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  • I've never done coke, or heroine, or crystal meth,

  • because I have a very addictive personality,

  • and I don't wanna become one of those people.

  • Girl in Dress: Hi, can I please have some more drugs?

  • Girl in Hoodie: You got money?

  • Dress: No, but I really loved the drugs.

  • Hoodie: Nah, dawg, no money no drugs. That's simple economics.

  • Dress: [gasps] Oh my God, pleeeeaaaase.

  • Hoodie: No!

  • Dress: Pretty please with a cherry on top.

  • Hoodie: No!

  • Dress: Please, please, please, please, please,

  • Dress: I really liked the drugs so please give me some more drugs.

  • Hoodie: Shut up!

  • Dress: Please. Hoodie: No!

  • Dress:Please Hoodie: No!

  • Dress: [whispering] Please Hoodie: Shut up!

  • Dress: Please! Hoodie: No! Get lost, bitch!

  • Dress: Give me the mother[beep]ing drugs you mother[beep]ing [beep]sucker,

  • before I pop a mother[beep]ing bullet in your mother[beep]ing [beep]!

  • But you know what has always been my drug of choice?

  • Planning.

  • Yeah, that's right, you heard me.

  • Planning.

  • I'm absolutely, completely, 100% addicted to planning.

  • Facebook event? Made. Anime club? Set. Sunday society? Check.

  • And, yes, the trip of witches. [giggles]

  • [softly] Oh no. There's nothing left to plan.

  • Oh nononnonononono, there's gotta be something else that I can plan!

  • Just like a little baby event!

  • I just wanna plan one more thing, just one more thing, just one more thing!

  • I don't know why, it's just that it's always been my jam

  • and like, not only do I get really excited about it, but,

  • it kinda turns me on.

  • You know, when I was like a teenager I would just go into OfficeMax

  • and I would like, nearly cum my pants

  • just looking at all those rows of like, binders and colour coordinated folders and pens,

  • and the whiteboards with the grids on them that break it down by month or week,

  • mmm, yeah, mama likes that.

  • I know this video is like, super weird but for real,

  • I just genuinely have so much excitement about planning.

  • Like, four months ago, I was planning an event

  • that's supposed to happen in April, so like next month,

  • and I made the mistake of planning way too late in the night,

  • because I couldn't sleep. I was literally so fucking excited.

  • Oh my god, what snacks am I gonna bring?

  • Oh and meals for every night! We have to do a taco night, everybody loves tacos.

  • Oh! But I should get everyone's dietary restrictions

  • in case someone is gluten-free or dairy-free or something

  • [gasp] And the carpool thread! Oh, I get to start a carpool thread, that's gonna be so much fun!

  • [gasp] Should I assign rooms based on personality types,

  • or do I send everyone a list and they get to choose for themselves?

  • [gasp] Oh my god, there is so much to plan!

  • [squeals] So much to plan!

  • [gasp] Oh my god, I only have 5 months to make all these decisions.

  • What about you? Is this relatable in any way? Is this just a Type A thing?

  • Like, I feel like I get a sense of immense satisfaction

  • by just having control over all of these chaotic elements, you know?

  • Just bringing them together into a designated location in a point of time and

  • [sigh] I just feel like a God.

  • ♪♪

  • I'm Anna Akana, stay awesome Gotham.

  • ♪♪

I've never done coke, or heroine, or crystal meth,


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B1 中級

気持ち悪いことに目を奪われる (The weirdest thing that turns me on)

  • 83 9
    Ken Song に公開 2021 年 01 月 14 日