No, he's dead.

Rest in peace.

You will be missed.

I don't get why some people think I'm dead.

I was only gone for a few days.

You don't need an excuse to disappear for a few days.

It's called an existential crisis.

Last video I made was June 28th.

And now it's J-j-j-october.

CRAB!

Oh no...

Sigh... frickin cleaning ladie's gotta stop messing with my shittake.

One day to one year...

One year to one day...

There we go.

Evan, where are your videos?

Two weeks without video, I'm almost dead inside, forced to watch Filthy Frank.

Oh...

I am so sorry.

When are you going to make another video?

When's the next video?

I have to make another video!

Okay... d-d-don't panic.

Um... quickly Evan, think of something before the meds wear out.

Evan, if you're so terrible at video editting, why not let the computer do it for you?

That's a brilliant plan Evan, why didn't I think of that myself?

You know what?

You deserve another one.

Okay, here's what we do Evan.

Why don't we make a device that can let us innocuously mark down the mildly interesting

parts of what we film while we're filming so that the computer can later go through

these mildly interesting markers and piece together a very interesting video for us?

That sounds wonderful, tell me more.

Okay, so we have to slip our markers into the recording stream somehow, and we do have

a stereo mic input jack, and our microphone is mono so we don't need

both channels for that.

I say, we keep the left channel for recording audio and we use the right channel to record

markers.

All we need is to make a device that takes a button input,

and when the button's pressed, it'll fire a blip signal into one of the channels.

Then we write a program to automatically interpret these blips and edit the video into some sort

of wonderful masterpiece.

Did you get all that?

Because I didn't.

But that's okay, we'll just make it up as we go.

What are we looking for again?

Oh, we need something that can generate blips.

ATTiny85, you little piece of rat poop.

We need a battery.

This'll do.

Microphone, microphone?

Perfect.

And we get a button.

And one more thing we need is an audio jack.

That'll do.

Okay!

So the mic is going to into the left channel of the audio port and record our audio stream

like a mic should.

And our battery is going to power the ATTiny chip which is going to fire the blips into

the other channel when you press the button.

Now, right after it fires a blip, it's important that we put the chip back into sleep mode,

so that it cuts the current draw down to like, 0.2 microamps, so theoretically, we won't

even need to change the battery for the next...

100 years.

Don't trust me on that one.

I don't use calculators, because clearly, I use abacuses.

Ugh my sinuses are flaring up.

Anyway, you take your device, you plug it in,

and you take your other end, and you plug it into there.

Now, whenever I say the magic word, I will press the magic button.

HAHEUH.

Do I smell an ad break?

I don't smell anything.

Weird... whatever.

And record.

Dear officer Dickens, It was very nice meeting a dictator like yourself

today.

The dichotomy between our morals is absolutely ridiculous.

I was swerving outside the bike lane to prevent a certain death by steel,

and you thought I was dicking around.

Next time can you just not be such a dick about it?

Thank you.

That's all I have to say.

Ho... well would you look at this laddie?

We got our regular audio track on the left channel.

Then we got our blips on the right channel, wherever the button was pressed.

Now we just write a script to automatically detect these blips and place a marker at each

of these points.

Yeah, I think that's a good place to start.

HAHA!

Well I agree, it's no wonderful masterpiece yet but we're getting there.

You have to be patient with me.

See first, we have to do something about this.

Because it's just so... how do you say...

Okay, we're starting over, this is good.

We need some design inspiration from others because we're very creative on this channel.

Why do I have a framed portrait of Steve Jobs on my window sill?

We'll never know, but let's just get past that.

You make products, I make products.

Well, I don't make products, yet.

But how would one go about...

What's that Steve?

Oh...

ATTiny.

208 mil?

That's like even tinier than my ATTiny.

Oh... bad choice of words.

Let's get say uh... one...

hundred.

Battery holder.

100!

Buttons.

300!

Capacitors.

500! Mics.

Audio jacks.

Resistors.

Checkout!

Slight problem.

We just ordered a whole bunch of solder mount parts, and they're incredibly small.

