- This isn't anyone's fault. - It's his.

It's a little bit his, but mostly

it's just a very bad day.

It's Valentine's Day. It's my favorite day.

Then pick another day!

Because it's every guy's least favorite day.

Everyone's always disappointed.

Valentine's Day...

is the bully of holidays.

It forces love on people who aren't in love.

- Cupid's freakish. - All right.

No, I'm boycotting Valentine's Day from now on.

Who's with me?

I love you every day.

Today's just an excuse to spend the night in a hotel room.

I was faking it just then.

I think she can still hear you.