But I can handle it though, ya know?

I can handle that people say

Well you know, Gabriel you go up there

And you make fun of yourself

No I don't...

I come up here and I tell you the things that I heard people say

There's a difference you know?

Sometimes I set myself up for jokes

And I don't realize it

Three years ago...

I bought a beetle...

Not even thinking

That's not the joke, shut up

See, I can't even tell you guys a story... Already

I wasn't thinking

I bought the car cause it was affordable, economical

Brand new freaking beetle for like 17 grand

I was like...

First new car

I go to show it off at my friend Martin's house

I thought it was nice

I pull up, ya know...

Martin!!!!

He lives in the hood

I don't get out the car...

Across the street there are these gang members

The kind of gang members...

They don't really get into... ya know, like shooting people stuff like that

They just hang out on the porch and talk a lot of smack

So I'm there in a beetle and across the street I hear this right?

I'm like, Martin!!!!

Over here I hear...

Orale...

Hey, what's up guys? How's it going?

How'd you get in there, Esse?

Hurry up Martin!

Two months later, I go back to pick him up...

Now I've had some time to work on the car, right?

I put some rims on it

Some stickers...

I put a chip in the motor so it goes faster

I thought it was bad, right?

I pull up...

Martin!!!!!!!

Orale...

Nuh uh, I'm not turning around

Aye!

Aye!

I don't see you...

Yoo hoo....

What?!?!?!

Check it out aye?

It's the fat and the furious

I didn't even wait man

Got rid of that car man...

I traded it in

And got myself a big ol SUV

It was nice for a while

This car freaking sucked on mileage though, man

It got 11 miles to the gallon

Oh you cannot be badass in a car that kills gas

Like I kill tacos

You can't...

You can't be at the stoplight

Trying to intimidate other cars, ya know?

What?

What what?!

20 bucks, right there

Hell no man...

But it was kind of cool

It had a GPS navigational system in it

And Onstar which was really cool, ya know?

I'm driving and all of a sudden this girl's talking to me

Right turn, up ahead

In three-quarter tenths of a mile... Left turn

And I'm like, whatever you say baby...