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  • -Boss.

  • -Wha....what.....What?

  • -We are approaching Camp Omega, prepare for infiltration.

  • -Uhm...yeah...roger that.

  • No no no...no no no no no!!!!

  • Kept you....

  • KEPT YOU...KEPT YOU...kept you waiting uh??..

  • -Boss...are you okay?

  • -Oh...i'm doing GREAT..

  • You woke me up in the middle of the night for this mission...

  • and i just got a piece of sea rock stuck in my forehead!

  • ...give me a f**king break...!

  • -Your mission is to rescue all the prisoners...

  • I'm sending you the exact location on your iDroid device.

  • -WHAT??? Updating again???

  • Come on! It's the THIRD time today!

  • Ah f**k it, i don't have time for this s*it!...

  • -Don't worry about the map, follow my instructions and i will guide you to the main building.

  • -Ok. I'm inside the perimeter.

  • Uh...listen.

  • I should really get some sleep...

  • They have barracks here....maybe i can

  • -For the last time Boss! There is no time for taking naps now!

  • It's a matter of national security!...

  • -....fine!

  • -Watch out for the spotlights...and if they see you..

  • use the action button to drop on the ground.

  • -Gotcha!

  • DAMN IT!

  • -Huh.....that was close!...

  • Ok Boss, you can proceed.

  • Boss.

  • Boss!...

  • Respond!

  • BOOOOOOOOOOSS!!!!!!!

  • -Should we kill him?..

  • -Naaah....

  • -We were very disappointed about your fail in Cuba, Boss...

  • But i still got faith in you!

  • You are lucky that shark didn't eat other parts of your body....!

  • Welcome to Afghanistan!

  • Your mission here is quite simple...

  • Locate and rescue Miller from the soviets.

  • Is that clear?

  • -You have a new tool in your arsenal...

  • The Fulton Recovery System.

  • You can use it to retrieve resources.

  • Use it with parsimony since it's very, very expensive for us.

  • -Ok Taco.

  • WHAT???!

  • I...i mean....oTACOn...

  • uh.....O...o..Ocelot......

  • ...Ocelot?

  • Ocelot.

  • ENOUGH!!!!

  • They say that you are a hero on the battlefield...

  • Don't let me down this time...

  • NOW GO!

  • Let the legend come back to life!!!

  • Thank god they still make these....

  • -H.Q....i'm in position.

  • -Miller is held on the second floor of that building but the guards petrolling the area

  • are too active right now...

  • You can use your phantom cigar to make time pass faster...

  • using the darkness as your tactical advantage.

  • -Sounds like a good idea. How does it work?

  • -That's a secret....all we can say is that it's equipped

  • with a miniaturized Ecuadorian lady...

  • -All right...let's give it a shot.

  • -H.Q....beginning the infiltration, no guards in sight.

  • WHAT THE HELL???

  • H.Q, respond!

  • H.Q!??

  • uh.....H.Q?....

  • -BOSS??? Is that you???!??

  • BOSS?

  • -Yes, ready to roll.

  • -We thought you were DEAD!

  • Miller was killed and the soviets left Afghanistan!

  • HOW LONG did you smoke that cigar????

  • ......UUUUHH

  • -HEY!

  • NICE BEARD, HIPSTER!!!!

  • -This is your last chance Boss....don't screw this up....

  • We got intel of a very valuable v.i.p. held hostage in this base.

  • His identiy is unknown. Go and rescue him using the Fulton system.

  • -Don't worry H.Q, nothing can go wroing this time.

  • -We hope so....but we cannot take any risks...

  • so we sent you a partner.

  • JESUS?

  • -WHAT!?? No! Her name is Quiet.

  • She's a highly trained sniper.

  • H.Q out.

  • So.....a-hem....can't talk huh?...

  • All right...let's see...

  • You will go this way...and cover me from the hill

  • I'll take this route on the right...

  • ...wait....

  • what the?....

  • HEY!!!

  • These game designers need to chill out a little bit!!!

  • Anyway....time to go now.

  • Oh! And....hey...

  • One last thing...

  • BE QUIET!!!

  • -FREEZE!!! -FREEZE!!!

  • I'M SORRY!!!!!! I'M SORRY!!!

  • I'M SOOOOO SORRY!!!!!

  • -Boss wait....

  • You are approaching a "no flexing zone"

  • You cannot proceed without a proper equipment...so...say goodbye to your pecs for now...

  • -See you later little fella...

  • One day you'll be strong like me...

  • -Disgusting!!!...

  • -We are sending your gear by airdrop but remember, from this point on, you are on your own.

  • -Uhmmmm......send another one please?...

  • Yup...that's.........that's the one.

  • Mmh.....i see many patrols in the area...i suggest using C.Q.C to take them down one at a time.

  • -DONE.

  • -DAMN IT BOSS!!!! You only have one Fulton left!!!!

  • Don't waste it or you will not be able to rescue the target!!!!

  • -WHOOPS.......my bad....!

  • -(Jesus Christ who f**king hired this IDIOT!...)

  • -That's a big one....you might wanna use your enflatable decoy to distract him.

  • -All right!

  • -I'm too old for playing games.....c'mon now!...

  • -Look at my pecs!

  • -Look at my pecs!

  • -Quiet...

  • -I'm gonna need your help for taking down these two guards with a synchronized shot.

  • -NEVERMIND!

  • Uhm?

  • -H.Q. I have the hostage secured.

  • -Good, now identify the target and proceed with the extraction!

  • Uhm?

  • -What was that sound Boss???

  • Proceeding with the extraction now.

  • -Boss hurry up! The chopper is waiting!...

  • Use your last Fulton!

  • We are running out of time!

  • COME ON BOSS!!!! What are you waiting for!???

  • -HEY! A-hem....uhm....BIG FAN but....uh.....

  • Gotta go!!!....

  • -BOSS!!!!!! Where's the prisoner!!!??

  • -Uhm........unfortunately.....

  • ...he didn't make it....

  • -Then WHY there's a wolf in mother base, HUH????

  • -Uuuuuhm......well, look at the bright side man!..

  • We still have that sheep that i got back in Afghanistan....

  • RIGHT???...

  • *grunts in pain*

  • -Uhm!....I should to this kind of stuff WAY more often!!!

  • -Uhm??

  • -Bitch.

-Boss.

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B1 中級

MGS V フルトン・ペイン(MGS 5 幻の痛みのパロディ (MGS V: The Fulton Pain (MGS 5: The Phantom Pain parody))

  • 540 27
    王俊涵 Oscar に公開 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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