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BUT I THOUGHT...
( APPLAUSE )
BUT LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, IT'S
SPRING, THE FIRST FULL DAY OF
SPRING, AND MARTHA STEWART HAS
ALREADY GOT AN ANKLE BRACELET
TAN LINE.
( APPLAUSE )
VERY NICE.
YOU KNOW MARTHA STEWART IS
UNDER HOUSE ARREST.
AND THERE'S A 24-HOUR
SURVEILLANCE TEAM MONITORING
MARTHA'S WHERE ABOUTS.
NOTHING YET ON AL QAEDA.
( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )
BUT WE GOT MARTHA RIGHT WHERE
WE WANT HER.
HOW MANY OF YOU FOLKS HEARD
THE CONGRESSIONAL HEARINGS ON
STEROIDS?
ONE CONGRESSMAN SAID THAT
BASEBALL CANNOT BE TRUSTED,
AND I WAS THINKING, WELL, NO,
NOT LIKE YOU CAN TRUST
CONGRESS.
( APPLAUSE )
OF COURSE NOT.
WELL, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
IT'S MARCH MADNESS.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
AND LOTS OF UPSETS.
ROBERT BLAKE NOW ADVANCES TO
FACE THE SCOTT PETERSON JURY.
( APPLAUSE )
SEE HOW THAT GOES.
( LAUGHTER )
THE L.A. JURY POOL IS BUSY,
NOW IT'S ON TO ACQUITTING PHIL
SPECTER.
AND CBS IS, THIS IS EXCITING
NEWS, CUBA IS ALREADY PLANNING
A NEW REALITY SHOW.
WHO WANTS TO MARRY ROBBER
BLAKE?
PAUL, PABLO, SHAFFER!
( APPLAUSE )
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, WELCOME
TO THE PROGRAM.
BEFORE WE START I JUST WANT TO
MENTION A COUPLE OF THINGS.
THIS WON'T TAKE TOO LONG.
LAST WEEK MY FAMILY AND I WERE
INVOLVED IN A LITTLE LEGAL
ACTIVITY.
AND FORTUNATELY EVERYTHING
TURNED OUT FINE, BUT I WANT TO
JUST TAKE A SECOND HERE TO
THANK SOME PEOPLE.
( APPLAUSE )
THE LEGAL INVESTIGATION,
CRIMINAL ACTIVITY, I WANT TO
THANK F.B.I. SPECIAL AGENT JIM
WILSON, F.B.I. SPECIAL AGENT
AARON VAN HOFF, TEE ON THE
COUNTY SHERIFF ANDERSON,
ATTORNEY JOE KOBEL AND THE
GREAT PEOPLE OF CHOTEAO,
MONTANA, THEY HAVE ALWAYS MADE
ME AND MY FAMILY ENTIRELY
WELCOME AND AS THOUGH IT WERE
HOME AND THAT'S HOW WE THINK
OF IT.
AND THERE WE GO.
( APPLAUSE )
LET ME TELL YOU WHO'S ON THE
PROGRAM TONIGHT, LADIES AND
GENTLEMEN.
OH.
YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING
ABOUT?
THE LOVELY SANDRA BULLOCK.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
SHE HASN'T BEEN HERE IN A
WHILE.
SHE IS IN A NEW MOTION PICTURE
CALLED MISS CONGENIALITY 2,
ARMED AND FABULOUS.
>> Paul: YES SHE IS
( APPLAUSE )
>> Dave: IT OPENS THURSDAY.
AND OH MY GOD TONIGHT, LADY
AND JAED, ANOTHER WAY TO
DESCRIBE TONIGHT'S SHOW, BABE
CITY.
AM I RIGHT?
GWEN STEFANI.
>> Paul: YES INDEED.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
WHAT A SONG.
THERE IT IS.
>> Dave: THAT'S THE BIG SHOW
FOR TONIGHT.
AND BECAUSE IT IS MARCH
MADNESS, IRWANT TO JUST TELL
YOU ONE THING.
I HAVE SO MUCH TO TELL BUT
WHAT HAPPENED LAST WEEK, BUT I
CAN'T.
>> Paul: YOU CAN'T.
>> Dave: JUST TAKE IT FROM ME,
AND GOD FORBID, I DON'T WANT
TO ELABORATE ON THIS, BECAUSE
WE NEED KNOW PEOPLE IN THIS
WORLD HAVE MUCH MUCH MUCH
WORSE DIFFICULTY THAN I EVER
WILL IN MY LIFE, THANK GOD.
BUT THIS STUFF IS FASCINATING.
THESE F.B.I. GUYS, THEY KNOW
EXACTLY WHAT THEY'RE DOING.
>> Paul: THEY DO, EH?
>> Dave: YEAH.
>> Paul: GOOD TO HEAR IT.
