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  • Hello. This is 6 Minute English

  • from BBC Learning English.

  • I'm Neil.  

  • And I'm Rob. It's great that you're

  • here to keep me company -

  • to spend time with me so

  • I don't get lonely -

  • because loneliness is the

  • subject of this programme. It's good to be here, Neil.

  • I think many of us have

  • experienced loneliness at

  • some point. Maybe you've

  • felt lonely because all your

  • friends have gone out for

  • dinner without you, or

  • maybe you've felt lonely

  • just because you don't

  • fit in somewhere. Yes, that's when we sometimes

  • use the expression 'to feel

  • lonely in a crowd'. Well,

  • we'll be exploring if this

  • is a new idea or something

  • humans have always

  • experienced, and along

  • the way we'll be teaching

  • you some new vocabulary. But now I'm here to keep you

  • company, how about a

  • question for me?

  • Of course! Well, one

  • possibly lonely man is

  • Mauro Morandi. He's lived

  • alone on Budelli Island in

  • Italy for many years, but

  • how many years exactly?

  • Is it: a) 6 years,

  • b) 31 years, or

  • c) 44 years? Umm ... 44 years would be

  • tough, as would 31, so

  • I'll go for 6 years. OK, Rob, we'll find out

  • later if that's right.

  • Now, I'm sure we all

  • want to be alone from

  • time to time, to escape

  • the demands of our

  • colleagues or the

  • pressures of real life,

  • but would we really want

  • to be totally alone? Well, I certainly wouldn't.

  • And research has found that

  • prolonged social isolation

  • is bad for us,

  • particularly mentally. It's an interesting topic,

  • and one that the BBC Radio

  • 4 programme Thinking Aloud

  • has been exploring.

  • Its guest, Fay Bound Alberti,

  • Reader in History at the

  • University of York,

  • explained how loneliness is

  • a relatively new

  • emotional state. A state is a condition at

  • a particular time. Let's

  • hear what she had to say

  • about references to

  • loneliness in literature. Well, novels are

  • fascinating, because there's

  • a difference between novels

  • in the 18th Century, when

  • they first came into being,

  • and novels in the 19th

  • Century - in the 18th

  • Century something like

  • Robinson Crusoe, there's

  • not a single reference

  • to loneliness. By the 19th

  • Century novels are

  • full of lonely people

  • and that reflects those

  • kinds of social changes. Give me some examples.

  • What may count

  • as examples? Well, I suppose I'm

  • thinking about if you

  • compare something like

  • Wuthering Heights where

  • you have this desperate

  • desire on the part of

  • the heroine to find love

  • which is bundled up

  • to in this sense of the

  • self not being complete

  • without another, or

  • Tess of the d'Urbervilles.

  • And so Victorian

  • fiction in particular

  • tends to be full of woman

  • who are in search of the

  • significant other and

  • needing to find happiness

  • and an absence of loneliness

  • in the domestic. It's interesting that Fay

  • mentions the story of

  • Robinson Crusoe - about

  • a man living on a desert

  • island - does not mention

  • the word loneliness.

  • But because of a shift

  • in how people behaved

  • and thought in the

  • 19th century - called

  • social change - loneliness

  • became an emotion that

  • was written about

  • in stories. Ah, but loneliness tended

  • to be something affecting

  • women. They were

  • searching for happiness

  • by finding a 'significant

  • other' - a partner, usually

  • a man, who they wanted to

  • marry. How things

  • have changed! Yes, now Fay also went

  • on to talk about how

  • some female authors,

  • like Virginia Woolf,

  • looked for solitude - that's

  • being alone - because

  • that helped them

  • be creative. Even today, being alone

  • gives us headspace and

  • time to think, as long

  • as it doesn't last

  • forever. Anyway, as we

  • mentioned, we've probably

  • all been lonely at some

  • point, and Fay Bound Alberti

  • told the Thinking Aloud

  • programme that loneliness

  • can take many forms. Absolutely, I think that

  • loneliness is something

  • that affects all people

  • but at different times

  • in their lives. I would

  • describe in terms of

  • pinch points - there are

  • times when we change

  • [when we become] when we

  • get married, we become

  • mothers, we get divorced,

  • anything that changes

  • our life might put us

  • under temporary loneliness.

  • When it's a problem is

  • when it becomes chronic. It seems that there are

  • certain times in our

  • lives when we might feel

  • lonely - when we break

  • up with a partner or

  • have a baby and feel

  • isolated, for example.

  • These are moments that

  • Fay describes as pinch

  • points - times in your

  • life where there are

  • difficulties and things

  • slow down or change. We could say loneliness

  • at these times is

  • understandable, normal

  • and temporary. When it

  • becomes a bigger issue,

  • it's what Fay describes

  • as chronic - so,

  • long lasting. And loneliness isn't

  • always obvious to other

  • people, so it's good to

  • check in with friends

  • and family to see how

  • they're feeling and to

  • ask if they re OK.

  • Of course, it would be

  • difficult to check in

  • on Mauro Morandi, who's

  • been living on Budelli

  • Island in Italy for