Carly.

Carly.

Keep it together.

You can do this.

Stay with me Carly

Carly...

Carly

Carly, are you there?

You're here now.

There's no avoiding it.

Where?

The first step. Reminiscing and retracting

I don't wanna get up.

That's fine. You can lay here all day.

You can cry all night.

You are allowed to do all the things you've promised to yourself that you'll never do.

Like listen to an old voice message to hear his voice

Sorry I missed your call. I'm in subway right now. But I'll call you back later, okay?

Or wish him message you. Just so you know, he was thinking of you too.

But at the same time, when she wouldn't. Because it would only make you miss him more.

And you know you shouldn't, but… you text him. Maybe even call him.

You've fight it. But you lose.

You watch the sappy rom coms.

It's cliché but go ahead. Eat from the crumbs.

I miss everything about him.

What do you miss?

How steady he felt when I hug him tight.

The way he would rest his chin on top of my head.

Sharing his hand felt when he catch me through the crowd.

That look in his eyes when he accidentally ate the last cookies.

Sweety kisses after he worked out which made me cringed every time. But…

now it just make me smile.

I miss it all.

That's okay. You're allowed to. You're supposed to.

It's okay you do look like crap and not caring.

Who do you try to impress anyway.

Do you see him?

Everywhere

Hey. It's okay to purposely avoid all those places in the pain.

You just wanna be alone.

You friend insist on taking you out. But… all you want is

To shut off all the lights.

Curl up in bed and cry some more.

Your friends are try to help by saying:

You can do so much better.

I didn't like him in anyways.

I don't want to hear any of that.

It doesn't help at all.

I just… wanna back in my life.

Or do you just miss the thought of him?

You miss the routine, the comfort, the body, that's all, right?

No. at this point, you just miss him.

And that's okay.

Carly…

Carly. Are you there?

Yeah.

Do you wanna get up?

Actually, I do.

How long was I there?

It doesn't matter. All that matter is that you're ready

For the next step

Release

I'm hungry.

I think you can put some effort into looking sort of decent.

What does that to do?

Brushing your hair? Maybe a little eye shadow. Some blush?

Yea. No. you're right. No blush yet.

Call up one or two of your close friends to catch up.

You're ready to talk a little bit about your ex. But this time with a clear hair.

You might see cute guys for their eyes but nothing stirs inside your heart.

No butterflies, no sparks, no interest.

Because I still miss him. You'll for a while

but at least the urge of contact him or check up become less frequent.

You just have to learn to suppress those urges now.

How long will I be here?

As long as you need to be.

You're up early. -I'm ready.

The next step. Rebuilding.

One day becomes two. Two becomes a week.

Weeks become months. And soon you're ready to prove to yourself that you can live on.

You actually wanna go out. Socialize, meet new people.

You talk, laugh, flirt.

Yes even flirt. Or whatever you call what you just did.

I'm a little rusty. -It's okay. It's been a while.

As long as you're smiling again.

You start doing things toward a better version of you.

Trying the fruit clans. Finally taking that trip to Europe.

Trying yoga for the first time. cutting your hair…

Oh, okay. Nothing too crazy.

Running a marathon, checking out a museum,

cleaning out your old clothes.

You start to see life without him.

Carly.

It was the first time he came over.

I cooked spaghetti and he got a stain on it.

I put it into a wash away.

We ended up talking for hours.

And he forgot it here.

You've made so much progress Carly. Please.

I kept it in the closet as a reminder of that night.

That was almost four years ago.

I thought he was the one.

We both did.

Yeah. It did feel special.

It was.

And it always will be.

Sometimes no matter how hard you try,

something can always hold you back for moving on.

A lingering memory, a false hope.

And you fold back a few steps.

But if you could be strong, you'll finally make it out.

Renewed

The world is brighter, happier, lighter.

That huge weight of pain and fear has been left and all you feel is excitement.

Excitement for what's to come. Excitement for the possibilities.

At this point, it's not even about finding another person to love.

It's about finding who you are as a person. As a human

It's only when you don't have to consider anyone else that you could focus completely on your own life.

And creating the best possible version of yourself.

But there's no harm in smiling back at the cute guy in coffee shop.

Even the strong cry,

when no one's looking

we try

not to be scared on the outside,

but I know that there's strength from the fall,

it's not weak, to be weak at all.