( APPLAUSE )
>> Dave: AND THE TETON COUNTY
SHERIFF, WHAT A GUY THIS IS,
TREMENDOUS.
THIS IS LIKE THE REAL DEAL.
AND YOU NEVER SEE WHAT THESE
PEOPLE DO BECAUSE THEY'RE
ALWAYS, YOU KNOW, HIDING AND
SPEAKING AROUND.
THEY'RE UNDERCOVER, OR EATING
DONUTS, THAT'S WHAT WE THINK.
THAT'S WHAT WE THINK.
BUT WHEN YOU SEE WHAT THEY
ACTUALLY DO, IT'S TREMENDOUS.
AND THEY'RE COMPLETELY SERIOUS
AND DEADLY EARNEST, AND YOU
DON'T WANT TO CROSS THEM,
DON'T EVEN POKE 'EM.
>> Paul: NO. DON'T DO THAT,
NO.
THANK GOD EVERYTHING WORKED
OUT OKAY.
>> Dave: EVERYTHING IS FINE
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
ANYWAY, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
BECAUSE IT'S MARCH MADNESS, WE
HAVE A TRADITION, AND WHEN I
SAY TRADITION I MEAN THAT WE
DID IT ONCE ABOUT FIVE YEARS
AGO.
IT'S PAT FARMER AND HE'S UP
THERE ON THE ROOF OF THE ED
SULLIVAN THEATER BUILDING,
TURN ON THE THING.
HI, PAT, HOW ARE YOU, NICE TO
SEE YOU.
( APPLAUSE )
PAT FARMER, OUR STAGE HAND,
PAT FARMER, AND WHAT IT IS,
YOU'RE GOING TO DROP THE BALL
INTO THE BASKETBALL NET DOWN
THERE ON 53rd, STREEL, I ABOUT
60, 70 FEET.
>> ABOUT 90, DAVE.
>> Dave: FOUR OR FIVE YEARS
AGO YOU ACTUALLY DID, I
BELIEVE WE HAVE THE VIDEOTAPE
OF YOU MAKING THAT SHOT
SUCCESSFULLY, AND I THINK IT
WAS YOUR SECOND TRY.
>> THAT'S RIGHT.
>> Dave: THIS IS IN I THINK
2001, SOMETHING LIKE. THAT IN
HONOR OF MARCH MADNESS, THERE
IT GOES, I GOOD.
AND AS I RECALL, YOU WERE
INDUCTED INTO THE BASKETBALL
HALL OF FAME BECAUSE OF THAT
SHOT, IS THAT CORRECT?
>> THAT'S RIGHT, DAVE.
>> Dave: YOU ATTENDED THE
BASKETBALL INDUCTION
CEREMONIES AND IF PEOPLE GO UP
THERE, WHERE IS IT LOCATED BY
THE WAY?
>> SPRINGFIELD, MASS.
>> Dave: THEY WILL SEE THE PAT
FARMER EXHIBIT, CORRECT?
>> PRETTY AMAZING.
>> Dave: WE THOUGHT AGAINST
OUR BETTER JUDGMENT THAT WE
WOULD TRY IT AGAIN TONIGHT,
AND THERE'S NO CHANCE YOU'LL
MAKE IT TONIGHT, THERE'S?
>> NO.
>> Dave: IS IT JUST ME, OR IS
PAT LOOKING MORE AND MORE LIKE
CLINT EASTWOOD.
( APPLAUSE )
ALL RIGHT, PAT, LET ME RUN
THIS DOWN FOR YOU.
TEMPERATURE OUT THERE, A
COMFORTABLE 48 DEGREES,
HUMIDITY 58%.
BAR METRIC PRESSURE STEADY,
WIND FROM THE NORTHWEST AT 8
MILES PER HOUR, VISIBILITY
VIRT WELL UNLIMITED.
SUNRISE CAME UP AT 5:48 THIS
MORNING, SUBJECT SET 6:09,
HIGH TIDE 5:51, LOW TIDE 7:42,
MOON NEARLY FULL, SO THERE YOU
GO, THERE ARE YOUR WEATHER
CONDITIONS.
YOU WANT TO TAKE A SHOT NOW
PAT?
>> SURE.
>> Dave: HERE WE GO, 90 FEET,
PAT FARMER TRYING TO DUPLICATE
SOMETHING ALMOST IMPOSSIBLE.
THERE IT IS, THERE'S SHOT
NUMBER ONE.
WOW, RIGHT THROUGH?
CONGRATULATIONS.
>> Paul: REALLY, DID HE MAKE
IT?
>> Dave: NO, NO.
ALL RIGHT, TRY IT AGAIN, PAT.
SO ALREADY WE'RE INTO NEW
TERRITORY, BECAUSE LAST YEAR
BY NOW YOU WERE PACKING AND
YOU DRIVING HOME.
