But one day after being chased by bullies into a subway car, Billy was magic the way to the rock of eternity, where he was granted Bauer's by a mysterious wizard.

Wait, that's it!

No freaky alien genes.

No parents getting gunned down in the valley.

He just hopped on a train and shut up to meet some old dude.

Where's the tragedy?

Where's the drama?

Broomstick?

He's an orphan.

Oh, right.

Suck it up anyway.

The rock of eternity is no ordinary chunk of dirt floating across the cosmos.

It was the home of a wizardly hero who was in need of an air and to claim his powers.

All Billy needed to do was speak aloud a single magic word.

Zam!

What?

Get a magic word is Zam.

Even Aber cadaver would be better than that broomstick.

You have no room to talk.

Your password is password and you don't even spell it, right?

Exactly!

Wiz.

Genius!

I Oh, wait, wait!

How do you know my password?

Let's move on anyway.

Whenever Billy Shelves is magic word with heroic intent.

He summons a bolt of lightning that ages him up to become, as she Azam Billy gains a wide variety of impressive powers, including the wisdom of Solomon, the strength of Hercules, the stamina of Atlas, the lightning of Zeus, the courage of Achilles and the speed of mercury and the body of legal drinking age.

Each of these ancient beings granted their own capabilities to shoes, and the wisdom of Solomon gave him a perfect memory and the ability to magically gain any knowledge he needs to know.

So it's like a smartphone with Internet access.

I sure the strength of Hercules makes him super strong, obviously.

And with the lightning of Zeus, he got awesome electric power's Zeus himself once channel the power to defeat the shattered God being Onley previously slain by the Big Bang.

His lead your mom with the Big Bang.

She is, um, also gained accelerated healing, a shortcut to the rock of eternity and the ability to share his powers with anyone he considers family like his adoptive sister.

I suppose he eventually found himself a home after all.

Huh?

Uh, that's touching.

Put back to cool superpowers with the courage of Achilles.

He became tough enough to survive in space and even take on Superman himself.

And with the speed of Mercury, he can fly as well as move faster than light.

What is everybody?

Get to go freshen the speed of light.

I won't meet some of that.

I mean, I offered to do some genetic, you know, tinkering.

No, not after last time was that was a lot of cosmetic surgery.

So many thumbs.

Well, come back next week for the full episode as we find out who wins in the battle between Captain Marvel and she Suzanne, the other captain, Marvel licensing.