Why are there always people outside my window?

There's always people outside my window

and it's like how can I even talk?

How can I even make a video?

And I've been trying to make a video.

Are they gone?

They're gone.

(sighs) Well hello, everybody.

My name is Tyler Oakley

and my voice is a little hoarse right now

because yesterday I went out.

I didn't mean to go out,

but then I went out.

I went out at noon because it was Sunday fun day.

And people do that.

I guess adults do that.

So I went out, and I was like you know what,

I'mma just order a soda

with a little lime and so if people come up to me

they're like, "Why aren't you drinking?"

I'll be like, "I'm drinking."

But I was actually not drinking,

but then somebody offered me a shot.

And then I started drinking

because I was like you know what,

drinking responsibly is fine.

But then I was out until two,

from noon 'til two,

and by two I mean not 2pm, I mean 2am.

So it was like a fourteen hour day of shenanigans.

So I've kinda lost my voice.

But I wanted to make a video anyway

because it's time for another Q and slay.

Let's do it.

Do you watch anime?

Sometimes I do.

I'm not a fanime, if you will,

but I do like "The Spirited Away" type of movies.

But I've never gotten into a show.

So if there's a show I should get into, let me know.

Does your poop float or sink?

Honestly, I think it depends on the day.

(laughs) I was gonna say,

I could go in there and come back out

and let you know.

Am I gonna do that?

Be right back.

(smooth jazz music)

OK, so I think, you know when you do a study

and there's a whole bunch of results,

but then there's one outlier,

I think today was the outlier

because I have been drinking coffee.

And you know what coffee does.

Makes you shit, so it's not looking pretty,

what I just did, I just did a bad thing.

What I did in that bathroom was not Christian.

To answer the question,

just like life, my poop sometimes floats

and sometimes sinks.

There are ups and there are downs,

and sometimes you can't make it above water,

but you know what,

at the end of the day,

you just have to consider that we all

get flushed down the toilet that is life.

Hashtag shitspiration.

Why do you love making YouTube videos?

Because I get to hang out with you guys.

I feel like this is my opportunity to connect

with you guys and tell you about really cool things

that are helping change the world,

or do things for the better.

Like sometimes I do my fundraiser with you.

You guys have donated hundreds of thousands of dollars

for a charity that I love and support.

We are at $370,000.

We are so close to reaching $500,000,

so if you haven't donated yet,

it's the perfect birthday gift,

and I would love you forever if you did.

Let me know when you donate

and I will give you some love.

Do you smell like beef?

I don't think so.

No, today I don't smell like beef,

but I will say like a decade ago

when I worked at McDonald's, I stank like beef.

I would come home from work,

and I would be like eww, I reek like a big ol'

plate of beef.

I did not like that I would always reek of beef.

What is your favorite song to listen to in the shower?

It changes every single day.

If you wanna know what songs I am currently loving,

I have two links.

This is not how normal humans say two.

I have two links. One, two.

One link that is going to be below

for my jams playlist on Spotify.

One link that is gonna be below for my

chill playlist on Spotify.

So if you're looking to get pumped up

or if you're looking to have a quiet night in

doing studying stuff,

you can get both of those below.

The links to those are completely free.

Follow me on Spotify

and you can always know when my favorite songs

are added to my playlists.

What is the biggest unreasonable goal

that you have for 2015?

I don't like saying things are unreasonable.

I want things, all things to be achievable for anybody.

And it may not be achievable by 2015,

maybe that's the thing,

but I do believe all of my goals and my dreams are doable.

If I work hard enough, nothing is unreasonable.

Except this itch, good Lord.

Do you keep the outtakes of your videos?

No, because they're boring.

Here, this is an example of an outtake of my video.

I don't do outtakes, OK.

This is what it is between cuts.

Here, enjoy this.

(whistling)

Whistle.

Yes, I have the pizza place in my phone.

Do you want a whole video of that?

If you do, push the thumbs up button,

maybe I'll upload an entire video

of me just like.

Did your mother eat the placenta when she birthed you?

I don't think so.

If anybody was gonna eat that shit,

Lord knows it would have been me.

I am always starvation station rhythm nation.

And I'm like, you gonna finish that?

That's literally me at my birth.

I'm like, did you drop that?

Five second rule?

Fine, I'll eat that placenta.

And honestly, if she did,

that should be her Twitter bio.

Make a cooking with Tyler Oakley 10 second bit.

OK, hold up.

Siri, where can I get some orange chicken?

- [Siri] I didn't find any restaurants

who's reviews mention orange chicken.

- Siri, fuck you.

- [Siri] Now, now.

- (laughs)

OK, so I think that's all I have for you guys today.

If you wanna see my latest video,

click right there.

If you wanna hear the latest pod cast,

click right there.

If you want to get some merch

and become my person of the week,

click right there.

But yeah, I love you.

Push the thumbs up button

and I will love you even more.

And I will send you some orange chicken

because Siri's not gonna.

But I will talk to you guys later.

OK, bye!

Siri, where can I get some orange chicken?

- [Siri] I didn't find any recipes--

- Somebody outside my window just screamed, "Google it."

Honestly, I have never been so disrespected like this.

I came here to have a good time

and to get some orange chicken.

Please don't cuss me out.