>> THAT'S RIGHT.
>> Dave: I THINK YOU'RE TRYING
TOO HARD.
>> I'LL TRY TO CUT DOWN ON
THAT.
>> Dave: TAKE SOME DEEP
BREATHS NOW, COUPLE OF DEEP
KNEE BENDS, LOOSEN UP.
OKAY, GIVE IT A SHOT.
PAT FARMER, LADY AND GENTLEMEN,
OUR SALUTE TO MARCH MADNESS.
HE SHOOTS... OH!
WE'RE GOING TO GIVE YOU A
COUPLE OF SECOND TO CATCH YOUR
BREATH AND GET SOME GATORADE
AND RELAX, AND WE'LL BE RIGHT
BACK.
THIS IS VER
FARMER.
WE'RE NOT DONE, IF YOU THINK
WE'RE DONE YOU'RE NUTS.
SO, I ASKED ONE OF THESE
F.B.I. GUYS...
( LAUGHTER )
SEE, I'M NOTHING IF NOT
CURIOUS, I GOT A MILLION
QUESTIONS, AND I SAY WHAT ARE
YOU, YOU KNOW RUBBER HOSE A
GUY LIKE THIS?
>> Paul: YOU SAID THAT?
>> Dave: YES, BECAUSE I WANT
TO KNOW ABOUT INTERROGATION
TECHNIQUES, BECAUSE WE HAVE
STAFF PROBLEMS HERE.
( LAUGHTER )
>> Paul: I TRY MY BEST.
>> Dave: NO, I'M NOT POINTING
FINGERS.
I THOUGHT WELL MAYBE I CAN
PICK UP SOME TIPS FROM THE
F.B.I., AND I HOPE I'M NOT
REVEALING SECRETS, BUT HE SAYS
YOU KNOW WHAT WE DO, WE TRY
AND WAKE THEM UP, AND WE FEED
THEM BALONEY SANDWICHES.
>> Paul: AND THAT BRINGS OUT
LPDS THAT GETS A CONFESSION?
>> Dave: VERY EFFECTIVE.
SOMETHING ABOUT THE SODIUM IN
THE BALONEY.
>> Paul: I SEE.
( LAUGHTER )
>> Dave: BOY, THEY HAD THE BIG
BASEBALL STEROID HEARINGS IN
WASHINGTON, OUR NATION'S
CAPITAL.
DID YOU SEE THIS?
OH, MY GOD, IT COULDN'T HAVE
GONE WORSE, TROUBLE REALLY
BROKE OUT, IT WAS LIKE THE
SECOND DAY OF THE HEARINGS.
WATCH WHAT HAPPENED.
>> IF HE DOESN'T CLEAN UP ITS
OWN ACT, ARE YOU IN FAVOR OF
FEDERAL LEGISLATION?
( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )
>> Dave: YOU SEE THAT?
>> Paul: I MISSED THAT.
>> Dave: HEY FRGS PAT, ARE YOU
STILL OUT THERE?
WANT TO TRY IT AGAIN?
WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING
WRONG?
>> I THINK THE PROBLEM IS THE
HEIGHT, DAVE.
>> Dave: THIS IS CERTAINLY
PLAYING HELL WITH YOUR
PERCENTAGE, ISN'T IT?
>> YES.
>> Dave: ALL RIGHT.
JUST TRY ANOTHER ONE.
I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS, BUT
YOU WORK ON. THAT NOW IT'S
TIME FOR A SEGMENT CALLED
GEORGE W. BUSH TALKS DIRTY.
GEORGE W. BUSH TALKS DIRTY.
TAKE A LOOK.
>> I'VE NEVER SEEN ONE QUITE
SO LONG.
( LAUGHTER )
>> Dave: WHAT EXACTLY IS HE
TALKING ABOUT?
THE OTHER THING I DON'T THINK
I'LL EVER GET TIRED OF SEEING
MY HOUSE ON TELEVISION WHILE
I'M IN MY HOUSE WATCHING
TELEVISION.
YOU CAN'T BEE THAT, BOY.
PAT, WHAT DO YOU THINK, YOU
WANT TO TRY ONE, BECAUSE WE
REALLY NEED A BIG PAYOFF HERE,
YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?
>> I JUST HAD THE GATORADE
DAVE, I'M GOOD.
>> Dave: I DON'T THINK YOU'RE
TRYING.
DO YOU CARE, DO YOU REALLY
CARE, PAT?
>> YEAH.
>> Dave: THAT LOOKED LIKE IT
ALMOST CAME BACK UP THROUGH,
IS THAT RIGHT?
>> THAT WAS CLOSE ENOUGH.
>> Dave:, NO IT'S NOT CLOSE
ENOUGH, WE'RE NOT NEARLY
FINISHED, COME ON, IT'S NOT
IMPOSSIBLE.
