We went back to the Unit. We argued... Z: Do you really think that I want to hear about your sick obsession?

C: It's true, Zainab. We were a couple. We were together until just before Christmas.

Z: What, so all this time, while he was planning on marrying Amira? C: He wanted to tell her! He was going to call it off.

Z: Yeah but he didn't, did he, Christian? Because it never happened, none of it.

C: Do you know what, you believe what you want to believe.

Z: Yeah, well, I believe you probably did try and seduce him. It would be typical of people like you. C: People like me?

Z: Yes. Promiscuous. Predatory. Thinking that you can just thrust yourselves on all and sundry.

What was it? Never had a Pakistani before? C: Don't be so ridiculous.

Z: No, you see a closed door, you give it a push, and when it slams shut in your face, you concoct this miserable fiction.

C: He kissed me first. Z: Oh, you are sick, Christian. C: And we fell in love.

Z: You don't know the meaning of the word. C: He's gay, Zainab. Syed. Is. Gay!

Z: You, you're a liar! You liar! I don't believe a word you say, Christian!

C: If you don't believe me,

you talk to him.

Z: You come near me, or my family again, and I will tear you to pieces!

D: Where have you been? Hold on, it's not the baby, is it? Z: No, no: of course not.

D: Alright, you okay? Z: Never better.

L: Alright. Z: Thank you.

Q: Don't worry, we will wait for you mother. I've been to shaadi's that are four hours late.

T: Um, can I just say... that you look... absolutely beautiful.

A: You're such a cutie.

C: I need a cab. I'll be waiting opposite the Minute Mart on Bridge Street. Walford to Heathrow. Fine.

S: What is it, Christian? C: Your mother came 'round. She went crazy, attacked me.

I've told her everything. I am so sorry, Sy.

C: Change of plan. Take me there.

Z: You want to come in? You pay.

Background: Fiver! Twenty quid!

A: More.

Background: More! Yes! No. More! Better, much better.

A&Z: More!

S: I'm cleaned out.

Background: Congratulations, congratulations.

S: Mum, can we talk, please. Z: Just smile.

M: Oh, hello.

Z: Is it true?

S: Is what true? Z: Don't toy with me, Syed. I saw your face when I got out of the car. He must have rung you.

S: Who?

Z: Christian.

S: Well I don't know what he's told you.

Z: So what did he just phone you for a quick chat, then? 'How you doing, Syed, hm? On the way to your wedding.

Oh, by the way, I just told your mother that you were a h-

a homosexual.'

S: He shouldn't have said that.

Z: Because he's lying? Or because he's breaking a confidence?

Is he lying?! S: Yes!

Z: So you and he... he made it all up?

Syed!

S: Not all. I have been... tempted.

Z: Life, is always throwing up temptations.

What sets us above is that we resist them.

I knew he was lying. I knew it. And for him to torture me with this deceit on this day of all days?

Oh, I tell you, you wait until I get ahold of him, I am going to ring his neck! S: Mum, I...

Z: Do you know, that he actually fabricated an entire relationship?

That he just.. he, he... made up this sick, imaginary affair in his twisted, perverted, mind of his.

And this wasn't just some top-shelf fantasy, oh no, he used the word 'love', Syed.

He actually believes that he loves you. How sick is this man? S: Don't talk about him like that!

Z: Syed...

S: I'm gay, mum.

I'm gay and I love him.

T: Contact lenses? A: Zulekha would like them.

T: Really?

Yeah, look, um, it's good of you to pimp your best mate, or whatever, but she is way out of my league.

And even if she wasn't, I'd probably muck it up. Mainly because I've never kissed a girl before, but, well, no probably...

A: I'll do you a deal. You put those contacts in and I'll give you a lesson.

B: A mixed-sex nikah? And the walima on the same day? You're being very daring, Masood.

M: Yeah well danger is my middle name. S: What's wrong with having them both on the same day, anyway?

B: Well, traditionally the marriage is consummated between the two ceremonies. A: And how do you know it won't be?