-Ah, I don't understand.

-What is it?

Can I help you?

-I want to select that file.

-Oh, OK.

I'll show you.

That's basically you just, you know, point your mouse to it,

and then you hit this button to select.

-Ah, duh.

I'm terrible with computers.

Tell me, do I buy a hard disk, a floppy disk, or--

-Oh, brother, do you have a lot to learn.

-Maybe you could show me some stuff.

Say over a drink tonight?

-Oh yeah, if you're serious.

-OK, it's a date.

-Well, when?

Where?

-I'll email you.

-You've got mail.

-Hot damn.

-So I'm going to meet her this afternoon.

-Don't forget to bring your rubbers.

-Ha, ha, we're just having a drink.

-Um-hm.

-I'm hearing wedding bells.

She sounds cute.

-You have never even met her.

-With the name like Molly, she has to be cute.

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

-Hey, this is the headlines.

My name is David Wain, brought to you by Ajax Dishwasher to

do.

-David.

-Oh, hey.

-Hi.

-Hey.

So.

-So.

-So.

I don't want to overwhelm you all at once.

So I thought we'd just start with the basics of OS X before

we get into like web design, and HTML, and programming in

Linux, and kernel panics, and habeas corpus--

-David.

Stop.

I just wanted an excuse to go out with you.

I don't really care about computers.

-What--

Have you seen Leopard?

-I care about getting to know you.

All I know is that you're this sexy guy, who's always in the

coffee shop.

What do you do for a living?

-Well I work in this place, which is apparently some kind

of sweatshop.

How about you?

-I'm a fashion editor for a top magazine.

-Ah.

-Otherwise, I'm just a single gal, who is curious about the

guy behind those sexy lips.

-Hey, Molly.

-Ah, Landon.

Oh, my God.

David, this is my friend Landon.

Landon, this is David.

You don't mind if Landon joins us, do you?

-No.

-No.

Oh-oh, what's the matter?

-I just got dumped.

-Ah.

-I want to kill myself.

-Oh, no, my baby, baby boy.

I just can't wallow in it though , you know?

-No, no.

-Hey, do you want to go dancing?

-Ah, yes.

-OK.

-Come on, David.

[DANCE MUSIC PLAYING]

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

-Oh, shit.

It's my editor.

Ah, I have to go.

I'll call you both tomorrow, OK?

-And then there were two.

-I, I'm probably going to go hit the hay.

-Fuck me.

-What?

I can't wait any longer.

No more games, you have it.

-Molly.

-What?

Oh, I just pulled that whole that's-my-editor routine so

you two could be alone together, so?

Did you guys hook up or what?

-What?

-Wait, you're not trying to tell me you're straight?

-Well, yeah.

-So you weren't saying I'm gay and I want you to set me up

with another gay man to have sex?

-No.

-So I'm crazy?

I just made it up out of thin air?

-Yeah.

Pretty much.

-There you are.

Been looking all over for you.

Let's go into the bathroom, have sex, do a few lines of

co-co-co-co-co.

-Sorry, Landon, I'm not--

-You're not what?

-I'll give you a hint.

Oh, hi.

I want to have sex with other guys.

-Great.

What's the problem?

-No, I'm saying I'm not that.

-You're straight?

Thanks a lot, Molly.

Some friend you turned out to be.

-Aw.

-Next time don't set me up with some four-eyed

boob-loving Jew from Ohio.

-I'm sorry, David.

How can I make it up to you?

-Well, do you want to dance with me?

-Well, my ankle is in excruciating pain, but OK.

[SLOW DANCE MUSIC PLAYING]

Aw.

Aw.

What is your problem?

[MUSIC PLAYING]

What's the matter, mother, don't you love me?

No, I don't.

I regretted having you the moment you slithered

out of my baby hole.