STATISTICLY IT'S NOT
IMPOSSIBLE.
ALL RIGHT, TRY IT AGAIN.?
>> I THINK I NEED THEM MAYBE.
>> Dave: I THINK. SO BEFORE
THE PROGRAM OUR ANNOUNCER ALAN
KALTER CAME TO ME AND SAID HE
HAD SOMETHING SPECIAL THAT
HE'S PREPARED FOR US TONIGHT
AND IF WE HAVE A COUPLE OF
MINUTES, AND WE CERTAINLY DO,
HE'D LIKE TO SHARE IT WITH US
TONIGHT.
ALAN, GO AHEAD.
>> THANK YOU VERY MUCH, DAVE.
I'M PLEASED TO DEBUT A NEW
SEGMENT ENTITLED ARE YOU
( BLEEP )
KIDDING ME.
( LAUGHTER )
BE THE'S SEGMENT IS TORN
STRAIGHT FROM THE HEADLINES.
TAKE A LOOK AT THIS CLIP.
>> PEOPLE OF THE STATE OF
CALIFORNIA VERSUS ROBERT BLAKE,
WE THE JURY IN THE ABOVE
ENTITLED ACTION FIND THE
DEFENDANT ROBERT BLAKE NOT
GUILTY OF THE CRIME OF FIRST
DEGREE MURDER OF BONNIE LEE
BAKE LIST.
>> ARE YOU
( BLEEP )
KIDDING ME!
BACK TO YOU, DAVE.
( APPLAUSE )
>> Dave: THANKS, ALAN.
GOOD WORK.P SOON AS
WE GO.
HOW MANY BALLS DO WE HAVE?
>> OH, ABOUT TEN MORE.
WE'RE GOING TO NEED THEM.
>> Dave: THINK YOU COULD TOSS
ONE ONTO THE ROOF OF ROSELAND
OVER THERE.
>> SURE.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>> Dave: WOW.
LOOK AT THOSE PEOPLE DOWN
THERE, LOOKS LIKE WE GOT A
BUNCH OF NAVY SEALS ON THE
STREET.
IS SOMETHING GOING DOWN?
>> THEY SEEM TO BE AMUSED BY
THIS.
>> Dave: GIVE IT A SHOT THERE
AT THE BASKET AGAIN.
>> LITTLE TO THE RIGHT.
>> Dave: WE ASK THE GUY TO DO
ONE SIMPLE THING!
THE LOVELY SANDRA BULLOCK,
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
( APPLAUSE )
GEE, THAT LOOKS GOOD.
HOW ABOUT THAT?
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
HOW ARE YOU?
>> I'M REALLY GOOD.
HOW ARE YOU, BETTER NOW?
>> Dave: I'M FINE.
LET ME ASK YOU A QUESTION.
SEEMS TO ME THAT YOU HAVEN'T
BEEN HERE IN QUITE SOME TIME,
PROBABLY ABOUT TWO YEARS.
>> YEAH, YOU'RE CORRECT.
AM I BEING INTERROGATED?
SANDWICHES ARE COMING OUT.
ALL RIGHT.
SORRY.
I KNEW YOU HAD THE WHOLE THING
SET UP.
OKAY, CONTINUE.
>> Dave: I KNEW YOU HAVEN'T
LEFT SHOW BUSINESS, I KNEW YOU
WERE STILL IN SHOW BUSINESS,
BUT YOU HAVEN'T BEEN IN MOVIES,
AND --
>> I WASN'T SURE IF I WAS LIKE
NOT DONE.
>> Dave: YOU KNEW YOU WERE
GOING TO MAKE MOVIE?
>> KIND OF.
YEAH, OKAY.
>> Dave: WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN
DOING THE LAST COUPLE YEARS?
>> I WAS PRODUCING, BUT I TOOK
TIME OFF.
WE HAVE A TELEVISION SHOW
TO RUN A 5 K IN THE
SAME PLACE, BUT I WAS IN THIS
COURT CASE IN AUSTIN WHICH.
>> Dave: IS THIS RELATED TO
THE BUILDING ACTIVITIES, YOUR
CONSTRUCTION PROBLEMS?
>> YES.
>> Dave: BRIEF US ON THIS,
TAKE US BACK AND TELL US --
>>OU WERE ACTUALLY INVOLVED
IN IT IN A VERY BIZARRE WAY.
>> Dave: I HOPE HELPFULLY.
>> YEAH.
>> Dave: BECAUSE I KNOW PEOPLE
AT THE F.B.I..
I CAN GET A LOT OF STUFF
STRAIGHTENED OUT.
( APPLAUSE )
>> NO, I BUILT THIS HOUSE, AND
I'M GOING TO BE VERY CAREFUL
IN HOW I SAY THIS.