Which means, we can't be using these protoboards anymore.

I really don't want to have to go design my own board, if I don't have to.

Ahhh... think think think Evan.

We're designing a board!

Yay!

I'm really hoping that I didn't make a mistake on these boards.

I should really double check before I send these in.

Nah.

I'm Evan frickin Kale!

What can go wrong?

3 days?

I can't wait that long.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how you botch one hundred circuit boards.

Bad Evan.

Bad Evan.

The blueprint I read off of for the audio jack said top view, but oh, it was not the

top view.

So now all the pads on the remote jack are all flipped.

Sigh...

I guess I could just patch it manually?

Why does my life have to suck so much?

That should do it.

Okay.

This...

This is the ATTiny chip we were using before.

And THIS...

This is the ATTiny chip we're using now.

Upgrading programmer.

Ejecting.

Upgrade complete.

And that, is 100.

Populate the rest of them... all 100 of the rest of them.

It can't be that bad.

One hundred.

EY!

What you looking at punk?

You can't touch me, foo!

I'm so fast, I'mma knock yo teeth out before you can find welfare assistance in Canada.

I know karate man.

Brazilian jujitsu.

Roundhouse five-forty!

Sonic boom!

Ei... ei... where you going?!

You put that back!

Alright.

I present you the Blipper!

HAHA!

On the top we have three buttons, for a wide selection of different points of interest,

like you might have this one for something you find mildly interesting,

or, you can have this one for something you find somewhat interesting.

Save the last one for something you find strangely arousing, or whatever you want!

DROPTEST!

This is a trigger indicator.

Click.

Click.

Click.

On the back, we have a 2.5 jack for a remote switch or a trigger or pedal.

And over here on the side we have a 3.5 jack that connects to the camera mic like so.

And on the bottom, we have a hotshoe mount that slides onto the camera's hotshoe, like

so.

There we go.

Now...

Why did I put the buttons there again?

We need a remote.

Just need a three button controller like...

Nope.

That looks way too much like a d...

We're gonna go with this.

Should I give up or should I keep on chasing pavement?

Ei...

Ei, ei, ei you!

Nice.

And record.

They're eating children!

Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo.

Nice boots.

Bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb bomb.

Cats.

I'm Mr.Meseeks, look at me!

Ghee ghee ghee ghee ghee.

HAAAAAAA!

That was a really long detour, and I don't really know if it was necessary or not.

Now the secret to making everything work is the program.

The program is the thing that's going to interpret all these blips and put everything into some

wonderful masterpiece.

You know, we really should've thought this through before we made 100 pieces.

And recorded some really oddly disturbing footage.

But thank god, I picked up a few things from Silicon Valley.

Ctrl C. Ctrl... *hic*

Ctrl...

*BLARARARAR* That's okay, there's probably enough code

in there anyway.

I think I'm gonna name her...

What wizardry is this?!

So you're saying that I now own a device to effortlessly create shimmery youtube videos?

Anybody with a device like this can blow up Yewtoobs with a click of a button!

Think of the repercussions.

This could be the end of all Youtubes.

You're right I gotta do the right thing.

Did you really think I was going to keep a hundred of them here, in my igloo?

This was the plan all along.

To blow up Yewtoobs.

I used you Steve.

Say what?

Oh hullo, I didn't realize you were still watching.

So, Christmas is coming and you know what would make a fantastic gift?

Or just get one because it's made in Canada.

By a Chinaman.

That's like the closest you can get to something handmade by Santa's elves.

This video's getting demonetized isn't it?

We were doing so well.

But Evan!

My nephew is not really into camera gear, do you have anything else?

How about a nice, non-objective t-shirt?

Also, made in Canada.

Slash American Apparel.

Okay!

Well there's also the um... is it ready?

There's going to be a reincarnation of the EFF YEW SEE K...

Or of course, if you like what I do here, but don't really care much for my merch, I

understand.

You can also support me and my open source inventions through Patreon, and join the family

over there.

Is there anything else...

Earl says follow him on Instagram.

Don't do it.

He didn't follow me back.