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They're the largest snakes on Earth,
roaming the Amazon.
They've eaten goats,
deer,
and even crocodiles.
So what would happen
if an anaconda tried to eat you?
Believe it or not,
in 2014
someone was actually dumb enough to attempt this.
He was wearing a large,
bulky suit covered in pig's blood.
The anaconda worked for an hour,
wrapping it's mouth around the head of the suit,
but it was ultimately unsucessful
in swallowing the human whole.
If it had been sucessful,
how would an anaconda be able to eat
a full-sized adult?
So you happen to be wandering
in the Amazon rainforest and
stumble upon one of these giant anacondas.
Green anacondas grow up to 9 m in length (30 ft)
and can weigh as much as 225 kg (500 lbs).
You might think you'd be a tasty meal to them,
as a small meal for an anaconda
is about 18 kg (40 lbs).
If they were to gobble you up,
it would keep them satisfied for weeks!
But a meal over 45 kg (100 lbs),
like you
might not be what an anaconda
is most interested in.
Due to how massive you are,
not to mention being taller
and broader than most animals it eats,
you would take too long to consume.
This in turn would leave the anaconda
vulnerable to predators for weeks,
if not months, until it finishes digesting you.
But let's say it did want to eat you.
What would happen then?
Well, before an anaconda swallows you,
it would kill you first.
An anaconda is a constrictor snake,
and it kills by wrapping its body all around its prey
and quickly crushing them to death
with over 9,000 pounds of pressure.
It would be a pretty quick end for you,
but we know that's not how this show works.
So, let's assume you survive this,
and we get to see the entire process.
The anaconda would then widen its jaw
to swallow you whole.
You won't have to worry
about it chewing you up into little bits,
since it only has fangs used for holding its prey.
And luckily,
as opposed to other snakes,
the anaconda isn't venomous,
so its fangs won't poison and paralyze you.
But something you will find in the anaconda's mouth
is lots and lots of saliva.
Yeah, this will be used to moisten you,
You know, so it's easier for the anaconda
to slide you down their gullet.
So now you're moving down the snake's esophagus.
As with many other animals,
the muscles in the esophagus will
push you down the snake's body.
The anaconda also has the ability to move,
and bend its ribs to crush you even further,
and push you down into its stomach.
Okay now, you're in the anaconda's stomach.
Don't worry, we're still keeping you alive.
You know, to make this more fun.
The anaconda's stomach
produces powerful acids
and stomach enzymes
that will dissolve your skin,
and then, eventually, your bones.
How fast do these acids work, exactly?
Well, an anaconda once dissolved an alligator's skin
in just three days.
So your squishy and fleshy skin would
disappear pretty quickly.
Your body would break down even further
as you move through the snake's small intestine.
That's due to the liver and pancreas
secreting even stronger enzymes.
Everything besides your hair and your nails
would be digested at this point.
And even if you were wearing some magical suit
that protected you from the acid
and everything else,
it would still be a couple of weeks
before you were unceremoniously pooped out.
So, its likely you'd starve.
Although something like this is incredibly unlikely,
just leave anacondas alone.
After all,
they aren't interested in eating you in most cases,
as you're just too big.
They're really just trying to defend themselves.
Plus, you'd die pretty much instantly
if you tried to mess with one of these things.
Another thing you probably shouldn't be messing with
are whales.
And you definitely shouldn't be jumping into their stomachs.
But we'll leave that story for another WHAT IF.