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  • in this video, we're going to write a response to a question with the action words do.

  • The advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages.

  • And this is a question type that has been reported to me twice so far in 2017 and it's still quite early in the year, so it's possible that you could get a question like this on your exam.

  • Please leave the light on this video.

  • That really does help my YouTube channel a lot.

  • And please subscribe if if you feel inclined to do so.

  • Okay, let's look at the question.

  • So the question reads, More and more students are going to another country for higher education.

  • Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

  • Okay, so in this question, you're going to want to structure the response in a way that allows you to discuss the advantages and the disadvantages.

  • It is possible for you to declare a position in the introduction paragraph, but these types of questions where you're asked for, like the pros and the cons of the advantages of the disadvantages they work best when you do kind of go through some sort of discursive process to come to a a reasoned conclusion.

  • So that's what I'm going to do in this sample essay.

  • Now, before you commit your pen to paper, of course, you want to have a bit of a brainstorm obsessions that you have, you know, ideas in mind Before you start the writing process, this will help you to write more fluently and to have your your entire essay work much better.

  • Um, you know, as a cohesive whole.

  • So before sort of video, I came up with these ideas.

  • So on the advantages side, I thought, first and foremost, you know, having international students at the university exchanges, it allows people to exchange understanding, and and, uh, this enriches the the academic experience as a whole.

  • So if you have people coming from another corner of the planet, maybe their approach to engineering is different.

  • It has creative ideas.

  • And, you know, they come to you, your university in your country, which has an academic backlog of information that they would find helpful.

  • So just be exchanging of understanding, I think, is one of the top advantages that come to mind.

  • Secondly, of course, the exchanging of cultures which encourages international collaboration and friendship.

  • Now the disadvantages.

  • I had some trouble coming up with them.

  • To be honest, because you know disadvantages to having international students or two to the growing numbers of international students, it's sort of hard to think of what the disadvantage would be.

  • But I thought that something that's kind of been in the news lately, you know, with the apprehension about migration around the world right now, perhaps local students feel they need to compete with foreign students, and this could lead to employment issues in a country.

  • You're these sorts of things.

  • But I mean, you can probably tell by the tone of my voice that I I'm not completely convinced by these.

  • And in this essay I'm going to declare that this disadvantage is an opinion that people have just not my opinion, really, but and that I'm going to kind of disprove this or show that this is thespians.

  • Ishan is something that is not easy to support, but there's not a lot of evidence for okay, So even before I started this essay, I know that I am going to conclude by saying that the advantages do indeed outweigh the disadvantages.

  • All right, so if you were able to kind of have this this sort of mental clarity.

  • Before you start your essay, you're obviously going to write and much more cohesive in a much more coherent piece because you know where you want to go with the S E eventually, Okay, that I hope to keep all of your language in line.

  • So we're having a bit of a mental planet is, of course, important.

  • So let's start the essay now.

  • I want to, of course, start with the background sentence kind of declaring the subject of the essay.

  • So it is very common today, um, four students to go abroad to complete their college or university, uh, education.

  • Okay.

  • And then in the second sentence, we want to narrow this to the more specific topic or the specific theme that we're looking at.

  • And that is the advantages and the disadvantages.

  • And a good way to do that is with however.

  • So after you've declared whatever the topic is, you can see However, this trend ah, maybe just presents you more are both.

  • I guess its advantages and disadvantages on dhe then way might even narrow it further to the students and the institutions.

  • involved.

  • Okay, so the reader knows that that this is gonna be something very central in this piece.

  • Now, the last sentence that we're going to have in this introduction is a declaration of structure for the essay and is a very key sentence because it allows the in this case, the Examiner to know exactly what sort of structure they can look for in the rest of the essay.

  • So these items will be analyzed, Um, in this essay on dhe, Then I will also tell the Examiner that I'm going to state my position at the end.

  • So before a position is declared so you could have written this passive impassive English.

  • But you could say before I declare ah, position, which would be fine as well.

