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  • Translator: Crawford Hunt Reviewer: Joanna Pietrulewicz

    子供の頃 自分には 特別な力があると信じていました

  • When I was a child, I knew I had superpowers.


  • That's right.


  • (Laughter)

    私って本当にすごいんだから と自信満々でした

  • I thought I was absolutely amazing because I could understand

    褐色肌の人たちの気持ちが わかったからです

  • and relate to the feelings of brown people,

    例えば保守的なムスリムである 祖父のような人です

  • like my grandfather, a conservative Muslim guy.

    また アフガニスタン人の母や パキスタン人の父のような

  • And also, I could understand my Afghan mother, my Pakistani father,

    そこまで信仰が深くない リベラル派の人々も理解できました

  • not so religious but laid-back, fairly liberal.

    それから もちろん

  • And of course, I could understand

    白人の気持ちだって 理解できました

  • and relate to the feelings of white people.

    私の故郷 ノルウェーの白人です

  • The white Norwegians of my country.

    白人であれ 褐色人種であれ どんな人であっても

  • You know, white, brown, whatever --


  • I loved them all.


  • I understood them all,

    その人たち同士は 必ずしも理解し合えなくても

  • even if they didn't always understand each other;


  • they were all my people.

    それでも 父は いつも私のことを心配して

  • My father, though, was always really worried.

    私にこう言い続けました 最良の教育を受けたって

  • He kept saying that even with the best education,


  • I was not going to get a fair shake.

    賢くなったって 差別は受けるだろうし

  • I would still face discrimination, according to him.

    認められたいなら 有名になるしかない というのが

  • And that the only way to be accepted by white people


  • would be to become famous.

    7歳の時 父との会話で こんなことまで言われたんです

  • Now, mind you, he had this conversation with me when I was seven years old.

    7歳の私に向かって 父は

  • So while I'm seven years old, he said,

    「認められるにはスポーツか 音楽をやるしかないぞ」と言いました

  • "Look, so it's either got to be sports, or it's got to be music."

    父は残念ながらスポーツができず 音楽をやる羽目になりました

  • He didn't know anything about sports -- bless him -- so it was music.

    7歳の時 私のおもちゃと人形は 父が残らず かき集めて

  • So when I was seven years old, he gathered all my toys, all my dolls,


  • and he threw them all away.

    代わりに与えられたのは 安っぽい小さなキーボードと

  • In exchange he gave me a crappy little Casio keyboard and --


  • (Laughter)

    そして 歌の稽古です

  • Yeah. And singing lessons.

    何時間も何時間も 毎日欠かさず 練習を強いられました

  • And he forced me, basically, to practice for hours and hours every single day.

    すぐに 人前で演奏もさせられ お客さんは増えていきました

  • Very quickly, he also had me performing for larger and larger audiences,

    面白いことに ノルウェーの多様性を 象徴するような存在になりました

  • and bizarrely, I became almost a kind of poster child

    もちろん とても誇らしかったです

  • for Norwegian multiculturalism.

    この頃は 新聞にも 褐色人種の人が

  • I felt very proud, of course.


  • Because even the newspapers at this point

    自分の特別な力が増しつつあるような 実感がありました

  • were starting to write nice things about brown people,

    12歳の時 学校からの帰り道に

  • so I could feel that my superpower was growing.


  • So when I was 12 years old, walking home from school,

    大好きなsalty feet (しょっぱい足) を買いに行きました

  • I took a little detour


  • because I wanted to buy my favorite sweets called "salty feet."


  • I know they sound kind of awful,

    小さな足の形をした しょっぱいリコリスのキャンディーです

  • but I absolutely love them.

    こうやって口に出して説明してみると 気持ちの悪いお菓子ですが

  • They're basically these little salty licorice bits in the shape of feet.

    それでも 大好きでした

  • And now that I say it out loud, I realize how terrible that sounds,


  • but be that as it may, I absolutely love them.

    大きな白人男性が 入り口を塞いでいました

  • So on my way into the store,

    避けて通ろうとしたら 今度は私の前に立ち塞がり

  • there was this grown white guy in the doorway blocking my way.