IF ANYONE IS NAY LAWYER IN
HERE JUST LET ME KNOW WHAT I
SOME SAY AND YOU CAN JUST
ERASE IT.
I BUILT A HOUSE THAT WASN'T, I
WAS NEVER ABLE TO MOVE INTO
IT.
IT TOOK ABOUT FIVE YEARS TO
GET TO THE LEGAL SYSTEM
PROCESS.
WE WENT THROUGH THE PROCESS.
>> Dave: COULD NOT MOVE IN
BEE OF SHODDY
CONSTRUCTION?
( LAUGHTER )
>> BUT DURING THE DEPOSITION
PROCESS YOU KNOW, YOU PUT ON
YOUR LAWYER CLOTHES, WHICH
EVERYONE HAS IN THEIR CLOSET
OR YOU THINK HAVE YOU IN YOUR
CLOSET, SO I'VE GOT WHITE
BUTTON DOWNS SKIRT SETS,
THINKING I LOOK CUTE.
BUT THEY SAID, WELL, WE NEED
TO BRING INTO EVIDENCE DAVID
LETTERMAN'S SHOW.
I WENT WHAT!
WE MIGHT HAVE TO DEPOSE DAVID
LETTERMAN.
THEY GO IF YOU CAN GET DAVE
LETTERMAN TO SHOW UP, THAT
WOULD BE FANTASTIC.
Dave: NO.
>> I DIDN'T THINK SO.
BUT IT WAS LITTLE ODD.
>> Dave: YOU GOT IT ALL
SETTLED?
>> AS MUCH AS YOU CAN GET IT
SETTLED.
>> Dave: AND THE PROBLEM WAS
THE CONTRACTOR WAS A CROOK AND
A THUG?
( LAUGHTER )
HE WAS SWINDLING.
IT'S FRAUD, HE MISREPRESENTED
EVERYTHING, HE WAS SWINDING
MONEY FROM YOU.
AM I RIGHT?
>> SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME OUT
HERE.
>> Dave: ANYWAY, THE NIGHTMARE
IS NEARLY OVER?
>> YES, NEARLY.
NEARLY, YES.
>> Dave: BOY, YOU LOOK
TERRIFIC.
>> FEEL GOOD, DAVE, I FEEL
GOOD.
>> Dave: LET ME ASK YOU A
COUPLE OTHER QUESTIONS.
IT'S COME TO MY ATTENTION THAT
YOU ARE SPENDING TIME WITH A
FELLOW THAT I ADMIRE A GREAT
DEAL, HE'S ON TELEVISION, HAS
HIS OWN SHOW, MONSTER GARAGE,
JESSE JAMES.
IS THAT ANY TRUTH TO THAT?
( LAUGHTER )
I LIKE THIS GUY, YOU KNOW WHY
I LIKE THIS GUY?
HE'S AN OUTLAW.
REALLY.
>> Dave: YEAH.
HE'S LIVING ON THE EDGE.
THIS IS A GUY WHO GETS IT ALL
DONE, YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING,
NO LEAVING ANYTHING AT TABLE.
>> LAUNDRY, ALL DONE, DISHES,
DONE.
THAT'S AWESOME.
>> Dave: DO YOU SPEND TIME
WITH THE GUY?
>> REALLY?
>> Dave: DO YOU?
( LAUGHTER )
HOW DID YOU MEET, IF YOU DID
MEET.
>> MEET WHOOM.
>> Dave: JESSE JAMES, HOW DID
YOU MEETS FPL IF YOU MET HIM?
( LAUGHTER )
IF YOU DIDN'T MEET HIM, DON'T
TELL ME.
>> UM... YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I'D
LOVE TO TELL YOU THINGS?
ON AIR ESPECIALLY?
>> Dave: YES, YES.
>> AND I LOVE BEING A SPORT IF
POSSIBLE, IF IT'S HUMOROUS
I'LL DO THAT, ME LOOKING
UNCOMFORTABLE IS FUNNY, I'LL
DO THAT.
SO AT THIS MOMENT RIGHT NOW IS
HELPING THE SHOW IN ANY WAY...
I'M HAPPY ABOUT THAT.
( APPLAUSE )
>> Dave: BUT LET'S JUST, LET'S
JUST FOR THE SAKE OF THIS
COUPLE NEXT MINUTES SAY THAT
YOU DON'T KNOW HIM.
>> OKAY.
>> Dave: AND WE'LL JUST TALK
ABOUT HIM.
>> OKAY.
>> Dave: FIRST OF ALL, THERE'S
HIS PICTURE RIGHT THERE.
LOOK AT THIS GUY.
THIS IS WHAT YOU WANT, I MEAN
THIS IS...
( LAUGHTER )
I'M TELLING YOU SOMETHING, IF
I LOOKED LIKE THIS, NOBODY,
NOBODY WOULD BE BOTHERING ME
ABOUT ANYTHING.
