MAN, IMAGINE PEOPLE JUST TUNING IN NOW, LIKE BIDEN HAS WON,

MAN, IMAGINE PEOPLE JUST TUNING IN NOW, LIKE BIDEN HAS WON,

THEY'RE ALL CELEBRATING AND SOMEONE GETS A TEXT, ST UNDER

みんなでお祝いしてて 誰かがテキストを受け取った STアンダー

CBS IS DOING HONEST HEADLINES, NO WAY.

CBSは正直なヘッドラインをしていますが、ウェイではありません。

BIDEN WON AND HONEST HEADLINES, THIS IS THE GREATEST DAY EVER!

バイデンの勝利と正直なヘッドライン、これはこれまでで最高の日だ!

THIS ONE FROM CBS THAT SAYS FLORIDA MAN JAILED AFTER

これはCBSの報道ではフロリダ州の男が後に刑務所に入ったと言っています。

ASSAULTING 7-ELEVEN WITH SLURPEE.

ASSAULTING 7-ELEVEN WITH SLURPEE.

THAT WAS THE HEADLINE, THE A HONEST HEADLINE SHOULD HAVE READ

これがヘッドラインであり、正直なヘッドラインは読むべきだった。

ASSAULT AND SLATTERY, ONE FROM THE DAILY MAIL THAT I SAS

侮辱とスラッタリー、私は毎日の郵便物からの1つをSASしました。

BOYFRIEND DIVED INTO A FISH TANK TO RETRIEVE AN ENGAGEMENT, THE

ボーイフレンドが婚約を取り戻そうと魚の水槽に潜った。

HONEST ONE SHOULD HAVE READ FOOLISH LOBSTER THOUGHT THIS MAY

HONEST ONE SHOULD HAVE READ FOOLISH LOBSTER THOUGHT THIS MAY

FINALLY BE THE ONE.

FINALLY BE THE ONE.

>> HERE'S ONE FROM NPR READS STUDY FINDS PAINTING EYES ON

>> HERE'S ONE FROM NPR READS STUDY FINDS PAINTING EYES ON

COW'S BUTT CAN SAVE THEIR LIVES.

COW'S BUTT CAN SAVE THEIR LIVES.

THAT IS THE HEAD LINE.

それがヘッドラインです。

THE HONEST HEADLINE SHOULD HAVE READ MAN HAS TO COME UP WITH

正直なヘッドラインは、人間が思いつくべきことを読まなければならないはずです。

EXCUSE AND FAST.

EXCUSE AND FAST。

HERE'S A HEAD IAN FROM "THE NEW YORK POST" AND IT READS

"ニューヨークポスト "のヘッド・アイアンの記事です。

RENAISSANCE PAINTER RAPHAEL GAVE HIMSELF A NOSE JOB IN

RENAISSANCE PAINTER RAPHAEL GAVE HIMSELF A NOSE JOB IN

SELF-PORTRAIT, THE HONEST HEADLINE SHOULD HAVE READ

SELF-PORTRAIT, THE HONEST HEADLINE SHOULD HAVE READ

RAPHAEL DID IT FOR THE GRAM.

RAPHAEL DID IT FOR THE GRAM.

THAT IS A SHAME.

それは恥だ

IT WAS HARD TO BEAT THE THE LAST ONE.

ラストワンを倒すのは大変だった。

HARD TO BEAT THE COW [BLEEP].

HARD TO BEAT THE COW [BLEEP].

>> JUST FUNNY TO IMAGINE THAT SCENARIO OF A GUY DOING THAT.

笑） >> >> 男がそんなことをしている光景を想像するのは、ただのおかしなことだ。

>> James: THAT IS WHY IT IS FUNNY.

>> ジェームズ：それはそれで楽しいです。

THAT IS WHY IT IS FUNNY.

それはそれで楽しいです。

>> JUST THINKING ABOUT THAT GUY PAINTING EYES ON A COW'S BUTT.

>> 牛のお尻に目を描いている奴のことを考えているだけだ。

OH BOY, THEY CAUGHT ME, I NEED AN EXCUSE, THE-- THE LAUGHS COME

OH BOY, THEY CAUGHT ME, I NEED AN EXCUSE, THE-- THE LAUGHS COME

TRAILING IN.