  • But I was gonna leave like this, so these items will be analyzed.

  • This that's a proposition is declared.

  • So now, as we go through this s e, I want to point out a few of the different linking items that I'm using and encourage you to try using these in your own essays.

  • So I started.

  • I start this paragraph with is very common.

  • Oh, what am I doing here?

  • today.

  • It is very common today for students to go.

  • Okay, so So a very nice opener t get into wherever your background senses your backward information is.

  • And of course, if you're going to say it is very common today, be sure whatever the topic is is indeed common on.

  • Like I was saying to switch over, um, you could actually you could adapt this entire part of the sentence to your own writing.

  • So however, this trend presents, but with advantages and disadvantages.

  • Okay.

  • And then two, and then whatever the topic is, and this'll entire sentence could be something that you taken adapt to your own reading.

  • These items will be analyzed in this SC before a position is declared.

  • So of course I'm not saying to take these items and reproduce them on your next Eilts exam.

  • You don't do that, but, you know, take these little bits of language and practice, using them in your own writing and adapting to your own writing style.

  • Okay, so our first supporting paragraph is going to, of course, look at the advantages.

  • So we want to say that there are indeed advantages.

  • So let's say something like the advantages.

  • Um uh, rising of rising foreign student numbers are not plentiful.

  • Make numerous.

  • The adventures of rising foreign student numbers are numerous.

  • Um, so our point, the point that assured in my brain storm was that, um so, you know, having increasing numbers of foreign students or having foreign students at all encourages wth e exchange of understanding of international perspective.

  • And this is good for a university, you know, department or faculty, because it helps to bring, you know, greater understanding, greater depth to the programs that are on offer.

  • So let's say for one.

  • Ah, see this friends encourages, um, human collaboration.

  • Um, and progress could we see or maybe just human collaboration and in exchange of ideas, an excuse.

  • And it's just it's right.

  • We're working the words at my head here and the exchanging of ideas that exchanging.

  • Okay, Now we want to be a bit more narrow with the example.

  • So I'm going to, um, just sort of, you know, make something up here.

  • So if I were to say, a Canadian Oh, I started, for example, uh, comedian engineering students in Japan would, um, so would bring ideas and perspectives.

  • Um, difference That classmates.

  • Um, and then, let's say a phenomenon that, uh, riches the universities, um, program as a fool.

  • Uh, so, for example, a Canadian jeering student in, uh, attending, uh, Japanese university wouldn't bring ideas and perspectives different to that of their classmates.

  • A phenomenon that enriches the university program as a whole.

  • Now, of course, if you did have personal experience as an international students, um, I don't, for example, I mean, I've gone to school in Canada and the U.

  • S.

  • And it was very cold.

  • Very similar, I guess.

  • But, um, you would want to share something you know as concrete as possible.

  • Or if you had something that you could you could say as a personal experience that would obviously, you know, bring the example toe life and be a much greater greater support for your argument.

  • But anyways, this works in this case.

  • So, for example, a Canadian engineering student attending a Japanese university would bring ideas and perspectives different to that of the classmates, a phenomenon that enriches the university's program.

  • And that's to see on level of discussion as a bull.

  • Okay.

  • All right.

  • Now, in addition to this, we were going to say that, um, that, you know, foreign students at universities outside their home country.

  • This is a phenomenon that helps to encourage cultural understanding.

  • So let's sing.

  • In addition, do this, um, having studied outside there, home, country, uh, student woods take valuable international.

  • Uh, now, I've used the word perspective.

  • I've used the word understanding.

  • Standing?

  • Uh, no, I haven't used.

  • Understand.

  • Okay.

  • Still wanna double up in the book?

  • Had too much.

  • In addition, this having studied outside their home country, this student would take valuable international understanding, um, understanding with, um with them, and then we start point of this is an important second benefit promotes, um um promotes international, um, friendship.

  • Um, okay.

  • Interview piece for international friendship.

