[ Laughter ]

It can be hard to say goodbye,

but sometimes you have to.

And there are a few things I'd like to

say goodbye to right now.

It's time for "Go On, Git."

♪♪ [ Cheers and applause ]

♪ Go on, git, go on, git ♪

♪ Go on, go on, go on, git ♪

[ Applause ]

[ Laughter ]

-God!

[ Laughing ] What?

-[ Chuckles ] ♪♪

-Okay.

-Go on, git, cargo shorts.

[ Laughter ] You get out of here now.

I loved putting all my stuff in your many wondrous pockets.

And now you're just making me look like an old dad

or a German tourist at the M&M's store in Times Square.

Just go on, git out of here.

And don't you ever come back. Don't look at me like that.

Git, cargo shorts. Git!

[ Laughter ]

[ Applause ]

♪♪

-Is that hay? -Go --

[ Laughter ]

Go on, git, my old DVD collection.

I loved you like a honeydew melon loves

ripening on the vine,

but you're old news now, and as much as it pains me,

I got to let you go.

Fly and be free, "Boondock Saints."

[ Laughter ]

Find a better life without me, "Dude, Where's My Car?"

Git! [ Laughter ]

♪♪

[ Laughter ]

Go on, git.

[ Laughter ]

[ Cheers and applause ]

♪♪

Go on, git,

pizza fresh out of the oven.

Are you delicious? Yes.

Are you going to burn the roof of my mouth? Yes.

For that reason, you got to git out of here

until you spend a few minutes cooling down

on Mama's pie windowsill.

Your joy just brings me too much pain.

Sure, I would eat you with a fork and knife,

but what if someone has a phone?

I'm going to get made fun of on the Internet.

[ Laughter ]

Think I'll be "pizza with a fork" guy?

Nice try, now go on, git.

[ Laughter ]

-Wow.

♪♪

[ Laughter ]

Wow, that was a lonesome --

-Vittles, vittles. -Whoo!

-Vittles ready!

-Go on, git, stools.

You think I want to spend my time

balancing on a seat the shape and size of a button?

[ Laughter ]

Engaging my core atop a wooden board?

I need a back, ya hear?

Sitting should be relaxing, not a sport.

Now go on, git, stool. Come back when you're a chair.

[ Laughter and applause ]

Go on, git, looking at my phone in bed.

All I want to do is fall asleep when it's bedtime,

but then you come around and wake up my brain

with even more of your blue light waves or whatever.

My brain is stupid.

It thinks that your screen is the sun, and that it is morning,

and so I should go wake up and hunt caribou and gather shrubs.

[ Laughter ]

I wish I could keep scrolling down my Insta feed forever,

but I need to sleep, so, go on, git.

[ Laughter ]

♪♪

-Do you need a drink? [ Laughter ]

-Go on, git, gum I've been chewing on

for more than 30 minutes.

You served your purpose, made my breath smell

not like an onion, but now I might as well be

chewing on a rubber band.

Git you gone, gum! Git!

You git now!

♪♪

[ Laughter ]

Go on --

Go on, git, flavored seltzer.

[ Laughter ]

Your bubbly hydration was fun for a while,

and sure, you're better to drink than soda,

but now I'm pounding five or six of you a day

instead of just drinking water from the tap.

The other day I had to take a pill, and instead of just

getting a drink from the faucet,

I opened up a can of LaCroix Pamplemousse.

Saying grapefruit in French simply doesn't need to be

part of me swallowing an Advil.

So, go on!

Git out of here, Pamplemousse,

and take yer no-good key lime sister with ya!

[ Laughter ] Well, it's hard to see them go,

but I'm glad I got them all out of my system.