トレイルイン。

>> James: YEAH.

>> ジェームズジェームス: はい。

I WONDER IF YOU COULD UNPACK EVERY HONEST HEADLINE FROM A

誠実なヘッドラインを全て解凍してくれないかな？

COMEDIAN PERSPECTIVE.

COMEDIAN PERSPECTIVE.

>> LET ME KNOW.

>> 知ることができます。

>> James: ALL RIGHT, HERE'S ONE FROM FOX NEWS, AND IT READS

>> ジェームズよし、これはFOXニュースからのものだ

COLORADO ZOO LIVE STREAMS GIRAFFE BIRTH, THAT IS THE

COLORADO ZOO LIVE STREAMS GIRAFFE BIRTH, THAT IS THE

HEADLINE.

HEADLINE.

THE HONEST HEADLINE SHOULD HAVE READ HERE COMES THE HEAD AND THE

THE HONEST HEADLINE SHOULD HAVE READ HERE COMES THE HEAD AND THE

NECK AND THE NECK AND THE NECK.

NECK AND THE NECK AND THE NECK。

BECAUSE GIRAFFES ARE TALL.

BECAUSE GIRAFFES ARE TALL.

>> ONE OF THE TALLER ANIMALS AND SPECIFICALLY IN THE NECK AREA.

>> 背の高い動物の一つで、特に首の部分に特徴があります。

>> James: EXACTLY.

>> ジェームズ全くその通りです。

YOU'RE RIGHT, THE LEGS ARE LONG BUT THERE ARE OTHER ANIMALS WITH

YOU'RE RIGHT, THE LEGS ARE LONG BUT THERE ARE OTHER ANIMALS WITH

THAT AREA OF LEGS T IS REALLY A NECK-BASED ANIMAL.

レッグスTのその部分は、本当に首ベースの動物です。

>> RIGHT, RIGHT, PROCESS OF ELIMINATION, THE NECK IS THE

>> RIGHT, RIGHT, PROCESS OF ELIMINATION, THE NECK IS THE

FUNNY PART, YOU KNOW.

FUNNY PART, YOU KNOW.

>> James: HERE'S HEADLINE COMES FROM ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY

>> ジェームス: エンターテインメント・ウィークリーからヘッドラインが来ました。

T READS GEORGE R.R. MARTIN SAYS-- WILL BE DIFFERENT IN THE

TはGEORGE R.R.マーチンの言うことを読みます--では異なることになります。

BOOK.

BOOK.

>> IT SHOULD HAVE READ GEORGE R.R. MARTIN STILL WRITING "GAME

>> >>GEORGE R.R.R. MARTINがまだ「GAME」を書いていると書かれていたはずです。

OF THRONES" BOOK FOR SOME REASON.

OF THRONES」の本を何かの理由で。

BECAUSE IT'S DONE, WE FEEL LIKE IT IS FINISHED.

終わったから、終わったような気分になる。

>> PEOPLE MOVED ON AFTER THE HBO PROGRAM WAS OVER.

>> PEOPLE MOVED ON AFTER THE HBO PROGRAM WAS OVER.

>> James: BUT HE IS STILL WRITING THE BOOKS.

>> ジェームスだでも、彼はまだ本を書いている。

>> YEAH.

>> YEAH.

>> James: FOR SOME REASON.

>> ジェームス何か理由があって

I THINK THERE IS MORE PEOPLE WATCHING THIS IN THIS ROOM THAN

I THINK THERE IS MORE PEOPLE WATCHING THIS IN THIS ROOM THAN

ARE WATCHING THIS ON TV.

ARE WATCHING THIS ON TV.

(LAUGHTER).

(笑)。

>> Reggie: DEFINITELY.

>> レジー: DEFINITELY.

I MEAN.

私が言いたいのは

>> I THINK WE ARE GOING TO BE ON VERY, VERY LATE AT NIGHT IF WE

>> I THINK WE ARE GOING TO BE ON VERY, VERY LATE AT NIGHT IF WE

ARE ON.

