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PETER: Hey, thanks for letting
Hey, you wanna have some locker room talk?
TRUMP: I moved on her, actually.
PETER: Whoa, whoa, whoa.
That's not locker room talk.
I meant like good play, good pass, like that kind of thing.
TRUMP: I moved on air and, I failed.
I'll admit it.
PETER: Well, as long as you didn't try to [bleep] her
and she was single.
TRUMP: I did try and [bleep] her.
She was married.
PETER: Aw, you're awesome!
Hey, you ever thought of being President?
TRUMP: And I moved on her very heavily.
In fact, I took her out furniture shopping.
PETER: Aw, sweet move.
Was it Levitz?
TRUMP: She wanted to get some furniture.
I said, I'll show you where they have some nice furniture.
PETER: [laughs]. Levitz.
TRUMP: But I couldn't get there.
And she was married.
Then all of a sudden I ser her, she's
now got the big phony tits and everything.
She's totally changed her look.
PETER: Well, it is 2005, everything's changing.
Which reminds me, I have an idea for this thing called
Twitter, where crazy people can bash
ladies and minorities at 3 AM.
TRUMP: Sheesh, your girl's hot as shit.
In the purple.
PETER: Oh, also Uber.
I invented it if you're listening
to this in the future.
TRUMP: I better use some Tic Tacs just a case
I start kissing her.
PETER: That's the cheapest breath mint.
I thought you were a billionaire.
TRUMP: You know, I'm automatically
attracted to beautiful-- I just start kissing them.
It's like a magnet.
Just kiss.
I don't even wait.
And when you'e a star, they let you do it.
You can do anything. BUSH: Whatever you want.
PETER: What, like grab them by the hand?
TRUMP: Grab them by the pussy.
PETER: Oh my!
TRUMP: You can do anything.
BUSH: Down below, pull the handle.
PETER: Ah, he can't open it because he has tiny hands.