字幕表 動画を再生する 英語字幕をプリント -Now, I thought I'd share some of my favorite #MyWeirdTeacher stories from you guys. Here we go. The first one is from @Steve-Shu. He says, "The day after we turned in drafts of our term papers, the professor wore all black to signify his disappointment in our work." [ Laughter and applause ] -He had to tell them, too. Wouldn't figure that one out for yourself. -I'm mourning the loss of your grades, yeah. This one is from @JonBalun. He said, "My teacher moved his left hand in circles as he erased the board with his right hand so he would build the muscles evenly." [ Laughter and applause ] -Wax on, wax off. -Miyagi. Miyagi, yeah. This one is from @tinagibala. She says, "My homeroom teacher kept a list on the chalkboard of people who needed prom dates." -Aw. [ Audience aws ] [ Applause ] Oh. Tina? You and Gary. -Derek's been up here for -- [ Light laughter ] For three weeks now. So anyone wants -- Anyone. You know anyone who wants to go with Derek, or any -- Do you have any pets at home that could maybe go with Derek? Just so he doesn't go alone. This one is from @leighlo-maria. She said, "My biology teacher handed us back our graded homework. Every paper was maroon. She apparently spilled a bottle of red wine." [ Laughter and applause ] -Yoinks! [ Pop ] -This one's from @Corcorcoran2. He says, "If it was your birthday, my teacher would draw a cake on the board and ask you to blow out the candles. You just had to stand there and blow on the chalkboard until he said the candles went out." [ Laughter and applause ] Not yet! -Not yet! -Not yet, keep going. [ Laughs ] -Not yet! -[ Fake crying ] -Okay. Oh, they're trick candles, they're back on again. What's your problem, dude? -I'm in charge! -[ Laughing ] Yeah. I'm the boss, get it? This one's from @HBP-ALWAYS98. She says, "Whenever I ask my teacher what we're doing today, she says, 'working hard and suffering greatly, because life is pain.'" -Oh. [ Applause ] Wow! -[ Laughs ] This one's from @mac-ken-cheese. -Oh, nice. -I get it. Not bad. Mac n' cheese. -Mac n' cheese. -Mac Ken Cheese. -Nice one. -That's a nice one. -Yeah. -mac-ken-cheese. She says, "My chemistry teacher had a taxidermied armadillo in the classroom. For a while, it wore a party hat and it was called The Partydillo." [ Laughter ] -Yeah! -Whoop whoop whoop! -Partydillo! -Byeh, byeh, byeh, byeh! -Raise the roof, Derek! [ Laughter ] -The armadillo said that? -Yeah. [ Laughter ] -This is from @RaskolnikovsAxe. -Ooh, deep. [ Light laughter ] A little crime and punishment. Derek. [ Light laughter ] -He says, "At the end of a test period, our science teacher would respond to our 'one more sec, one more sec!' with 'no more secs!'" [ Laughter ] "No more secs in this classroom!" [ Applause ] I'm talking to you, Derek. -Yeah. This last one's from @TheDonald-Stump. [ Light laughter ] He says, "My teacher would tell us to work hard in math and science classes, otherwise we'd end up as a gym teacher. He was also the gym teacher." -Oh! -There you go. There are your "Tonight Show" hashtags. To check out more of our favorites, go to tonightshow.com/hashtags.