How's you doing?

My name is Maria Linda Rosas Rodriguez de Segrita

de Seguan, bam bam la bam, gracias* (thanks) I love much a you* (I love you to much)

Where is Ms. Marie Helen?

Oh sweetie, She is in my school, PS2, 24

a part of the teacher´s exchange program

She is over there right now

Let's pray for her, oh los dios mio! (oh my god) She's gonna get killed

Ok, far away your books

-Far away your books sweeties -Tea..teacher..this is algebra class

Attention mamis (chicks), I'm here for sex educacion* (education)...ok?

Lesson numero uno* (number one)

Don't be a slut, wash your butt!

Listen mamis *(chicks)

Women have a lot more crevices than guys do

a lot of dark and mysterious places for the funk to be hiding

Honey, we'll hide on you

seek it out, deodorize, perfumerize* (perfumerize), sanitize!

Ok, we well

Lesson numero two-no* (number two)

There is no excuse to be loose!

A cup, B cup, C cup, whetever strap them things down, mamis

Wait a minute, wait a minute! Why you not wearing a bra?

-I don´t need to wear a bra -Ooooh!

wait a minute, wait a... listen miss tatas

nobody wants to see you stuff hanging all the time

honey, if you don't be putting a bra

one day they gonna hang down like suspenders, that is just nasty!

Ok, escuchen (listen)

Ok, um... Mrs... whatever

um.. this is all really informative

but how are we going to learn our stuff for algebra test?

Escuchen mamis (listen chiks)

the only test you gonna worry about passing is the pregnancy test

because if you get an F, that stands for "Fertilized"

-y* (and) the stick turns blue mamis (chicks) -(yuck) -Okay, okay

Now, I wanna give you an analogy. Who can explain what an analogy is?

An analogy is a correspondence in some respects between things that are otherwise dissimilar

Muy bueno* (very good) R2-D2, but not

An analogy is that you used to explain when something sounds like another something

-verdad?* (isn´t?) -No

It's simula but it ain't da same

Estúpida!* (Stupid)

lesson numero tres* (number three)

get this down honeys

Kissing leads to humping, just like farting leads to pooping!

I do not think my mother will approve of you, Miss Teacher Farty Poopy

Kind of, kind of a bad teacher

I'm not learning anything

Listen... ok fine... ok fine, I try to teach you something

but if you wanna go and be a hoe, just go

Sit your butt down, mami!

Oooh~ dang! She called you a hoe!

Listen to me, listen! I'm trying to save your lives over here

There are men out there that want your stuff, this is good stuff you gotta protect it!

Listen mamis, they fighting wars for your stuff

you got... is getting worst

They'll be putting testosterone in the water, mamis

Listen, if you gonna be humping, at least put on something!

This is against god!

Listen mami, don't be afraid of this, this is profilactico* (prophylactic)

I know

Don't be listening to all guys talk about on this don't feel natural

You know what? Neither does this, you see this?

In the summertime, you'll be hot, you know what I'm saying?

Oh, I lost... OK, I gotta go outside and smoke a cigarette, you know what I'm saying?

and I come back in and we give to lesson number four

If you didn´t get yours, he didn't do his chores

Are you ready for that? Is so estupidas, is so young.