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Last November I had the privilege
of being invited, along with President Henry B.
Eyring and Bishop Gerald Causse, to attend
a colloquium on marriage and family at the Vatican, in Rome.
In attendance were religious representatives
from 14 different faiths, from six of the seven continents,
all who had been invited to express their beliefs in what
was happening to the family in the world today.
Pope Francis opened the first session of the assembly
with this statement: "We now live
in a culture of the temporary, in which more and more people
are simply giving up on marriage as a public commitment.
This revolution in manners and morals
has often flown the flag of freedom,
but in fact it has brought spiritual and material
devastation to countless human beings, especially
[to the poor] and most vulnerable.
...
It is always they who suffer ... most."
In referring to those of the rising generation, he said,
"It is important that they do not give [up on] themselves
over ... the poisonous mentality of the temporary,
but rather be revolutionaries with the courage to seek truth
and lasting love, going [on] against the common pattern;
this must be done."
This was followed by three days of presentations
and discussions with religious leaders addressing
the subject of marriage between a man and a woman.
As I listened to the widest imaginable variety
of worldwide religious leaders, I
heard them agree completely with each other and express support
for one another's belief on the sanctity of the institution
of marriage and of the importance of families
as the basic unit of society.
I felt a powerful sense of commonality and unity
with them.
There were many who saw and expressed this unity,
and they did so in a variety of ways.
My favorite one was a Muslim scholar from Iran
who quoted two paragraphs verbatim of our very
own proclamation on the family.
During the colloquium, I observed
that various faiths and denominations and religions
are united on marriage and family.
They are also united on values and loyalty and commitment,
which are naturally associated with family units.
It was remarkable for me to see how
marriage- and family-centered priorities cut across
and superseded political and economical and religious
differences.
When it came to love of spouse, hope and worries
and dreams for children, we are all the same.
It was marvelous to be in meetings
with worldwide presenters as they universally
addressed the feelings of the importance of marriage
between a man and a woman.
Each of their addresses was followed by testimonies
by other religious leaders.
President Henry B. Eyring gave the final testimony
of the colloquium.
He bore a powerful witness to the beauty
of committed marriage and to our belief
in the promised blessings of eternal families.
President Eyring's testimony was a fitting benediction
to these special three days.
Now, you may be asked, "If the majority
felt that similarly of family, priorities, and belief,
if all religious faiths and religions essentially
agree on what marriage should be,
and if they all agreed on the value that
should be placed on home and family relationships,
then why are we any different?
How does The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
distinguish and differentiate itself
from the rest of the world?"
Here is the answer: While it is wonderful to see and feel
that we all have such in common with the rest of the world
in regards to families, only we have the eternal perspective
of the restored gospel.
What that restored gospel brings to a discussion on marriage
and family is so large and so relevant that it cannot be
overstated.
We make it a subject of eternity.
We take the commitment and the sanctity of marriage
to a greater level because of our belief and understanding
that families go back before this earth was
and they will go forward into eternities.
This doctrine is taught so simply,
powerfully, and beautifully by Ruth Gardner's text
of a Primary song, "Families Can Be Together Forever."
Pause and just think for a moment about Primary children
all over the world singing these words in their native tongues
at the top of their lungs, with enthusiasm and love a family
can invoke: "Fam'lies can be together forever through
heav'nly Father's plan.
I always want to be with my own family,
[for] the Lord has shown me how I can."
The entire theology of the restored gospel
centers on families and on the new and everlasting covenant
of marriage.
In The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints,
we believe in premortal life, where we all
lived as literal spirit children of God, our Eternal Father.
We believe that we were and still are
members of His family.
We believe that marriage and family ties
can continue beyond the grave, that marriage performed
by those who have the proper authority in His temples
will continue to be valid in the world to come.
Our marriage ceremonies eliminate the words "'til death
do us part" and instead say "for time and for all eternity."
We also believe that strong traditional families are not
only the basic unit of a stable society, a stable economy,
and a stable culture of values, but that they are also
the basic unit of eternity and the kingdom
and government of God.
We believe that the organization and government of heaven
will be built around families and extended families.
It is because of our belief that marriage and families
are eternal that we, as a Church,
ought to be leaders and participate
in worldwide movements to strengthen them.
We know that it is not only those
who are actively religious who share common values
and priorities of lasting marriages and strong family
relationships.
A great number of secular people have
concluded that a commitment to marriage and a family lifestyle
is the most sensible, the most economical,
and the happiest way to live.
No one has ever come up with a more efficient way
to raise the next generation than a household
of married parents with children.
Why should marriage and family matter--everywhere?
Public opinion shows that marriage is still
the ideal and the hope among the majority of every age group.
Even among the "millennial generation,"
where we hear so much about choosing singleness,
personal freedom, and cohabitation before marriage,
the fact is that strong majorities worldwide
still want to have children and to create strong families.
Once we are married and once we have children,
the true commonality among all mankind
becomes even more evident.
As "family people"--no matter where we live or what
our religious beliefs may be--we share the many struggles,
the same struggles, the same adjustments,
and the same hopes and worries for our children.
As a New York Times columnist said,
David Brooks said: "People are not better off
when they are given [the] maximum personal freedom
to do what they want.
[They are] better off when they are enshrouded in commitments
that transcend personal choice--commitments to family,
[to] God, craft and country."
One problem is, so much of the media and entertainment
that the world shares does not rely on the priorities
and values of the majority.
For whatever reason, too much of television, movies, music,
and Internet present the classic case
of the minority masquerading as the majority.
Immorality and amorality range from graphic violence
to recreational sex.
It is portrayed as the norm and can
cause those who have mainstream values to feel that they're out
of date, of a bygone era.
In such, the media and Internet dominate the world.
It has never been harder to raise responsible children
and keep marriages and families together.
Despite what much of the media and entertainment outlets
may suggest, however, and despite the very real decline
in marriages and family orientation of some,
the solid majority of mankind still
believes that marriage should be between one man and one woman.
They believe in fidelity within the marriage,
and they believe in the marriage vows "in sickness and in health
...
'til death do us part."
We need to remind ourselves once in a while,
as we were reminded in Rome, of the wonderful reassurance
and comforting fact that marriage and family still
have the aspiration and ideals of most people
and that we are not alone in these beliefs.
It has never been more of a challenge
to find a practical balance between employment, families,
and personal needs as it is in our day.
As a Church, we want to assist all
that we can to create and support
strong marriages and families.
That is why the Church is actively participating
and provides leadership in various coalitions
and ecumenical efforts to strengthen the family.
It is why we share our family-focused values
in the media and on social media.
It is why we share our genealogical and extended
family records with all nations.
We want our voice to be heard against all of the counterfeits
and alternative lifestyles that try
to replace family organizations that God Himself established.
We also want our voice to be heard sustaining the joy
and fulfillment that traditional families bring.
We must continue to project that voice throughout the world
in declaring why marriage and family are so important--why
marriage and family really do matter and why they always
will.
My brothers and sisters, the restored gospel centers
on marriage and families.
It is also on marriage and families
that we can unite most with other faiths.
It is around marriage and families
where we find the greatest commonality
with the rest of the world.
It is around marriage and families
that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
has the greatest opportunity to be a light upon the hill.
Let me close by bearing my witness (and my nine
decades on earth fully qualify me to say this)
that the older I get, the more I realize that family
is the center of life.
It is the key to eternal happiness.
I give my thanks to my wife, to my children, my grandchildren,
and my great-grandchildren, to all the cousins and in-laws
of an extended family who make my life so rich--yes,
even eternal.
Of this eternal truth I bear my strongest
and most sacred witness.
In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.