Trump, you know he always -

"I'm an Alpha Male and what we do is - "

" - in the 21st Century, is we tweet."

Oh, God that's sweet - (That's actually kinda nice)

Ahhhh well at least he's owning it

Might be yours - but it's definitely not 'head' hair

If he treated the bloody country like that

I just wanna see a good - like a well timed gust of wind -

- just go "Whoo" - (just blow it all away)

He's admitting a fault there, so there's a slight hope -

- for his personality

What? What is this about?

Okay that's good, right, he's got a good policy there -

- he's right, in fairness I'd agree with him.

He's like a sassy gay best friend -

- out of a nineties teen movie.

Say's the man who's had more wives than a -

- church!

He's flirting with Robert Pattinson - yeah -

- maybe he wants to be with Robert Pattinson.

And cheated on him like a DOG

Do dogs cheat on people, do they?

That looks like my dog playing fetch with that stranger -

- my dog would never cheat on me like Kristen Stewart

He's not being politically correct -

- but then he's saying he is being politically correct - (He's the Riddler, isn't he?)

He's just a little brat, he's just a little like

I can see what you're doing - yeah

Then saying "I wouldn't say that, because I'm being politically correct."

You just did!

It is kinda funny though, if - like, I mean

Unattractive woman - (Like he can talk! Come on!)

"I don't agree with you political viewpoint" -

- and then he's like "Yeah well you're ugly!"

I knew it!

He's an idiot. He's an absolute like...

Where does he get this from?

"Global warming was created by the Chinese - "

" - I'm gonna invent U.S. global warming."

"Global warming for Americans, by Americans!

You kinda feel sad for him though don't ya?

I don't feel sad for him

The hunger games isn't far off people

Donald Trump doesn't believe in global warming.

If a man is able to put on a fresh pot of coffee every day -

- I don't feel sorry for him. Because that's rich.

Ohhh this - oh no - this is the - so -

Ahhh for fu -

A civil society, like the bus I got into town -

- like the shops we went to - (My school, my college,)

It's the first half of his tweet, he's getting somewhere -

- and then he just swerves the car off the road -

- and drives into mental land.

But it's also really sexist against men -

- like men are so unintelligent like you can't put them in a room with a woman without them losing all control

"Of course if you put men and women together - "

" - some people are gonna get raped, what did you expect to happen?"

He's proof of evolution though, he did come from monkeys

What are you downing monkeys for?

Monkeys are intelligent animals.

He could be the most powerful human being -

- on the PLANET - in less than a year

That hair could be ruling the world! Do you know what I mean -

- those tweets could be like -

"And it's independence day today," and he just writes -

"F*ck off everyone, I'm away."