  • So I tried to walk around him, and as I did that, he stopped me

    そして 私の顔に唾を吐きかけ

  • and he was staring at me,


  • and he spit in my face, and he said,

    黒人のクソガキ パキのクソガキ

  • "Get out of my way


  • you little black bitch, you little Paki bitch,


  • go back home where you came from."


  • I was absolutely horrified.

    怖さのあまり 顔についた唾を 拭うことさえできずにいました

  • I was staring at him.

    自分の涙が男の唾に 混じってもです

  • I was too afraid to wipe the spit off my face,

    周りを見渡しながら こう願っていました

  • even as it was mixing with my tears.

    今すぐ 誰か大人が駆けつけて来て この男を止めてくれればと

  • I remember looking around, hoping that any minute now,

    でも 周りの人は見ないフリをして 急ぎ足で通り過ぎて行きました

  • a grown-up is going to come and make this guy stop.

    私は非常に混乱し こんなことを思っていました

  • But instead, people kept hurrying past me and pretended not to see me.

    「白人の仲間たち 何とかしてよ! どこにいるの? 何が起こってるの?

  • I was very confused because I was thinking, well,

    どうして誰も 助けに来てくれないの?」

  • "My white people, come on! Where are they? What's going on?

    当然ですが お菓子は買いませんでした

  • How come they're not coming and rescuing me?"


  • So, needless to say, I didn't buy the sweets.

    その時は もう大丈夫だと思いましたが

  • I just ran home as fast as I could.

    時が経ち 音楽活動が軌道に乗るにつれて

  • Things were still OK, though, I thought.

    褐色肌の人たちからも 嫌がらせを受けるようになりました

  • As time went on, the more successful I became,

    両親と同じコミュニティーの 一部の男性にとっては

  • I eventually started also attracting harassment from brown people.

    女性が音楽活動をしたり メディアでもてはやされるなんて

  • Some men in my parent's community felt that it was unacceptable


  • and dishonorable for a woman to be involved in music

    間もなく 自分のコンサートで 襲撃を受けるようになりました

  • and to be so present in the media.

    あるコンサートでの出来事です 舞台から乗り出した私の目に

  • So very quickly, I was starting to become attacked at my own concerts.

    最後に映ったのは 褐色肌の若者の顔でした

  • I remember one of the concerts, I was onstage, I lean into the audience

    次の瞬間 私の目をめがけて 薬品のようなものが飛んで来て

  • and the last thing I see is a young brown face,

    ほとんど何も見えなくなり 目からは涙が溢れましたが

  • and the next thing I know is some sort of chemical is thrown in my eyes


  • and I remember I couldn't really see and my eyes were watering

    オスロの街角で 今度は褐色肌の男性から 顔に唾を吐かれたこともありました

  • but I kept singing anyway.


  • I was spit in the face in the streets of Oslo, this time by brown men.


  • They even tried to kidnap me at one point.

    髭を生やした中年男性から 街角で呼び止められて

  • The death threats were endless.

    こう言われました 「お前が心底憎らしい

  • I remember one older bearded guy stopped me in the street one time,

    お前のせいで 俺の娘まで

  • and he said, "The reason I hate you so much


  • is because you make our daughters think

    若い男性から 警告されたこともありました

  • they can do whatever they want."

    音楽はイスラームの教えに反するし 売春婦の仕事だ

  • A younger guy warned me to watch my back.

    活動を続けるならば レイプしてやる

  • He said music is un-Islamic and the job of whores,

    そして私のような売春婦が 再び生まれないように腹を切り裂いてやるぞと

  • and if you keep this up, you are going to be raped

    私はここでも 非常に戸惑いました

  • and your stomach will be cut out so that another whore like you will not be born.


  • Again, I was so confused.

    褐色肌の仲間にも こんな扱いを 受けるようになるなんて 一体なぜなの?

  • I couldn't understand what was going on.

    2つの世界の 橋渡しになるのではなく

  • My brown people now starting to treat me like this -- how come?

    2つの世界の間の溝に 落ちていくような感覚でした

  • Instead of bridging the worlds, the two worlds,

    唾を吐かれて 私の力は奪われたのでしょう

  • I felt like I was falling between my two worlds.