>> YEAH.
( APPLAUSE )
YOU DON'T NEED THE F.B.I. WHEN
YOU HAVE THAT.
>> Dave: THERE WOULD HAVE BEEN
NO INVESTIGATION IF I LOOKED
LIKE THIS.
AND HE KNOWS ALL ABOUT
MOTORCYCLES AND KNOWS HOW TO
BUILD STUFF AND HE'S A STAND
YUF GUY, HE'S BEEN ON THE SHOW,
HE HAD SOME KIND A THING OUT
THERE HE WAS DRIVING AROUND
IN.
>> BASKETBALLS?
>> Dave: NO, I DON'T KNOW WHAT
IT WAS.
AND HIS NAME IS JESSE JAMES
AND THAT'S COOL, EVERYTHING
COOL ABOUT THIS GUY.
I DON'T KNOW WHY YOU WOULDN'T
WANT TO SPEND TIME WITH HIM.
( LAUGHTER )
YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?
LET'S TRY IT THIS WAY.
DO YOU RIDE MOTORCYCLES?
>> I HAVE RIDDEN ON THE BACK
OF ONE, I HAVE A DIRT BIKE.
YOU KNOW.
I HAVE TO MAKE THE NOISE WHEN
I RIDE IT TOO.
>> Dave: IT DOESN'T MAKE THE
NOISE ON ITS OWN?
>> IT DOES, BUT ODDLY MY VOICE
HELPS ACCELERATE.
AND I'M OUT THERE...
>> Dave: WHEN YOU RIDE ON THE
BACK OF A REGULAR MOTORCYCLE,
WHO'S DRIVING?
( LAUGHTER )
ANYTHING THERE?
>> WELL, I'M A VERY SAFE, SAFE
ORIENTED PERSON, SO WHO EVER
THE DRIVER IS I WOULD HOPE HAD
MUCH EXPERIENCE ON THE ROAD,
USES THEIR TRAFFIC SIGNALS
LIKE THIS WHEN THEY TURN.
>> Dave: A SOLD I CITIZEN.
>> WEARS THE FULL GEAR,
DOESN'T GO WITHOUT HELMETS,
YOU KNOW.
YOU KNOW, A SAFE DRIVER FOR
THE BIKE.
>> Dave: ALL RIGHT.
WE'LL LET THAT GO.
BUT I JUST HOPE IT IS
HAPPENING BECAUSE I LIKE THE
IDEA OF THIS.
>> DO YOU?
>> Dave: BOTH SIDES OF THIS I
FIND EXCITING.
>> Dave: UNDERCOVER IN THE OLD
AGE HOME.
>> YES, THERE'S A LOT OF STUFF
GOING DOWN IN OLD AGE HOMES.
>> Dave: A GUY LIKE ME, A
REGULAR GUY IN A SUIT, VERY NO
APPEAL FOR YOU WHAT SO EVER.
IT'S GOT TO BE THIS, IS THAT
RIGHT?
( APPLAUSE )
I COULD BE WORKING AT CENTURY
21, NOT A CHANCE IN HELL!
>> I'M SURE THIS GENTLEMAN
OWNS A SUIT.
>> Dave: PROBABLY DOES.
>> I'M SURE SDHE, AND A NICE
ONE.
SUCH AS YOURS, MAYBE THE
SLEEVES EVEN.
( APPLAUSE )
>> Dave: THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
I THINK THIS IS GOING TO BE
SOMETHING.
OUR NEXT GUEST IS A GRAMMY
AWARD WINNING SINGER WHOSE
DEBUT SOLO CD SOLD OVER 3
MILLION COPIES.
IT'S CALLED LOVE, ANGEL, MUSIC
BABY.
PLEASE WELCOME BACK TO THE
PROGRAM, GWEN STEFANI.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
♪♪
>> ♪ UH-HUH
THIS IS MY
♪ ALL THE GIRLS STOMP YOUR FEET
LIKE THIS
♪ A FEW TIMES I'VE BEEN
AROUND THAT TRACK
♪♪ SO IT'S NOT JUST GOING TO
HAPPEN LIKE THAT
♪ BECAUSE I AIN'T NO
HOLLABACK GIRL
♪ A FEW TIMES I'VE BEEN
AROUND THAT TRACK
♪ SO IT'S NOT JUST GOING TO
HAPPEN LIKE THAT
♪ BECAUSE I AIN'T NO
HOLLABACK GIRL
♪ I AIN'T NO HOLLABACK GIRL
OOH OOH
♪ THIS IS MY
THIS MY
♪ OOH OOH
THIS IS MY [NO AUDIO]
♪ THIS MY
I HEARD THAT YOU WERE TALKING
♪ AND YOU DIDN'T THINK
THAT I WOULD HEAR IT
♪ PEOPLE HEAR YOU
TALKING LIKE THAT
♪ GETTING EVERYBODY FIRED UP
SO I'M READY TO ATTACK
♪ GONNA TAKE YOU OUT
THAT'S RIGHT
♪ PUT YOUR POMPOMS DOWN
GETTING EVERYBODY FIRED UP
♪ A FEW TIMES I'VE BEEN
AROUND THAT TRACK
♪ SO IT'S NOT JUST GOING TO
HAPPEN LIKE THAT
♪ BECAUSE I AIN'T NO
HOLLABACK GIRL
STEFANI, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.