ARE ON.

>> James: YOU THINK THIS WON'T BE ON 12:307.

>> ジェームズ12時307分には出ないと思う？

>> IF BIDEN ON TRUMP GIVES A SPEECH THEY MIGHT GO TO THAT

>> トランプが演説をしたら、その場に行くかもしれない。

BEFORE THEY GO TO YOU, NO INSULT.

彼らがあなたのところに行く前に 侮辱してはいけない

>> YOU ARE A REAL PIECE OF [BLEEP], YOU KNOW THAT.

>> YOU ARE A REAL PIECE OF [BLEEP], YOU KNOW THAT.

(LAUGHTER).

(笑)。

>> James: HERE'S THE HEADLINE THAT COMES FROM CNN AND IT READS

>> ジェームスこれがCNNからのヘッドラインで、以下のように書かれています。

COLLEGE STUDENT SAYS A PROFESSOR TOLD HER NOT TO BREASTFEED

大学生は教授に授乳するなと言われたと言う

DURING ONLINE CLASS.

オンライン授業中。

THAT IS THE HEADLINE.

これがヘッドラインです。

THE HONEST HEADLINE SHOULD HAVE READ IF HE FINDS THAT

THE HONEST HEADLINE SHOULD HAVE READ IF HE FINDS THAT

DISTRACTING TRY BEING MILKED BY A TINY LITTLE PERSON.

DISTRACTING TRY BEING MILKED BY A TINY LITTLE PERSON.

>> HERE'S ANOTHER HEADLINE FROM CNN AND IT READS DISNEY PLUS NOW

>> これはCNNの別のヘッドラインで、DISNEY PLUS NOWと書かれています。

LET'S YOU BINGE WATCH WITH FRIENDS VIRTUALLY.

LET'S YOU BINGE WATCH WITH FRIENDS VIRTUALLY.

THAT IS THE HEADLINE.

これがヘッドラインです。

THE HONEST HEADLINE SHOULD HAVE READ ADULTS REALLY INTO DISNEY

正直なヘッドラインは、大人が本当にDISNEYに夢中になっていることを読むべきでした。

STILL WATCHING ALONE.

まだ一人で見てる

DO YOU FIND THAT WEIRD?

変だと思う？

DON'T YOU.

やめてくれ

>> THAT IS WEIRD.

>> それはおかしいです。

>> JUST ADULTS IN GENERAL.

>> 一般的にはただの大人です。

>> JUST ADULTS, WHEN YOU GO TO THE PARK, AND YOU SEE LIKE A

>> ただの大人が公園に行くと、まるで子供のように見える

COUPLE IN THEIR 30S.

30代のカップル

WITH LIKE ALL THE GEAR ON.

WITH LIKE ALL THE GEAR ON.

>> YOU KNOW THEY ARE GOING HOME AND HAVING SEX ON MICKEY MOUSE

>> YOU KNOW THEY ARE GOING HOME AND HAVING SEX ON MICKEY MOUSE

SHEETS.

シーツです。

>> James: YEAH, I DON'T GET IT AND THEY LIKE YEAH, I SEE THEM

>> ジェームスええ、私はそれを理解していないし、彼らは好きで、私は彼らを見ています。

COMING I'M LIKE IN HERE GUYS.

私はここにいるのが好きなの

I WALK IN LIKE A GIANT SLURPEE AND GOOFY OUTFIT OR SEE THEM

I WALK IN A GIANT SLURPEE AND GOOFY OUTFIT OR SEE THEM.

GETTING PHOTOS.

写真を撮る。

WITH LIKE YOU KNOW, BUZZ LIGHT-YEAR.

WITH LIKE YOU KNOW, BUZZ LIGHT-YEAR.

LIKE A GUY TAKING A PHOTO OF HIS WIFE WITH LIKE MEHTA FROM CARS

車からのような明太を持って妻の写真を撮る男のように

2.

2.

YOU KNOW ALL THE TIME HE'S LIKE WHAT DO YOU DO.