  • Okay.

  • Okay.

  • So now we've shared a few very concrete examples, Um, or basically are making to conclusions based on one concrete examples of this Canadian engineering students.

  • So two good things come from that when they attend university in Japan.

  • So now what we want to do is we want to bring this paragraph to close.

  • So let's say, as these examples show, um, as these examples show students and the world at large, um, when fire studies are engaged outside the home country.

  • Okay.

  • All right.

  • So now let's read through that paragraph again.

  • I want to point out that the small, sort of linking phrases of the phrases that help the whole thing work is a cohesive whole.

  • The advantages of rising foreign student numbers are numerous.

  • For one, this trend encourages human collaboration and the exchanging of ideas.

  • So, um so that's maybe some language that you could take with you.

  • So, you know, moving to the first point in the paragraph that you're going to use to defend or to illustrate the topic sentence, for example.

  • Of course.

  • So, for example, of Canadian engineering students attending a Japanese university would bring ideas and perspectives different to that of the classmates.

  • A phenomenon that enriches the university's program and level of discussion as a whole.

  • Um, okay, in addition to this, having studied outside their home country, this student would take valuable international understanding with them, an important second benefit that promotes peace and international friendship.

  • So, uh, linking freeze here.

  • So, in addition to this, okay, and finally ask these examples show.

  • I guess it's just the one example, isn't it?

  • As this example, shows students in the world at large benefit when higher studies are engaged outside the home country.

  • Okay, so that's the linker.

  • That kind of brings us down into the into the conclusion for the paragraph.

  • Now we're going to turn it around and look at the disadvantages of this.

  • So let's shift using, however, and okay, let's say so.

  • However, now, our disadvantage point was that local students may be threatened by foreign talent.

  • This could lead to the loss of jobs.

  • Um, so we said the globalizing of higher education, it does have a certain disadvantages.

  • And you know what I like?

  • I was saying, I mean, I want to sort of give the reader that, you know, the feeling that I'm I'm much more in support of the advantages, but I don't want to do that without fully declaring what the disadvantages could be.

  • So I guess what I'm saying is, I just want to distance myself a little bit.

  • So I'm gonna stick in here.

  • Many would argue.

  • Okay, so it's sort of like this isn't really my opinion.

  • These are disadvantages that somebody might argue, but But that person isn't necessarily meet.

  • So, however, many would argue that globalizing of higher education doesn't certain disadvantages.

  • Um, so we might talk about the the perspective or the opinion that foreign student numbers are threatened some some way.

  • So we might say so for many young adults, uh, for important students, may represents a threat.

  • Two professional opportunities.

  • Doctor school.

  • Um, okay, we might even make the idea bit bigger.

  • And so after school and the workforce of there country at large, I could use that large before, Let's say, the overall workforce, um uh, course of their country over the overall workforce, the country.

  • So for many young adults, foreign students may represent a threat to professional opportunities after school and the overall workforce of their country.

  • Um, okay, two.

  • I'm gonna stick in here both.

  • So represent a threat to both professional opportunities after school and the overall workforce of their country.

  • Okay, so now as an example, I'm going to share that in Canada.

  • Um, sometimes large companies will scout for talent on university campuses.

  • So I guess particularly in the sciences.

  • If if, if students at the university or doing something really interesting that looks like it could lead to to some breakthrough of some kind so that this could lead to serious opportunity, opportunities and employment.

  • And I guess the point here is that, um you know, these scouts, they're they're basing their opinions completely on talent.

  • It's not necessarily where the student is from.

  • So I guess I just you know, um, a drawback of having a large foreign population at a university is that it might cut away the job opportunities that would otherwise be offered to to local university students.

  • Okay, so let's say, in Canada, for example, um Cos.

  • Scoped Collins on numbers and split times, this means choosing.

  • Are you going execute over a little You can't.

  • For example, companies kept telling university campuses, and it's like times.

  • This means choosing a foreign student, um, over a local students, she just offering foreign students instead a local student.