  • I suppose, for me, spit was kryptonite.

    殺しの脅迫は後を絶たず 嫌がらせも続いていました

  • So by the time I was 17 years old,

    状況があまりにも悪化したので ついに 母が口を開きました

  • the death threats were endless, and the harassment was constant.

    「もうあなたを守りきれないし 安全も保証できないの

  • It got so bad, at one point my mother sat me down and said,


  • "Look, we can no longer protect you, we can no longer keep you safe,

    私はロンドンへの片道切符を手にし 荷物をまとめて国を去りました

  • so you're going to have to go."

    あの頃 1番辛かったのは 誰も何も言ってくれなかったことです

  • So I bought a one-way ticket to London, I packed my suitcase and I left.

    私のノルウェー脱出は 大きく報じられたのに

  • My biggest heartbreak at that point was that nobody said anything.

    褐色肌の仲間も 白人の仲間も 誰も何も言いませんでした

  • I had a very public exit from Norway.

    「待って おかしいよ

  • My brown people, my white people -- nobody said anything.

    この子を応援しようよ 守ろうよ 私たちの仲間なんだから」だなんて

  • Nobody said, "Hold on, this is wrong.


  • Support this girl, protect this girl, because she is one of us."

    それどころか こんな気持ちでした 空港の手荷物引取所で

  • Nobody said that.

    ベルトコンベアーの上を 様々なスーツケースが

  • Instead, I felt like -- you know at the airport,


  • on the baggage carousel you have these different suitcases

    必ず ポツンと1つ残る スーツケースがあります

  • going around and around,

    誰も持って行こうとしないし 所有者も現れません

  • and there's always that one suitcase left at the end,


  • the one that nobody wants, the one that nobody comes to claim.

    あれほどまでの孤独や喪失感は 感じたことがありませんでした

  • I felt like that.

    ロンドンに移住してから 結局また音楽活動を再開しました

  • I'd never felt so alone. I'd never felt so lost.

    国が変わっても 残念ながら 同じような状況でした

  • So, after coming to London, I did eventually resume my music career.

    ある時 届いた脅迫文は こんな感じでした

  • Different place, but unfortunately the same old story.

    お前を殺して 川ができるほどの血を流させてやると

  • I remember a message sent to me saying that I was going to be killed

    そして死ぬ前には 何度もレイプしてやると

  • and that rivers of blood were going to flow


  • and that I was going to be raped many times before I died.

    こんな言葉にはもう 慣れっこになっていましたが

  • By this point, I have to say,

    今度は 私の家族までもが 脅され始めたのです

  • I was actually getting used to messages like this,

    そこで再び 荷物をまとめて 音楽を辞め アメリカに移り住みました

  • but what became different was that now they started threatening my family.

    もう うんざりでした

  • So once again, I packed my suitcase, I left music and I moved to the US.

    こんな思いをするのは もう嫌でした

  • I'd had enough.

    音楽を選んだのは 私ではなく 父なのに

  • I didn't want to have anything to do with this anymore.

    そのせいで殺されるのは 絶対に嫌でした

  • And I was certainly not going to be killed for something

    なんだか 自分を見失い

  • that wasn't even my dream -- it was my father's choice.


  • So I kind of got lost.


  • I kind of fell apart.

    これからの人生 どれだけ時間がかかってもいいから

  • But I decided that what I wanted to do


  • is spend the next however many years of my life

    どんな方法でもいいから 少しでも

  • supporting young people


  • and to try to be there in some small way,

    様々な団体で ボランティアを始めて

  • whatever way that I could.

    ヨーロッパに住む ムスリムの若者を支援しました

  • I started volunteering for various organizations

    すると 驚いたことに

  • that were working with young Muslims inside of Europe.

    あまりにも多くの若者が 苦しみや葛藤を抱えていたのです

  • And, to my surprise, what I found was

    家族やコミュニティーに関する問題を 本当にたくさん抱えていました

  • so many of these young people were suffering and struggling.

