My friends are dictated by similar subscriber counts

My channel takes you through my bedroom routine

It's just between you and me

And 100,000 other tweens

Don't care for money, don't care about the fame

I'm just collabing with my friends

Though I only know their screen names

After five minutes a week you think you know me offline

I exploit fandoms for a bottom line

I...

Conjure fame with challenge vids and

I...

Play drinking games to target kids

And I hope Lucifer will sell me a selfie stick in hell, wheeeee

Welcome, welcome to the YouTube Culture

The YouTube Cult

Hey guys I'm on tour

So tug on mommy's hair

If she pays 200 bucks you can meet and greet a millionaire

Ha, ha, hopping town to town in my first class flight

Which you kinda paid for when you bought my book I didn't write

YouTubers had morals back in 2011

More virgins were at VidCon than in al-Qaeda heaven

Now we're snorting lines of cinnamon

Copycat cashing in

Quality to quantity

It's Kubrick to Kardashian

I...

Idolize your idle eyes and

I...'m

Monetizing kissing guys and

And I won't come out the closet till I've got something to sell about it, whooooo

Welcome, welcome to my YouTube lifestyle

YouTube Lie

Welcome, welcome to the YouTube Culture

The YouTube Cult

There's a mystery to being at the top

People think I'm divine

But the truth is

We're not heroes

We just play some online

I'm like Hercules or Thor with a slightly slimmer bod

Cause yeah I'm just a normal guy but also

I'm a god

So I didn't write my book

Jesus didn't write the Bible

I spread my message through the world with 12 (year old) disciples

I got more slave followers than Moses at the Red Sea

They purchase my biography despite the fact I'm 23

So love me and I'll love you more

Cause I love the way you love me

My church is a merch store

I...'m

Privileged, white, and rich, and male, and

You... are not

So worship at my YouTube sale

I put the "I" in "defy" and suddenly you "deify" me

Welcome, welcome to the YouTube Sensation

The YouTube Sin

Welcome, welcome to my YouTube Lifestyle

YouTube Lie

Welcome, welcome

I said

Welcome to the YouTube Cult

Cheers!

Subscribe!

Hey, I just wanted to say a big thank you

To everybody who came to my ugly room and shot this video

So guys what are your channels?

(incoherent and shameless self-promotion)

So click on their face if you want to see any of that

Bye!