time has proven that fooling yourself into believing a lie is the most effective way to deal with things you have no control over

keep listening to the mixtapes they made you

overanalyse every single word you hear

“was this a sign that things were going wrong”

no no, you were the one that cared too hard, not them

stay up every single night staring at your phone

either attempting to gather up the courage to turn these demons

these constant reminders of your loneliness

into nothing more than a bad dream

or praying just for one second

you could feel the warmth of equally returned love

go out for coffee four times a week by yourself

always bring your notebook, never stop writing

leave little comics and thank you notes with your tip

watch them smile as you get in your car

talk down on yourself whenever possible

"my life is shit because I deserve it, right?"

you must have done something really bad

it's nearly impossible for you to cry now

avoid your friends for weeks

even though they’re the only sense of consistency you have left in your life

if they really wanted to see you they’d come

but they won’t (who cares?)

allow yourself to lose interest in the things you love

watch as you begin to take a backseat to the world around you

don’t fight it

become a secondary character in your own motion picture

but most importantly drown every single one of your feelings in old stolen rum

learn to love the taste of it dripping down your throat

find comfort in the warmth coming from your stomach

you’re drinking bottled love now

you don’t need other people to drive away your loneliness

you just needed to find a way to talk to it