  • So now this is the point where I want to start to turn around the progression of the discussion here because, you know, we're talking about this as if it were a disadvantage.

  • But this next sentence I want to point out that that this in a very small context, might seem like a disadvantage.

  • But the you know what this could lead to for a country as a whole is actually an advantage.

  • So I would use something like although this scenario does occur, its impact on E um hole workforce Uh, um, local graduates and their employment opportunities.

  • I think what I'll say is that you know, it is a problem, but it's it's something that has been kind of sensationalized by the media and that, you know, with glowing globalization, thes local graduates have opportunities across the world.

  • Really?

  • So you know, if I guess I mean, in select cases, they, for instance, might be chosen over them.

  • But, you know, in the grand scheme of things, there's lots of opportunities for their employment.

  • So let's say its impact on local graduates and their employment opportunities is sensationalized, sensationalized?

  • Um uh, been sensationalized by media, but the, uh, and actually getting in sticking here in and president.

  • Okay, you know what?

  • I'm gonna make an executive decision here and just change the example to the U.

  • S.

  • Okay, so, in the US, for example, cos scope, talent, university campuses, and at select times, this means offering employment to a foreign student instead of a local student.

  • Although this scenario does occur, its impact on local graduates and their employment opportunities has been sensationalized by the media.

  • And, let's say large personalities like President Trump.

  • Um, so now I want to kind of lead us to the bigger idea that having the most talented people in the world, you know, study in your country and then go on to make great discoveries in your country.

  • That's actually that's good for your country.

  • So that's where I'm going carrying the same.

  • Moreover, um, it should be remembered that attracting worlds most talented um, students means, uh, more rich inner that attracted the world's most talent students means increases opportunities for important No, no thanks.

  • Nominations.

  • Um, I was like scientific discoveries centuries, and so Okay, ah, scores.

  • Okay.

  • So moreover, it should be remembered that attract the world's most talented students increases opportunities for important phenomenons like scientific discoveries.

  • Okay, so now we just want to close the paragraph by making it clear to the reader that we're not totally convinced that the disadvantages are something that we can support so decently.

  • Thus, the disadvantages of students going abroad for higher education are somewhat difficult, too.

  • Defend or, um, I mean, in this case, it seems I find it difficult to define, and I'm gonna take it somewhere new That's still too informal or difficult to define.

  • Okay, so let's read through that paragraph and we'll look at the different ways of the ideas linked together.

  • So firstly, we showed the reader that we're turning the essay around to look at the disadvantages.

  • So we've used the word, however, and as I was saying, I stuck in here.

  • Many would argue, uh, which is It's helpful in distancing yourself a little bit if if if you want to or need to.

  • For many, excuse me, however, many would argue the globalizing of higher education does have certain disadvantages.

  • For many young adults, foreign students may represent a threat to both professional opportunities after school and the overall workforce of their country.

  • Ah, in the U.

  • S.

  • For example, companies scout talent on university campuses, and at select times this means offering employment to a foreign student instead of a local student.

  • So if you've watched my videos before, you know this structure where you can bring up ah context, I guess so in the U.

  • S.

  • And then comma, for example, comment and carry on with the example.

  • OK, although this scenario does occur, right?

  • So this is a language that you can use your own essay to kind of turn the theme.

  • The direction of the discussion, its impact on local graduates and their employment opportunities has been sensationalized by the media and large personalities like President Trump.

  • Moreover.

  • Okay, and you keep and carry on with this.

  • So moreover, it should be remembered that so this is, you know, where you're kind of leaning into your own perspective or additional evidence that that supports what you're saying.

  • So this, moreover, is very much connected to the change in tone of the essay.

  • Okay, because I'm changing it to thio.

  • Going gains the disadvantages.

  • Now I'm carrying on with more points here.

  • So moreover, it should be remembered that attracting the world's most talented students increases opportunities for important phenomenons like scientific discoveries.

