You're just in time for coffee time with their host, the ex Google ex Facebook tack lied and introvert because today I wanted to tell you the truth about introverts.

And as an ex Google ex Facebook multi milliner, I've just been caught an introvert my entire life as if it's something to feel ashamed about.

Maybe because we haven't seen too many Romanos who are introverts.

You know, it's funny that ever since my ex wife left me a few months ago, I've just been really enjoying my time alone.

I've been traveling alone, hiking alone, going out to restaurants alone, hanging out with my dog alone.

And I've just been getting so much work down.

Ted, jump with all of the loose ends of my life that I fear.

I'm starting to enjoy my free time a little bit too much, and it's not like I'm going out partying and clubbing in the evenings.

I just stay here.

Actually, all day, 24 7 pretty much I don't really go out because if I do, people are going to recognize me.

It's a lot like living in an embassy voluntarily.

Quick pops, thanks to our sponsor blinkers and that that condenses nonfiction books into just 15 minutes that you can read or listen on the go.

This is amazing.

It helps you absorb many more books quickly.

The 1st 100 people to go to blink is dot com slash tech lead.

We get a free one week trial membership plus 25% off premium, so check it out.

My teachers would assume that I'm shy, timid, Asian.

But imagine the look on their faces now when they see one arrogant prick I've become.

The fact is, part of me believes that introverts don't even exist likely in about 100 years, new research will confirm that there is no such thing as extra verse.

Er introvert.

Rather, we just have a culture of obnoxious, loud people who refuse to acknowledge their own character flaws.

And then the so called introverts like myself, simply don't want to waste our breath talking to people who can't seem to think or self reflect deeply enough.

It's really emotionally draining to talk to somebody who makes snap judgments without thoughtful consideration, who uses volume of voice to win discussions and who can't seem to listen in the society that appears to award that type of behavior.

In fact, if you were to compare the people from 100 years ago in the 19 hundreds with people today, you might find that most of us today would be considered introvert.

We spend most of our times in front of our screens studying things.

There's just so much more we need to learn these days.

Compared to people in the past who are just farmers or bricklayers and manufacturers, it may just be that introverts are slightly ahead of their times or just busier, more productive people.

If you've ever traveled at all internationally, you'll know this.

The stark differences between cultures in America.

We don't seem to reward the active listening.

We never say, Hey, it's a great job that this President Sable Listen, we say it's a great job.

This person is able to speak out in class the act of mutual respect, taking turns talking.

We just don't appreciate that.

And then we just label that as introversion.

Masking any further discussion on this calling someone introverted is a lot like labeling someone you disagree with as crazy and not taking any further than that In reality, I don't think that we're so different.

After all.

It's said that introverts get energized when they interact with people.

But let's face it, if you were to take an introvert and surround them with the top three people that they would like to meet in the world, myself included, then they would probably be extremely excited and energized about this meeting in which may be they can have a private dinner conversation with these people that they really look up to or would like to meet.

Having grown up myself with a lot of friends who may have been labeled as in Traverse, I think they're just normal people who appreciate human company.

It's just that they may prefer handing out with people who are board game enthusiasts, happiest programmers or book readers.

They may simply not enjoy your style of communication or the activities that you do.

If you're in extra over and rather than simply labeling these people as something different than yourself, it may actually help to try to understand that.

And why then, your ability to appreciate other, more diverse interests such that you can learn to hang out with these people in the way that they appreciate.

Now.

Of course, there may exist people who are likely truly introverted, like hermits, actually who really don't appreciate human company who are kind of crazy in that sense, myself included.

But in today's society, where we're labeling 25 to 40% of our population as introverted, I just don't think that's the case.

I think that most people labeled us and reverse.

It may just be people raising the different type of culture or society that respects listening, not interrupting other people and not wasting precious time on gossip or fluff.

Talk personally for me, a better worker characterize myself is a busy person.

I've just always had a lot of side projects and other activities and interest I'd be consumed with, and I remember even when I was dating my ex wife, we would meet up on the weekends, and then I would have Monday to Friday, all to myself and to me that was the perfect balance.

But after a while there was a time where we both quit.

Our jobs moved in together, and so we were in the same room 24 hours a day, seven days a week, and I remember thinking that was just way too much time to be with another person, even if I liked the other person and I would tell her I needed some time alone.

I just I can't get some of my other work done research things on the Internet that my thoughts organized, sort of decompress and chew on ideas I have been considering.

And so I would organize times where we would just go to a cafe and not really talk too much and just sit there with our laptops and just think about things and organize ourselves.

She never seemed to quite get that lifestyle, but I need the time to think self, reflect, self correct and really feel that abundance of preparedness.

It's a lot like before taking a trip.

You just want a bunch of time to yourself, such that you can get everything sorted.

You have your plan in your mind about exactly what that trip is going to look like.

What you're gonna do.

