Name: 3 Things That Are Not Your Job
Uploaded: 2022-08-09T17:11:12.000Z
Duration: 4 min 17 s
Description: VoiceTubeの動画で発音を聞きながら英語表現を覚えよう！学べる英語：

We tend to feel responsible for way too much, sometimes things that are bad for us.

Melissa, it's late.  What are you still doing up?

Scrolling through filters and editing this photo.

It's my responsibility to cultivate the perception people will have of me.

Often things that are out of our control...

But he's destructive and addicted to chaos and doesn't take accountability.

It's my responsibility as a woman to rehabilitate a damaged man.

You are currently at 0.7 alcohol blood content level that will send you over the legal limit to 0.8.

The actions of my loved ones are my responsibility.

When I think about the prime messages that have permeated our brains through the media, social obligations and cultural pressures,

I think of three distinct things that we are not responsible for.

One: You're not responsible for anyone else's happiness, but you are responsible for your own.

We get the wrong idea that everyone's experience of us has to be pleasent.

That as friends, we always have to be positive; that as romantic partners, we're responsible for our partner's mood and well-being.

But the truth is everyone's shit is on their side of the street.

Yes, we can be a source of comfort and a sounding board and sympathize with others, but everyone is ultimately responsible for their own happiness.

Except for Michelle, Michelle is responsible for mine.

Two: You're not responsible for anyone's reaction to your boundaries, but you are responsible for setting and enforcing them.

Fair warning here, people who don't benefit from your boundaries are going to get angry when you actually set them.

For any of you who struggle with this kind of work, expect pushback when you finally set and enforce any kind of boundary.

Your hand is right next to it, you can literally reach it yourself.

You're perfectly capable of getting that phone yourself, Anna.

No, I'm not, Michelle. After everything I've done for you, can't you just reach right there and get me my phone?

Okay, I'm busy right now and so I can't do this. I'm gonna set a boundary, I'm not gonna do this stuff for you anymore.

And finally three: You are not responsible your trauma, but you are responsible for your healing.

We all have stories we tell ourselves about our lives, about what kind of people we are, about what kinds of things happened to us,

and it's up to you to figure out which of these narratives are not serving to create the life you wanna lead.

Yes, we are all most likely suffering from intense trauma, after all, you are here on this channel,

but it is up to us to heal ourselves from it, to let it go and to not let it hold us back.

I'm Anna Akana and thank you to the patreons who supported today's video.

And thank you to Squarespace for sponsoring today's episode.