LOVE AIPG GEL MUSIC BABY.
THIS IS GOING VERY WELL FOR
YOU.
>> YOU KNOW WHAT, IT IS LIKE
MAGIC, I'M HAVING SO MUCH FUN
WITNESS.
I'VE NEVER BEEN IN THE CHAIR
BEFORE.
THIS IS THE FIRST TIME IN THE
CHAIR.
>> Dave: SINCE YOU WERE HERE
BEFORE YOU GOT MARRIED, IS
THAT CORRECT?
>> I'VE BEEN MARRIED ALMOST,
TWEL, TWO AND A HALF YEARS,
SOMETHING LIKE THAT.
>> Dave: HOW IS THAT GOING,
ARE YOU STILL A NEWLYWED.
>> I'M STILL LOVING IT.
HE'S HOT, YOU KNOW.
( APPLAUSE )
>> Dave: WHAT CAN YOU TELL US
ABOUT THIS GUY, BECAUSE, YOU
KNOW, SANDRA BULLOCK WOULDN'T
TELL US ANYTHING ABOUT...
>> OH, SHE WOULDN'T TELL YOU
ANYTHING, OH, SECRETS.
>> Dave: CAN YOU MENTION HIS
NAME?
>> HIS NAME IS GAVIN ROSTELL,
HE'S A SINGER,, HE'S BEEN IN A
MOVIE CALL CONSTANTINE.
I'M LIKE PROMOTING HIM, BUT HE
JUST GOT A NEW MOVIE THE OTHER
DAY, SO WE'RE LIKE ALL YEA!
>> Dave: AND IN TERMS OF
MUSICAL ABILITY, WHO IS
STRONGER?
( LAUGHTER )
>> YOU KNOW WHAT, IT ALMOST,
WE'RE SUCH DIFFERENT MUSE DAHL
GENRES, AND NOW IT'S CRAZIER
BECAUSE I'M GOING IN THIS
DANCE RECORD.
>> Dave: NO COMPETITION.
>> NO.
>> Dave: GENTLEMEN, YOU LOOK
TREMENDOUS.
>> THANK YOU.
( APPLAUSE )
>> Dave: I NOTICED YOU HAD
KIDS IN THE MARCHING BAND, ARE
THOSE ACTUAL MARCHING BAND
KIDS OR JUST GOONS YOU PUT IN
MARCHING BAND --
>> THEY ARE ACTUAL MARCHING
BAND, I THINK THEY'RE COLLEGE
KIDS.
>> Dave: YOU WERE PROBABLY
NEVER IN A MARCHING BAND.
>> YES, I WAS.
I FAKED AND IT I PLAYED PICOLO
FAKELY, IT WAS...
>> Dave: BUT SEEMS TO ME LIKE
IF A HIGH ENOUGH PERCENTAGE OF
PEOPLE IN THE BAND ARE FAKING
IT, THEN YOU'VE GOT NOTHING
GOING ON AT ALL.
>> YOU'RE NOT GOING TO HEAR IT
ANYWAY, I SPEND MOST OF THE
TIME IN THE DRUM ROOM MAKING
OUT WITH MY BOYFRIEND.
>> Dave: WHOA!
LOOK OUT.
BUT IT'S EXCITING, TO SEE THEM
DMOM AND WE WERE ABLE TO USE
THEM.
>> THE SONG IS, WROI THE SONG
WITH, FROM THE NEPTUNES, AND
IT WAS THE LAST SONG, I DIDN'T
WRITE MY HISTORY DON'T MESS
AROUND WITH ME SONG, AND HE
JUST CAME UP WITH THE SPEED
AND I WAS LIKE NO WAY.
IT WAS A MAGICAL MOMENT.
SO I'M EXCITED THAT IT'S A
SINGLE AND THAT IT'S FINALLY
COMING OUT.
>> Dave: YOU SMELL GREAT TOO.
>> THANK YOU.
( LAUGHTER )
>> Dave: AND YOU'RE ALSO
DESIGNING CLOTHES, DID YOU
DESIGN SOMETHING OF WHAT
YOU'RE WEARING HERE?
>> THIS IS ACTUALLY VINTAGE.