  • Thus, the disadvantages of students going abroad for higher education are difficult to define.

  • Okay, Um, okay, so now the whole point of the video is we're looking at a question that asks about whether advantages outweigh disadvantages.

  • So that's what you know our response to that specific set of action words happens right here in the in the conclusion paragraph in this case, and the conclusion is very easy to write because it's it's sort of just a restatement of what you've already talked about, and then a declaration of your position.

  • So, um, as the above discussion reveals the advantages manages of, um, localized higher education, uh, much way the disadvantages, um, and I'm just gonna stick a personal hope here.

  • So and I strongly hope countries continue to encourage, um to encourage, um, thank you.

  • Are you encouraged, bro?

  • They're foreign student bodies.

  • As the above discussion reveals theat vantage is of globalized.

  • Higher education much outweigh the disadvantages.

  • And I strongly hope countries continue to encourage the growth of their foreign student bodies.

  • Okay, so, uh, see, you could take this entire phrase here as the above discussion reveals the advantages of rate and adapt that to your own writing, much outweigh the disadvantages.

  • Okay, on then, to share your your hope for the future, which is kind of a nice way to finish an essay or recommendation or yeah, the hope for a recommendation.

  • I strongly hope and then whatever you want.

  • Thio State.

  • Okay, so let's go back up to the beginning of the essay.

  • Now, as we read through it traded.

  • See how the different senses sort of work together.

  • The entire essay works on the same theme.

  • You know, we're very careful when we when we switch perspectives and, uh, and declare, you know, that the different points that we wanted to clear.

  • So I'm just gonna read to the question first, more and more students are going to another country for higher education, to the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages.

  • And I should've pointed out before, but the question doesn't really define, you know, advantages for for whom are we talking about?

  • For students, for countries, you know, what is the context?

  • So we're safe to kind of put our own context, our own spin on this as long as we stay within the topic.

  • And that's what we've done here.

  • We've looked at how this can improve students lives, improves universities, and it improves countries of the whole.

  • It is very common today for students to go abroad to complete their college or university education.

  • However, this trend presents both advantages and disadvantages to the students and the institutions and bolt.

  • These items will be analyzed in this essay before a position is declared the advantages of rising foreign student numbers of numerous.

  • For one, this trend encourages human collaboration and the exchanging of ideas.

  • For example, a Canadian engineering student attending a Japanese university would bring ideas and perspectives different to that of their classmates.

  • Let me just change it to those of their classmates of phenomenon that enriches the university's program and level of discussion as a whole.

  • In addition of this, having studied outside their home country, this student would take valuable international understanding with them, Um, an important second benefit that promotes peace and international friendship, as this example shows students and the world at large benefit when higher studies are engaged outside the home country.

  • However, many would argue the globalizing of higher education does have certain disadvantages for you.

  • For many young adults, foreign students may represent a threat to both professional opportunities after school and the overall workforce of their country in the US, for example, cos scout talent on university campuses and at select times, this means offering employment to a foreign student instead of a local student.

  • Although this scenario does occur, its impact on local graduates and their employment opportunities has been sensationalized by the media and large personalities like President Trump.

  • Moreover, it should be remembered that attracting the world's most talented students increases opportunities for important phenomenons like scientific discoveries.

  • Thus event the advantages of students going abroad for higher education or difficult to to define delectably companies.

  • Breath and put it into support is gonna change us the last minute.

  • But that's what you That's very proof read right.

  • As the above discussion reveals, the advantage is a globalized, higher education much outweigh the disadvantages.

  • And I strongly hope countries continue to encourage the growth of their foreign student bodies.

  • Okay, so I hope that was helpful in addressing these sorts of questions that I ask you to define or to declare whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

  • Please leave it like in the video.

in this video, we're going to write a response to a question with the action words do.

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このIELTSエッセイでは、長所は短所を切り捨てるのか? (Do the advantages trump the disadvantages in this IELTS essay?)

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    林宜悉 に公開 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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