Any loose ends have been taking care of.

That type of feeling is how I like to begin my days, and this may happen to other people as well.

For example, if you're raising the family that Valdez books, you start talking with other people.

You find nobody really enjoys reading books, and they just want to talk about reality TV shows, Netflix and sports.

Also, our society tends to reward people who can just talk on and on and on, kind of like myself.

But I remember once I was over at the Google leadership event and it was supposed to be a team event with 30 people, and we were giving feedback about the activities.

And there's always this one guy who was just dumb in the every conversation.

He would just talk for like, 10 minutes and use up all the time and keep going on and on, and none of his ideas were, well fleshed out.

And I was just surprised that nobody stepped in to stop this guy.

And there may also just simply be people who have a stronger work ethic who don't have so much time to waste talking to each other handy now over a coffee or beer and just burning hours every evening on chit chat.

Sure, it's good to talk to people, and that's a very productive use of time.

But after a while is just self congratulatory or commiserating with each other, and then you just need to start taking action at some point.

And I have this theory that even though introverts are considered timid or shy, perhaps they're actually the ones who are quite secure and comfortable with themselves and then maybe the extroverts who are afraid to be left alone in their own emptiness.

I remember back in school I didn't talk much, partly because I thought the teacher was an idea or dictator tyrannical in their ways, and that just became disinterested and didn't feel like participating anymore.

I wasn't motivated.

There was no incentive to do that.

It's not like I could monetize my sharing of opinions or get sponsorships like I tend now and plenty of classroom discussions.

I'm sure that students have already solved the problem of world peace, and yet that discussion never goes anywhere.

At the end of the day, it's a simple classroom exercise, and for me it's hard to get motivated about that.

A few times I remember I would explode that my teacher and tell them how idiotic they were or how stupid their ways of teaching where and then they would have a little chat with me afterwards.

I don't think these are things that timid or shy person would do.

Rather, they're things that I maybe feel like I couldn't talk about that was unacceptable and that I just didn't want to cause any more trouble.

I had nothing positive to add to that discussion as a self proclaimed introvert.

Sometimes I would engage in discussions with other people.

And, you know, sometimes I wonder what if we were to play a game where for every word you say, I get to say a word as well such that we're not talking over each other?

We're not dominating one another, but you'll find I think, that many discussions.

There may just be one person who's talking 90% the time, and they failed to realize how much disrespect they're causing.

The other person.

It may take the other person sometime, even a minute or two, to really formulate their thoughts and really come up with the opinions that they want to share.

But that doesn't mean that you can just interrupt them or speak over them or take their time that was supposed to be allocated to them.

I would encourage you once you've said you're a bit too.

Just wait and pause and see what the other person has to say and not to just assume that they have nothing more to share.

Do you think that these people don't have opinions, that they're neutral, that they don't care?

Most people, quiet or loud, do have opinions.

I've lived much of my life alone, and I remember there's a time I'd be in New York City by myself, and I would take these long walks from uptown Central Park all the way down to Wall Street in downtown.

And it was just the most calming walk because it would give me time to sort.

My thoughts, organized my ideas, and I will bring a pen and a pad, and by the end of my walk, I would always have, ah, huge list of things.

I either wanted to look up more Explorer or just take action on.

Imagine if I never took those walks.

All of those thoughts would just be left jumbled in my head, and we'll just be going around in my life, not really understanding or comprehending what I'm doing for May I just feel like I'm a normal person, mostly surrounded by loud, annoying people who can't seem to acknowledge that fact and then need to go label everybody else.

If we can learn to really value each other, have that mutual respect and to listen, then we can truly bring out the best in each other.

Not before I wrap up.

I just want the address people who are going to say that I'm not a psychologist, that I'm wrong about these things, that their studies that prove this or that, and I just have one thing to say to you.

In today's age, it can be hard to find the time to sit down and learn more.

With social media being so addictive and time consuming, you may think you don't have time to read a book or develop yourself.

There's a nap I highly recommend called Blink ist Blinking is the only app that takes the best insights the need to know information from thousands of non fiction books and condenses them into just 15 minutes that you can read or listen to so you don't have to read an entire book, but you can still get the best learnings from it.

Eight million people are already using.

Blink is right now, and it has a massive library from self help business.

Health to history books.

I like Blink is just for catching up on popular books quickly and 15 minutes while driving in my car or before I go to bed, I've listened to Quite Power.

A book about introversion by Susan Cain.

I would highly recommend the 1st 100 people to go to Blink is dot com slash tech.

Leader will get free one week trial membership plus 25% off membership.

So check him out.

Link in the description below.

You can either go believe these research studies, or you can choose to believe me, right, The tack leap.

It's your choice.

Me or then who are you going to believe?

And you know you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make a drink so that go for me.

Let me know your experiences with extroverts.

I introverts would love to hear if you like the video, give the like and subscribe, and I'll see you next time.