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  • Women earn almost 60% of university degrees in America and Europe.

  • Despite that, women hold only 4.6% of Fortune 500 CEO positions.

  • 80% of women admit to wearing shoes that hurt in an effort to generate the feeling of power and status.

  • Women earn 77 cents for every dollar earned by their male counterparts.

  • That's what she said

  • Power and Purpose

  • I want to talk about being a woman in male-dominated industries, maintaining our femininity,

  • and still having having power and and having that be okay and having that not

  • be something that we have to,

  • A) become masculine to get, or B) become bitchy to get. It's been really

  • interesting to me watching Shabnam and I have kind of navigated those waters

  • because we're meeting with

  • people in the industry and a lot of times I feel like we're discounted, 1) because

  • we're SoulPancake. Our name itself is like, you guys do what again?

  • 2) It's just, we're cute women. Shabnam and I joke with each other like

  • when she wears a blazer, I'm like, alright, you're suited up. We're going to head to this meeting. Or she'll rock

  • on her heels and

  • I think about the things we try to do to arm ourselves with like, the kind of

  • respect we would get if a male counterpart was there and how sad it is.

  • I remember when I was working at MTV. I really never wanted to dress up because

  • I was working on the technical side of things and i was just never taken

  • seriously.

  • Like, ever! Okay, the more boyish that I can be, the more I can kind of, like,

  • dress like that, then maybe they'll take me more seriously.

  • I think it's Susan Sarandon. She said, "Never underestimate the power of a very short,

  • very tight, red dress."

  • I think that's awesome coming from a super bright woman because

  • one of the things I think really sucks in business or

  • just life in general is that often to be taken seriously you have to become

  • mannish or masculine and you see it reflected even in the fashion with the

  • women's movement, like, you have these huge shoulder pads of the eighties because

  • women are becoming men,

  • actually, physically. I still find myself having to

  • wear the power suit or really do the power hair. Which,

  • sometimes, I find a little bit absurd, but it is what it is.

  • Wear a suit. Wear shirts that are high.

  • Don't show cleavage and wear a little longer skirt. Men will take you way more

  • seriously if you dress the part.

  • I was reading Sheryl Sandberg's Lean In book right now about how she talks

  • about how if you're a little girl and you're assertive,

  • you're called "bossy," but boys who are assertive are never given that title.

  • Yeah, they're called leaders. I think in our society one of the worst things is

  • when women are perceived as being bitchy

  • when they're putting their foot down because men can do it all the time and

  • they can say things and

  • it just gets rolled off, you know? and for women it's like, "You're being too soft" or like,

  • "God, don't be- Ooo, someone's in a bad mood," you know? You're like, c'mon!

  • Are you on your period? Yeah. I do have to factor in the way that I present my

  • information,

  • tone, just to be sure to not be accused of having

  • any sort of emotional attachment to the points that I'm trying to make.

  • I was a very nurturing type of a salesperson

  • so I would bring that to the table when I would call on my account

  • where at my male counterparts, we're not doing that.

  • It was really cut and dry and there was not that emotional

  • component in it. You're seeing that women are

  • more and more educated and a lot of times are surpassing men in education,

  • but the challenge, at least in my mind, is that that hasn't been brought

  • enough of a change

  • because we've continued to value the same things, so you can have people who are

  • dressed different and people who look different,

  • but if you continue to propagate the same values, then you haven't really

  • changed things. I worked at Yahoo!

  • and I worked in that corporate, dog-eat-dog world.

  • and who are the meanest people? Women. One of the unspoken

  • things is sometimes, that other women can be

  • roadblocks to success. I've met women where I'm like dude why are you, like,

  • they're just mean, you know? and there's a little bit of hostility. So, what we

  • do?

  • We start to be helping people up a ladder

  • rather than kicking the ladder from them and we start to

  • encourage women to have someone under you. My husband said something really interesting:

  • "It's never good to be the only person who's good at what you do,"

  • and I said, "Well, why not? That sounds awesome!"

  • because you should always have someone

  • coming up to take your place under you. It challenges you,

  • it keeps you on your game, you learn from teaching other people.

  • and as women I don't think we take that posture because

  • we think there's only one place and for some reason there's very few places

  • for us at the top and I think we have to re-

  • structure the way that we think about that.

