My favorite war is

Oh, they're so many

They're good for different reasons

Falklands! That's...

Probably the Falklands, cos we won that one

and it was great, it was against Argentina. Yeah, weird.

We're going to war with Argentina. Alright, OK, fair enough, yeah.

But...

the reason it's my favorite war is that it was a range war and what that means is that

the Argentine guns

could fire 9 kilometers

the British guns

could fire 17 kilometers

so we just parked our ships

10 kilometers away

and theirs were falling into the sea

and we were shelling the shit out of them.

It's the war equivalent of holding a midget at arm's length

and he's flailing and you're just kicking him in the bollocks like that.

Vietnam - best soundtrack.

Second World War

best ending.

That had to be the end, that was a great finale, you couldn't follow that, could you?

People are worried about atomic energy

ooh, it's bad

the effects are still being

felt today

but it ended a war

and that's good

and it was discovered by Einstein

and he's a genius

in his 1903 paper he said that light can be described as discrete bundles

of energies

the when irradiate on an unstable me..

What maniac thinks like that? Really.

I'm not a doctor, but I think that's what turns Stephen Hawking mad - too much thinking.

Do you know what I mean?

[robotic voice] The universe is expanding

'Course it is, Stephen, yeah, 'course it is, yeah.

Jeez, take a day off

Go for a walk.

Well, not a walk, but, I mean, just... No...

Open a window

watch a bit of TV, Robot Wars is on, you love that, don't ya?

Greatest mind on the planet.

People say ooh, we shouldn't have a go at Stephen Hawking, ooh, he's a genius.

He is not a genius

he's pretentious.

Born in Oxford and talks with that fake American accent.

He is actually a hero of mine

not my greatest hero, my greatest hero

is Nelson Mandela.

What a man, isn't he? Incredible man.

[Applause]

Incarcerated for twenty five years

he was released in 1990, he's been out for about eighteen years now.

And he hasn't reoffended.

I think he's going straight

which shows you prison does work.

I learnt a lot last year about one of your great American heroes Rosa Parks. It was the

200 years celebration

of the abolition of slavery in Britain last year.

We were a bit ahead of you on that, but well done, well done.

But the abolition of slavery wasn't the end of racism, racism was still inherent in society

as late as the 50's and 60's in England and America.

And it was this one incident that sparked off the civil rights movement

A young black woman called Rosa Parks refused to give up her seat to a white person on the

bus, it was the law

but she'd had enough.

And she was arrested for that

but then that law was changed.

But she didn't stop there

she started sitting in those seats meant for disabled people.

She talked to the driver when the bus was in motion.

Did she have the correct change ready? Did she, bollocks.

Oh, some people.

Cheers!