BUT I DO HAVE A CLOTHING LINE.
>> Dave: THIS IS, YOU KNOW,
THIS IS ABOUT ALL YOU WANT.
EASY.
>> I'M LIKE, AM I GOING TO
REALLY WEAR SHORTS ON THE
CHAIR LIKE IN THE THING, BUT
HERE I AM.
>> Dave: WHAT KIND OF THINGS
WOULD YOU DESIGN, DO YOU
DESIGN?
>> WELL, I HAVE A CLOTHING
LINE CALLED LAMB, AND IT
STANDS FOR LOVE ANGEL MUSIC
BABY, AND I'VE DOING IT FOR
ABOUT TWO AND A HALF YEARS AND
I'M WORKING ON MY FIFTH
COLLECTION, GOING TO DO THE
FIRST NEW YORK FASHION SHOW
COMING UP.
>> Dave: SO THIS IS BIG TIME
STUFF THEN?
>> IT'S REALLY EXCITING.
( APPLAUSE )
THANK YOU, WOW, THANKS.
IT'S LIKE, I THINK, MUSIC FOR
ME IS MY FIRE, LIKE IT KIND OF
IS THE FUEL.
BUT DESIGNING FOR ME IS JUST
ANOTHER, I DON'T KNOW,
CREATIVE WAY TO EXPRESS
MYSELF.
>> Dave: YOU KNOW, PAUL,
MUSICAL GENIUS AND ALSO FOR A
WHILE HAD HIS OWN BAG LINE.
>> Paul: HI A BAG LINE, YEAH,
WE WERE DOING SO WELL, WE WERE
THE HOTTEST SELLER.
BUT I HAD A PARTNER WHO WAS
STEALING ME BLIND, I HAD TO
FORGET THE WHOLE THING.
( LAUGHTER )
AND WE WERE RED CARPET, I WAS
GOING TO CALL IT RED CARPET
READY.
EVERYBODY IS OBSESSED WITH THE
RED CARPET.
THESE BAGS WERE RED CARPET
READY AND I WOULD HAVE BEEN
ECORD,.HERE WITH NEW THE SHOW.
BUT WE'RE FLIRTING ABOUT IT.
NOW IT'S LIKE GETTING EXCITING
AGAIN TO DO ANOTHER RECORD.
>> Dave: YOU HAVE TREMENDOUS
LEGS.
>> THANK YOU.
THANK YOU.
( APPLAUSE )
GREAT LEGS, THAT'S FUNNY.
>> Dave: SO IT'S LOVE ANGEL
MUSIC BABY.
THERE IT IS.
THREE MILLION COPIES ALREADY
SOLD, IT A MONSTER.
>> THANK YOU FOR SAYING THAT.
>> Dave: ALWAYS A PLEASURE,
THANK YOU VERY MHANKS TO SANDRA,
SHE HAS A PRAND NEW MOVIE
OPENING UP FRIDAY CALLED ARMED
AND DANGEROUS, BABES AND
FABULOUS AND WHATEVER ELSE.
>> Paul: I'LL BE THERE.
>> Dave: AND GWEN STEFANI, AND
I DON'T WANT TO PAIN THIS WITH
TOO FINE A BRUSH, BUT I FEEL
LIKE IT MY RESPONSIBILITY TO
TELL PEOPLE OUT THERE WHAT'S
GOING ON.
SHE HAS TREMENDOUS LEGS.
TREMENDOUS.
( APPLAUSE )
>> Paul: YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO
TELL US, WE WERE ALL OVER HER.
>> Dave: THERE'S NOTHING IN IT
FOR ME, I JUST HAVE TO LET
PEOPLE KNOW.
>> Paul: WE KNOW.
>> Dave: TOMORROW ON THE
PROGRAM, JESSICA ALVA WILL BE
HERE,.
BRIAN GREEN, HE'S WRITTEN A
BOOK ABOUT THE FABRIC OF THE
COSMOS, THAT WILL BE A LOT OF
LAUGHS.
( LAUGHTER )
AND QUEENS OF THE STONE AGE.
NOW LET'S GO BACK UP TO THE
RAF OF THE ED SULLIVAN
THEATER.
THIS IS IT, PAT.
HAVE YOU ADJUSTED YOUR SHOT?
>> YES.
I THINK RAPID FIRE MAYBE I
THINK I NEED.
>> Dave: I'M BEGGING YOU,
PLEASE, WE NEED SOMETHING HERE
ON VIDEOTAPE.
WE DON'T HAVE MUCH TIME.
>> ALL RIGHT.
>> Dave: THERE IT IS, THAT'S
IT, OH!
MAN, YOU SHOULD JUST RETIRE
AND SPEND THE REST OF YOUR
LIFE COACHING KIDS.
PAT FARMER, LADIES AND