    そういった環境では 子供にとっての幸せや人生は

  • They were facing so many problems with their families and their communities

    大人の名誉や評判に比べて 軽視されているようでした

  • who seemed to care more about their honor and their reputation

    もしかしたら自分はそこまで孤独でも 変でもないのかなと 思い始めました

  • than the happiness and the lives of their own kids.

    私みたいな人は もっといるんじゃないかと

  • I started feeling like maybe I wasn't so alone, maybe I wasn't so weird.

    実は 世間にはあまり 理解されていないのですが

  • Maybe there are more of my people out there.

    ヨーロッパで育った 私のような子供に本当によくあるのが

  • The thing is, what most people don't understand


  • is that there are so many of us growing up in Europe

    自分らしく 生きさせてもらえないのです

  • who are not free to be ourselves.


  • We're not allowed to be who we are.

    結婚したり交際することは 許されません

  • We are not free to marry

    人生の進路も 自分で選べません

  • or to be in relationships with people that we choose.

    ヨーロッパに住むムスリムにとっては これが当たり前なのです

  • We can't even pick our own career.

    世界で一番自由な社会にいても 束縛を受けています

  • This is the norm in the Muslim heartlands of Europe.

    人生 夢 将来 どれも私たちのものではありません

  • Even in the freest societies in the world, we're not free.

    親やムスリムコミュニティーの 所有物なのです

  • Our lives, our dreams, our future does not belong to us,

    若者から数え切れないほどの 話を聞きました

  • it belongs to our parents and their community.


  • I found endless stories of young people


  • who are lost to all of us,

    苦しみを抱えているのです それもたった1人で

  • who are invisible to all of us

    子供たちは強制結婚をさせられ 名誉の名の下に暴力や虐待を受けます

  • but who are suffering, and they are suffering alone.

    このような若者を支援する仕事を始めて 何年か経ってから

  • Kids we are losing to forced marriages, to honor-based violence and abuse.


  • Eventually, I realized after several years of working with these young people,

    怖がったり 身を隠しながら 残りの人生を過ごすわけにはいかないし

  • that I will not be able to keep running.

    実際に行動を 起こさないといけないと思いました

  • I can't spend the rest of my life being scared and hiding

    私だけでなく 似たような境遇の人々が 口を閉ざしたままでは

  • and that I'm actually going to have to do something.


  • And I also realized that my silence, our silence,

    それで 決めたんです 子供の頃の特別な力を呼び起こして

  • allows abuse like this to continue.

    こういった問題に別の側面から関わる 当事者の大人たちに

  • So I decided that I wanted to put my childhood superpower to some use

    家族と生まれた国の間で板挟みになる 若者の気持ちを理解してもらおうと

  • by trying to make people on the different sides of these issues understand

    そこで私は映画を作り始め 若者に聞いた話を語り始めました

  • what it's like to be a young person stuck between your family and your country.

    もう一つ 理解してもらいたかったのは このような問題に真剣に向き合わないと

  • So I started making films, and I started telling these stories.


  • And I also wanted people to understand the deadly consequences of us

    一作目で題材にしたのは バナズという少女です

  • not taking these problems seriously.

    バナズはロンドンに住む クルド系の17歳で

  • So the first film I made was about Banaz.

    聞き分けが良く 両親の言うことは何でもしました

  • She was a 17-year-old Kurdish girl in London.


  • She was obedient, she did whatever her parents wanted.

    両親が選んだ男性と 結婚もしましたが

  • She tried to do everything right.

    夫には日常的に殴られ レイプされました

  • She married some guy that her parents chose for her,

    家族に助けを求めると こう言われました

  • even though he beat and raped her constantly.

    「家に帰って 旦那さんにもっと尽くしなさい」

  • And when she tried to go to her family for help, they said,

    娘が離婚して出戻るなんて もってのほかだったのです

  • "Well, you got to go back and be a better wife."

    当然 家名に泥を塗ることに なりますからね

  • Because they didn't want a divorced daughter on their hands

    夫の暴力はひどく 耳から流血するほどでした

  • because, of course, that would bring dishonor on the family.

    そんな夫の元からやっと逃げ出し 自分が選んだ若い男性と

  • She was beaten so badly her ears would bleed,


  • and when she finally left and she found a young man that she chose


  • and she fell in love with,


  • the community and the family found out


  • and she disappeared.