  • There's enough. Like, there's enough success and love and money

  • and friendship and orgasms for all of us! I think

  • there's this really huge competition element when it comes to

  • other women

  • and we sort of lose sight of- we're a community.

  • You know? The worst thing we can do is cut each other down and the best thing

  • we can do is lift each other up.

  • I love taking care of others. I have this thirst for

  • being able to nurture people and take care them. I feel really whole

  • when I can do that. I kinda feel like the mother of the office

  • because I'm the office manager and I absolutely love it.

  • I feel like I I'm really needed. I feel like a whole person, like, I'm using

  • my strengths in the right way, is a really wonderful feeling.

  • I love that because I'm what you described sounds like really maternal

  • characteristics

  • and it's so cool that you can take that and turn it into business

  • and still being treated like that maternal

  • feeling, you know? It can translate to either one. I think women should really

  • embrace being women

  • and bring your femininity to the table. I kinda feel like

  • inherently, like femininity really means like owning who you are

  • and as long as you're coming from an honest place, like bitch you're not, like people can't

  • really discredit

  • talent.

  • "In the future, there will be no female leaders.

  • There will just be leaders." -Sheryl Sandberg

  • What if, for a moment, we surrender everything we think we are?

  • What if I'm not a woman? Black, American, short,

  • voluptuous, poor? What if I evolve beyond all the things I claim to be?

  • What would be left?

  • Who would I be? What would I do? What

  • would I seek? I believe that in the mind of God,

  • Jesus, Mohammed, Buddha, spirit, universe, whatever force you claim,

  • nowhere was smallness a part of the plan. You are not meant to be mindless.

  • You are not meant to be a slave to an environment that does not grow you.

  • Open up and let the world love you. This is your birthright

  • and something in you knows this, but getting to it is the sludge you must pass

  • through to access

  • everything that's next. I used to allow the passive aggression of others

  • to shame me into silence. Tried to resist internalizing it, but subconsciously

  • would wonder

  • why I wasn't good enough. I used to hide my art because I was ashamed of it.

  • Too much truth in these stanzas, not enough structure and sugar coating, not enough

  • whisper in my woman for the comfort of men, see, we are raised

  • to stay in our place, to not shake things up. This is continually reinforced, but

  • every person who has ever made a difference on this earth at some point, spoke up,

  • put in work. Every one of them had to learn how to get back

  • up and I am reminded. I'm reminded of things I know in the strangest of places

  • a trampoline is where I found my grace. Somewhere between bounce and land,

  • watch these tiny children run and fall and get back up.

  • Watch a grown man flip and fold. Watch my friend perfect a trick.

  • My eyes swallowed them whole. My spirit craved the thing my body was most

  • afraid of: the freedom

  • in flight. See, I wanted to flip, to allow this neglected

  • body to exist in free fall, but I was afraid of falling,

  • afraid I would look stupid, afraid someone from across the way would notice

  • the big of

  • me trying something not meant for my size. I was paralyzed,

  • couldn't allow myself to let go enough to fall head over heels, so I bounced.

  • In a single square, in a room full of trampolines,

  • I stayed in my place, but there is no power in that.

  • No beauty in the fear of feeling this body resist the spirit. I am

  • more than the limitations I've set for myself. I am more than what the world

  • tells me I can be. I am not just this skin,

  • not just the things I do, I'm a culmination of every thought in the most

  • high which makes my existence holy and,

  • and what if I tried on worthy for size? See, I've wasted

  • so many hours worried. Sick to my stomach about frivolous matters and avoided my

  • truth.

  • What if fear didn't control me? What if I didn't let my past define me?

  • What then would fill the space of where my fears lived?

  • I think knowing this would. See, I know now that I was

  • I was born to write, to express,

  • to remind the timid to be brave, so I will not behave,

  • will not settle into the mundane standard society has set for me

  • as an overweight, black, American woman. I will love myself enough

  • to chase these dreams, to jump for joy

  • to rise in love and fall right out of self-hate because

  • I was born. See, I was born to be great.

  • How do you fight for gender equality?

  • SoulPancake... SUBSCRIBE!

Women earn almost 60% of university degrees in America and Europe.

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That's What She Said(彼女が言ったこと)|パワーと目的 (That's What She Said | Power and Purpose)

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    Eating に公開 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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