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  • On December 31, Donald Trump said his dream was for peace,

  • specifically in the Middle East.

  • And then on January 2, he did this.

  • ANNOUNCER: This is CNN Breaking News.

  • Our breaking news tonight is huge.

  • A rocket attack on the Baghdad airport

  • kills Iran's most revered military leader

  • and a senior official in Iraq's paramilitary forces.

  • Now, the Pentagon announced tonight

  • that the attack was a U.S. air strike.

  • Sweet Jesus.

  • Donald Trump ordered the killing of Iran's top general.

  • What happened to peace? Huh?

  • When most people break their resolutions,

  • they eat ice cream instead of working out.

  • This guy rained down fire on these mother(bleep).

  • He ate ice cream while doing it.

  • Now, despite... despite-- that's a real thing.

  • He ate ice cream while it was happening.

  • He's like, "Mmm."

  • Now, despite all the instant experts on social media

  • suddenly tweeting about Soleimani,

  • the truth is, for most Americans,

  • Iran's top general was far from a household name, right?

  • The only Iranian leaders most people know

  • are the Ayatollah and The Iron Sheik.

  • It's a very broad range.

  • But don't get it twisted. Don't get it twisted.

  • For Iranians, General Soleimani was as big as it gets.

  • NEWSMAN: Qasem Soleimani was no ordinary general.

  • The U.S. officially classified him as a terrorist,

  • but in Iran, he was a national hero.

  • NEWSWOMAN: This morning the entire region on edge.

  • Iran vowing retaliation amid fears that two nations

  • are on the brink of an all-out war.

  • NEWSMAN: Funeral processions unlike anything seen in decades

  • are continuing this morning.

  • President Trump and Iran are also dangerously trading

  • very serious threats of war.

  • A commander of Iran's Revolutionary Guard

  • said his country had 35 U.S. targets in its crosshairs,

  • ready to pull the trigger.

  • President Trump tweeted over the weekend

  • the U.S. has 52 targets identified,

  • including cultural sites in Iran.

  • Okay, you have to admit this is wild.

  • Trump kills Iran's top general,

  • and then when Iran threatens to retaliate,

  • Trump says, "You better not, or I'll destroy your culture."

  • Yeah. What's next, he's just send a text,

  • like, "Oh, you think you crazy?

  • -Well, I'm loco, ese." -(laughter)

  • Now, first of all, destroying cultural sites

  • is probably a war crime.

  • You can't do that, all right?

  • Because according to the Geneva Convention,

  • in war, the things you destroy

  • are supposed to be for the purpose of the war,

  • not just to be dicks.

  • But secondly, there is no way Trump knows anything

  • about Iranian cultural sites, okay?

  • In fact, if the Iranians are smart,

  • they'll use this to their advantage

  • just to get Trump to get rid of stuff that they don't want.

  • They'd be like, "Please, Mr. Trump,

  • "don't destroy our most cherished cultural landmark,

  • "that karaoke bar next to my house

  • "that stays open till 3:00 a.m.!

  • -(laughter) -Don't do it, Donald!"

  • So now the United States and Iran are on the brink of war,

  • but the killing of Iran's general has a ripple effect

  • across the entire Middle East.

  • NEWSMAN: The death of Qasem Soleimani in Baghdad

  • ignited a new chapter of regional tensions.

  • American allies in the region

  • are preparing for possible retaliation

  • and are on high alert.

  • So are American forces, with 9,000 in the region

  • and 3,000 extra preparing to deploy.

  • NEWSWOMAN: The State Department issued

  • an urgent warning overnight telling all Americans in Iraq

  • to leave the country immediately.

  • The Pentagon announced that the U.S. has paused its efforts

  • in the fight against ISIS

  • due to a need to protect U.S. troops in the region.

  • NEWSMAN: Iraq's Parliament voted

  • to kick out the 5,000 U.S. troops in the country.

  • President Trump fired back, telling reporters

  • if Iraq does force U.S. troops to leave,

  • he'll make Iraq pay for money the United States spent in Iraq

  • to build an expensive airbase.

  • Okay, guys, I don't know, but I think it's safe to say

  • that this thing's not going according to plan.

  • Because you realize now America is sending more troops

  • to the Middle East-- and also, how is Trump

  • gonna flat-out refuse to leave someone else's country?

  • Right? He would be the worst Airbnb tenant of all time.

  • Yeah. Just writing a review like,

  • (like Trump): I burned myself cooking meth in your kitchen,

  • so I'm not leaving until you give me my money back.

  • (laughter)

  • Now... you might be wondering,

  • how could this well-thought-out plan

  • to assassinate an Iranian general turn out so chaotically?

  • Well, maybe it's because this plan

  • wasn't so well thought out after all.

  • NEWSMAN: After the president saw the protest

  • at the U.S. Embassy in Baghdad and blamed Iran,

  • aides presented the president with a variety of options.

  • NEWSWOMAN: "...top American military officials

  • "put the option of killing him...

  • on the menu they presented to President Trump."

  • Military leaders were stunned when President Trump decided

  • to kill Soleimani,

  • top brass viewing his death as the most extreme option

  • they presented to the president.

  • Okay, now, I know this might not be a popular opinion,

  • but this is where I don't blame Trump.

  • Pentagon officials gave Trump a menu of options,

  • but then they were shocked when he chose the most extreme one?

  • (laughter)

  • Get the (bleep) out of here, man!

  • You were shock... Have you seen Trump's apartment?

  • What part of his life makes you think

  • he's ever gonna pick middle-of-the-road options, huh?

  • If you don't want Trump to pick something,

  • why do you give him the option in the first place?

  • Donald Trump will always pick the most extreme option

  • on a menu, whether it's a military strike or KFC.

  • He's always gonna pick the most extreme thing.

  • He'll be like, "Yes, I'll have the Meat Lovers Explosion

  • with extra bacon served in a kiddie pool of ranch dressing."

  • They'll be like, "Sir, uh, we don't actually have that.

  • That's just, like, a publicity stunt."

  • He's like, "That sounds like a you problem.

  • And no lettuce."

  • (laughter)

  • So, now, because of Trump's extreme decision,

  • the world is in a state of panic.

  • Because, like, the truth is no one really knows

  • what's gonna happen next. Nobody.

  • We could be on the brink of war-- World War III--

  • or the whole thing could just fizzle out,

  • like the beef between Nick Cannon and Eminem.

  • Yeah. Lot of people don't know,

  • but, uh, Jared Kushner actually brokered that peace deal.

  • Yeah. He does stuff.

  • So, we don't know what's gonna happen,

  • but the question on everyone's mind is...

  • why would Donald Trump even bring everybody to this point?

  • Why do something so risky?

  • Why now?

  • Nobody knows.

  • If only there was a wise man,

  • some wise man in 2011

  • who could have predicted

  • why this would be happening today.

  • Our president will start a war with Iran

  • because he has absolutely no ability to negotiate.

  • He's weak, and he's ineffective,

  • so the only way he figures that he's going to get reelected,

  • and as sure as you're sitting there,

  • is to start a war with Iran.

  • I believe that he will attack Iran

  • sometime prior to the election

  • because he thinks that's the only way he can get elected.

  • Isn't it pathetic?

  • -(laughter) -He's right.

  • It definitely is.

On December 31, Donald Trump said his dream was for peace,

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トランプ氏、イランのトップ将軍ソレイマニ氏の暗殺を命令|ザ・デイリーショー (Trump Orders Assassination of Top Iranian General Soleimani | The Daily Show)

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    林宜悉 に公開 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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