I've been single

let's see here pretty much my whole life

pretty sure it's because I'm unemployed

I live at home with my parents and I

don't have a car

these are all big red flag that's why

don't get much attention on match.com

I do however have a lot of success on

tinder where I am a buff 28 year old

georgetown medical student with a

portion of trust but now i'm a

teenager's on in that awkward phase of

life i'm kind of a mutant creature part

adult parts child but I look back on the

early years of childhood fondly you know

those good old memories like when you

get in the van and turns out the man

doesn't have any candy course nowadays

can you won't cut it we're in the 21st

century you need something like free

Wi-Fi . the Annie that's really all the

kid wants anymore speaking from

experience. and I want to thank my mom

and dad for being so supportive of my

comedy my mom helps me book gigs and my

dad helps me write my material so I like

to think I'm pretty far along in the

entertainment industry because I've got

two things that a lot of people strive

to have I have a Jewish writer and my

agent of the girls to sleep with you

Thank you. I'm really like

don't worry i know what you think in Harry Potter

had the nasty quidditch accident

you know I can't stand sorry sorry let

me emphasize you know what I can't stand

look on the bright side i've never had

too cute disney land

now just I'm just gonna throw a

disclaimer out there if I do get too

energetic please stop me I want to keep

my benefits

otherwise how would I hate the Jacuzzi

I'm joking I'm joking it's a pool

they're always at the cinema seen the

new james bond film of the day and then

it got me thinking you know maybe i

would like to about a girl you know been

james bond but obviously i'm a bit

inhibited ah Mr Bond

I've been expecting you

no lift

but this isn't the first britain's got

talent event have been too i was

actually at live tour in manchester funnily

around two years ago and the stuff they

couldn't be more helpful moving people

out the wake getting into a seat and

then we finally got there the view was

just fantastic and we sat down and my

sister she tapped me on the shoulder

turn around and I'll never forget this

as long as I live

she said Jack we are so lucky are

disabled you cannot take you anywhere

thank you very much I have been jack held goodbye

so a lot of people around here know me

as a pretty friendly and outgoing kid

some means say I'm a little too chidlish

have this thing called ADHD if you don't

know what that stands for its attention

deficit hyperactive oh hey hey hey man

now folks I might be only six but i

think i know a thing or two about girls

an important thing to know about girls is that they

say one thing but always mean another

my mom for instance she always tells me

to call her mom and I came to find out wow

that's not even her real name

here now and I like to open a fire

station recently was there when the

firefighters was giving a demonstration

on fire safety he held a smoke detector

asked anyone knew what is for and i put

my liver said it's what my dad uses to

tell you where the dinner is ready

I work with my grandad the other day to see

one of his friends who just celebrated

his 90th birthday and even tho he is blind

he has always wanted to do a charity

parachute jump so his family arranged him to

do one on his birthday so I say how'd it

go

he said oh it was great but we got a

joke was absolutely 204

exactly flexing so I'm going to leave

you with one last thing what if the

hokey cokey is what it's all about

what an honor to be auditioning in front

of the best judges in the world here at

america's got talent but i have to say

though it took me such a long time to

get here in front of you when i first

got here and saw the line of people

waiting to audition

my father said to me wow this is so much

longer than i expected it to be the last

time I heard those words I was on my

doctor getting a physical

so I have some exciting news I just

had my first date a girl from my class

came over to my house the other day and

as her mother was leaving she told my

friend remember you're allergic to nuts

all i can think even said the tricky

all i can think to myself was well there

go my plans for the afternoon

for a long time I want to be circus

performer and my parents even sent me to

circus camp i learned how to juggle how

to ride a unicycle and I came home from

camp one day telling my mother I wanted

to learn a new trick I wanted to learn

how to be a sword swallower she said no

way will let you do other things

you're not gonna let you be a sword

swallower word so I was upset and I want

to talk to my dad about this he said i'm

not surprised your mother hasn't been

interesting sword swallowing since we got

engaged

I was going to come on the show with my

dogs because dogs do tend to win a lot i

had a spelling test the other day and I said to

my teacher you know what I had it so what

if a can't spell Armageddon it's not the end

of the world I come from a slightly

wealthy area so every night when they do come

home from school I have to cook for your

supermarket to get home because it's a

safe way I like to leave my audience on

a high note

america's got talent this is amazing I

wouldn't miss this for the world I even

turned out a really big job to be here

yeah have you ever seen disney channel

well i was gonna babysit two little

girls i really like Disney Channel

let's talk about that for a minute i am

not a high school graduate

I haven't even been to high school I

don't have a driver's license I can't

even sit in the front seat still on

safety scissors people you are going to

leave your beloved child the one who's

caring on your name to the next

generation with me

my only qualification to be a babysitter

is that I used to be a baby that's like

saying you're sick a lot you want to be

my doctor the host of reality show

you'll want to be President of the

United States