    自宅の下に埋められていた スーツケースの中から発見されました

  • She was found three months later.

    首を絞められ 死ぬまで殴られたのです

  • She'd been stuffed into a suitcase and buried underneath the house.

    実の父親と叔父の命令を受けた 3人の従兄弟による犯行でした

  • She had been strangled, she had been beaten to death


  • by three men, three cousins, on the orders of her father and uncle.

    さらに バナズは地元の警察に 5回も足を運んで 助けを求め

  • The added tragedy of Banaz's story

    家族に殺されそうだと 相談に行っていたそうです

  • is that she had gone to the police in England five times asking for help,

    警察は真面目に取り合わず 何の対処もしませんでした

  • telling them that she was going to be killed by her family.


  • The police didn't believe her so they didn't do anything.

    あまりにも多くの若者が 家族や周囲のコミュニティーの中で

  • And the problem with this


  • is that not only are so many of our kids facing these problems


  • within their families and within their families' communities,

    誤解や無関心の憂き目に 遭ったりしていることです

  • but they're also meeting misunderstandings

    自分の家族に裏切られた若者は 社会に拠り所を求めます

  • and apathy in the countries that they grow up in.


  • When their own families betray them, they look to the rest of us,


  • and when we don't understand,

    この映画の製作中 何人かに こう言われました

  • we lose them.

    「ディーヤ これって 単に そういう文化なんだよ

  • So while I was making this film, several people said to me,

    単に この種の人たちが 自分の子供にすることだ

  • "Well, Deeyah, you know, this is just their culture,


  • this is just what those people do to their kids


  • and we can't really interfere."


  • I can assure you being murdered is not my culture.


  • You know?

    似たような生い立ちの 若い女性だって

  • And surely people who look like me,

    住んでいる国で 誰もが与えられる権利を持ち

  • young women who come from backgrounds like me,


  • should be subject to the same rights, the same protections

    次に作った映画では イスラム過激派と暴力に

  • as anybody else in our country, why not?

    ヨーロッパに住む ムスリムの若者の一部が

  • So, for my next film, I wanted to try and understand

    引き寄せられる理由を 理解したかったのですが

  • why some of our young Muslim kids in Europe


  • are drawn to extremism and violence.

    自分が一番恐れていたものと 向き合うことになりました

  • But with that topic,


  • I also recognized that I was going to have to face my worst fear:

    人生の大半を こういう男性に 怯えながら生きてきました

  • the brown men with beards.

    人生の大半にわたって 恐れてきたタイプです

  • The same men, or similar men,

    心底嫌いだと 思っていました

  • to the ones that have hounded me for most of my life.

    それも ずっと長い間です

  • Men that I've been afraid of most of my life.

    それから2年間にわたり 犯罪を犯したテロリストや戦闘員

  • Men that I've also deeply disliked,


  • for many, many years.

    私も元々知っていた 歴然たる事実としては

  • So I spent the next two years interviewing convicted terrorists,

    宗教や政治問題や 植民地時代の爪痕や

  • jihadis and former extremists.

    近年に見られる ヨーロッパの外交政策の失敗なども

  • What I already knew, what was very obvious already,

    全て 背景の一部でしたが

  • was that religion, politics, Europe's colonial baggage,

    それ以上に興味を持って探ったのは 当事者である人間についてで

  • also Western foreign policy failures of recent years,


  • were all a part of the picture.

    若者の一部がなぜ こうした組織に 巻き込まれるのか でした

  • But what I was more interested in finding out was what are the human,

    本当に驚いたのが 心に傷を負った 人間の姿を見いだしたことです

  • what are the personal reasons

    私が探し求め 見つけようとしていたような

  • why some of our young people are susceptible to groups like this.


  • And what really surprised me was that I found wounded human beings.

    はっきり言ってその方が スッキリしたでしょうが

  • Instead of the monsters that I was looking for,


  • that I was hoping to find --


  • quite frankly because it would have been very satisfying --

    過激派に転じた若者も 苦しんでいたのです

  • I found broken people.