremely, extremely sorry that this has happened to you.

Okay?

"Empathize".

"Empathy" is to feel like someone else.

"Empathize" is to...

We can understand and have...

Share the emotion with you.

We have that empathy.

And I say, I see a poor person on the street, and someone says: "Look, they're lazy."

I go: "Can't you empathize?

Imagine what it would be like.

Feel what they feel."

"Mend".

"Mend" means to fix, fix something.

You want to mend it.

You can mend a relationship.

If you're fighting: We need to mend this relationship.

All right?

We need to make it better, fix it.

If you break your arm and it's fixed, the arm is mended, you go your arm will mend;

fix.

I like "disillusion".

"An illusion" is something you think is true, but it's not.

It's an illusion.

Magic tricks.

Here you go, here it's gone.

Whenever I go like this, there's the illusion that I've been standing here waiting for you

to come back.

Right?

It's all cameras.

To be disillusioned is to believe something was true and you find out it's not true anymore.

You think your mother or father is the greatest person on the planet, and then you find out,

just like you, they have flaws or weaknesses, and they make mistakes.

And you're like: "But I thought you were perfect."

You had become disillusioned.

They weren't perfect or they are not perfect.

"Consider".

Consider this.

Think.

And if you know the song I was trying to sing, REM.

Anyway, consider, think about something.

"I need you to consider", to think about.

"Impact", bap!

How something affects something else when it hits it.

Bullets have an impact-boof-they hit you.

Whoa.

There's impact, it affects your body.

Okay?

What is the impact?

When this change happens, what will happen?

Impact, there's impact to it.

"React".

"Act" is action, "react" means back or again.

So, if somebody pushes you, how do you react?

What do you do back?

Okay.

How do you react?

Or if you won a million dollars, how do you react?

You've got information, give information back out.

Like, I won a million: "Woo-hoo!

I'm rich!"

Okay?

And here's a word: "acknowledge".

If you look carefully in there, there's the word "know".

When you acknowledge we have to say: "We know this is true."

We know this is true.

We acknowledge this person to be a great citizen.

We're saying we know it's true that they're a great citizen.

And before I go further, I have to acknowledge: Horae!

And I'm not saying the word.

Her name is Horae who gave me this beautiful shirt from Africa.

Thank you.

You can get one, too; just go to Africa.

Otherwise, this is mine.

Thank you, Horae, for this shirt, and I'm proudly wearing it on engVid, so I hope you

get to see this video and go: "I gave him this shirt", and yes you did.

Horae Ba gave me this shirt.

Thanks, Horae.

Okay, anyway.

So, difficult conversations.

I've taught you some words, gave you some, you know, vocabulary, and you're like: "Great,

I have vocabulary, but how is that a conversation?"

Well, here's where we're going to use our imagination and creativity.

If you're by yourself, you can make a speech.

And I might recommend that you take two words or three words, definitely one word and try

to speak to someone using it, and you would pretend that this person would be here.

So, in this case, E will be my person.

So you can draw your own little Mr. E on your paper, and put E out there and you can talk

to E. Or if you have a friend you're sitting beside, you can go: "Okay, I'm going to pretend

to be the parent, and you'll be the child.

I'll be the president, you'll be the citizen.

I'll be the man, you'll be the woman."

I will be the man, you can be the woman.

I'm not going to be the woman.

Okay.

Ready?

So let's do the first one.

So, the first thing you would do is you would say, here's the situation: Our president has

to tell his/her people that his/her...

I know this is complicated, but just I'll do it one way and then you'll get it.

Okay?

A person has to tell his people that his government cannot help them in an emergency, or a president

has to tell her people that her government cannot help them in an emergency.

By the way, that's the proper way to write in English.

If you have to do that, a lot of times we put "them" or "their" to make it easier, but

I just want to give you an example where it's supposed to be written correctly, both genders

indicated to show that it could be a man or a woman.

Back to the lesson.

Okay, so a president has to tell their people that, or tell his or her people that there's

a problem.

So, here we go.

How many words, what do you think, E?

I think I have to use, what?

Okay, four...

Okay, I have to use four words, here we go.

My American people, I stand before you today and I regret having to tell you that there

is an emergency in the State of the Union: Donald Trump's President.

I mean: There's an emergency in the State of the Union.

I would like to give my condolences to those people who have been affected by this situation.

We are trying to empathize with the pain you may be going through, and we hope to mend

our nation as soon as possible.

I'm going to go for bonus, here.

I know you are disillusioned with what has gone on and our lack of response to help you-going

for the bonus-but please consider that we are under tremendous stress because of the

impact of this situation on our nation.

We are reacting in the best way possible, and we hope that you can acknowledge the effort

we have put forth to help you out.

That's how a president should sound.

Anybody out there, take note, send it off to some people.

Okay?

Anyway, that way would be a president apologizing for not being able to help the people in a

situation.

Okay?

Puerto Rico, hope you're okay.

So, next, here's another situation.

E says four for the next one, I'll do it.

A doctor has to tell a parent that his or her child has died.

Oh.

Mrs. E, I regret to...

I would like to offer the condolences of the hospital in this tragic situation.

I confess I don't have the words to express how you must feel and what we'd like to do

to help you.

I know my words cannot mend this situation for you.

And I hope the fact I'm taking this time will have the impact, I hope, which is to bring

some solace to your life at the loss of your child.

Once again we offer our condolences.

Okay?

That's what a doctor might say.

And the third one, you have to tell your lover that you've cheated on him or her.

I'll make this one funny.

Okay.

Ready?

You know, baby, you have to acknowledge that the sex has not been good of late.

Okay?

You have to acknowledge that, it's true.

And I know you're going to react badly to what I'm going to tell you, but please consider

that I tried, and I tried, and I tried, and I waited, and I was trying to...

I was trying to empathize with you that you were going through some difficulties, and

I regret what I did.

I cheated on you.

Now, I'm going to resolve not to do that again.

I'm going to resolve not to do that again, and I confess I felt badly when I did it because

I love you so much, and I hope that these words will help mend our relationship.

Okay?

Baby, can you consider keeping me?

Please?

Please?

Now, you can try that, I doubt it will work, but at least you have the English words now

to say something and hope she understands that you're serious, because you can say:

"I even went to engVid to learn these lessons...

These words to speak to you in the way that I thought was important."

Okay?

All right.

So, look, enough joking around.

So, these are nine words, so you've learned some vocabulary.

I've given you a situation where I've used the words randomly, as you can see these are

random, to generate conversation.

Now, of course, when you're doing this you wouldn't just go into a speech, but you might

say for instance the doctor one, Mrs. E, I confess there's something I regret having

to tell you today, and you'd wait for her to respond, like: "What do you have to say,

doctor?"