I tried other dating websites before,

and could never find a match. and i never did

Honestly? I was about to give up.

Never in a million years did I think I'd ever find him.

Well, with giveupandsettle.com, that can all end today!

Hands down the best dates I ever had.

They sent me more matches than I could ever need!

They showed me the way, and I've finally found him.

Here at giveupandsettle.com, we believe there's someone

in the world that is perfect for you,

and we're here to help you get over the fact

that you're never gonna meet that person.

(inspirational music)

We hate each other so much.

I can't even look at him 'cause I hate his face.

We're not even gay!

And we both are.

With our highly advance matchmaking system,

known as the Personality Aptitude Placement Enrollment

Research by Algorithmic Groupings,

also known as PAPERBAG,

we will find you a near perfect match within seconds.

I searched "gamer" and "girl",

and got a 50% match!

I hate snakes, but I did ask for a man that was charming!

I was always into the shy and quiet type,

and that's exactly what I got.

I typed in how smart, successful, and good looking I am

on other dating websites, and still never found a match!

First try on giveupandsettle.com?

Perfect match!

I typed in black girls as my preference.

But I'm not gonna lie--I'm not the best speller.

So I wasn't surprised when I showed up to my first date

and saw nothing but a black grill.

I'm not picky. I just asked for the hottest match they could find.

Our love will continue to burn brighter than e--

Nothing wrong with a black match.

She still smokin'!

People used to tell me there should be violins playing

for me at all times because I was such a sad person.

That's why I went on to giveupandsettle and asked for someone

cheerful, optimistic, violin-free.

Almost a perfect match!

I got a chairfull of domestic violence for me!

Close. Enough!

(grunting)

We all know there's a lot of fish in the sea,

but there's also a lot of people on land.

You don't have to resort to fish yet!

Just sign up to giveupandsettle.com and find

the settling soulmate you never even knew you wanted.

We promise you you will not regret it unless you do.

It's completely free, money-back guarantee,

so what have you got to lose?

Sign up, give it a try.

You might get a virus.

Giveupandsettle.com. We'll see you there.

See for yourself and find your perfect match today.

It's fast, it's fun, it's not a real site.

Giveupandsettle.com.

Teehee!

So thank you guys again so much for watching.

If you want to see last week's video, click the one on the left.

If you want to see bloopers and behind-the-scenes,

click the one on the right.

And if you want to go to giveupandsettle.com,

click the one on the bottom and find your perfect match today!

Day...day...day...day...day...day.