YOU KNOW ALL THE TIME HE'S LIKE WHAT DO YOU DO.

>> HERE'S ONE, HERE IS THE HEADLINE FROM FOX NEWS, AND IT

>> これはFOXニュースのヘッドラインです。

READS MIKE TYSON SAYS HIS 2020 VOTE WAS THE FIRST OF HIS LIFE.

READS MIKE TYSON SAYS HIS 2020 VOTE WAS THE FIRST OF HIS LIFE.

THE HONEST HEADLINE SHOULD HAVE RED TIESON PUNCHED BALLOT,

THE HONEST HEADLINE SHOULD HAVE RED TIESON PUNCHED BALLOT,

BECAUSE HE'S A BOXER.

彼がボクサーだからだ

>> ONE OF THE MOST FAMOUS PUDGE ILIST.

>> 最も有名なパッジリストの一つ。

>> James: HE IS KNOWN FOR PREDOMINANTLY BOXING AND A IMHON

>> ジェームス彼はボクシングとアイホンで知られています。

THING PEOPLE SAY HE PUNCHED A BALLOT BUT IT WORKS IF BOTH WAYS

人々は投票用紙を押したと言っているが、それは両方の方法で動作します。

BECAUSE YOU PUNCH A BALLOT BUT ALSO SUCK HIM INTO A JAW BONE.

君が投票用紙を打つからだが 顎の骨に彼を吸い込んだ

>> WE CAN CHALK THAT RIGHT UP TO WORD PLAY.

>> WE CAN CHALK THAT RIGHT UP TO WORD PLAY.

>> James: WE CAN CHALK THAT ONE UP TO WORD PLAY, THAT IS

>> ジェームス言葉遊びのせいにしてもいいんじゃない？

ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.

ABSOLUTELY RIGHT.

WE CHALKED IT UP, A WORD PLAY CHALK.

WE CHALKED IT UP, A WORD PLAY CHALK.

OKAY.

分かった

HERE'S ONE WERE FROM PEOPLE.

ここにあるのは、人々からの1つのEREです。

AND IT SAYS AMERICAN PERFECT THEIR COFFEE MAKING SKILLS

AND IT SAYS AMERICAN PERFECT THEIR COFFEE MAKING SKILLS

DURING PANDEMIC, THE HONEST HEADLINE SHOULD HAVE READ IT WAS

パンデミックの時には、正直なヘッドラインはそれを読むべきだった。

THE BARISTA TIMES, IT WAS THE WORST OF TIMES.

バリスタ時代は最悪の時代だった

WHERE ARE WE CHALKING THAT ONE.

WHERE ARE WE CHALKING THAT ONE.

>> WE JUST NEEDED SOMETHING TO FILL IN THERE.

>> そこを埋める何かが必要だったんだよ。

>> James: WE DID, WE NEEDED SOME DOWN TIME BEFORE THIS NEXT

>> ジェイムズ: そうだよ、その前にちょっとしたダウンタイムが必要だったんだ。

ABSOLUTE BANGER.

ABSOLUTE BANGER.

>> CLEAR THE RUNWAY.

>> 滑走路を確保してください。

>> HONEST HEADLINE FINAL JOKE, PERMISSION TO LAND.

>> HONEST HEADLINE FINAL JOKE, PERMISSION TO LAND.

WITHIN AND FINALLY HERE'S THE HEADLINE FROM THE HUFFINGTON

WITHIN AND FINALLY HERE'S THE HEADLINE FROM THE HUFFINGTON

POST THAT READS PIZZA SHOP OWNER THAT WARTS RONERY BY TOSSING PIE

POST THAT READS PIZZA SHOP OWNER THAT WARTS RONERY BY TOSSING PIE

AT SUSPECT.

AT SUSPECT.

THAT WAS THE HEADLINE.

それがヘッドラインだった。

THE HONEST HEADLINE, THAT IS A SPICY PIZZA.

正直なヘッドライン、それはスパイシーなピザです。

>> WHEN WE COME BACK WE'RE TALKING TO HENRY WINKLER.

>> 戻ってきたら、ヘンリー・ウィンクラーと話をする。