River Ripple, and Wind Runner break into her house.

"Why'd you give Sol plot information?" Shouts Tall Shadow.

"It's all over the internet now!"

"Nothing has happened in four books to move the story along.

We have literally just experienced four disconnected filler stories where nothing whatsoever

has had a lasting effect on the overall plot,"

responds Midnight.

"Sol's the villain now.

I got you a villain."

So the four founder cats poof out of anger, swearing that they'll never

let a villain last more than two books.

Meanwhile in the almost real world,

Hollyleaf is having a nightmare about Sol ruining her birthday party.

She goes on a border patrol and learns that ShadowClan has been collectively influenced to

give up their religion entirely.

Apparently nobody there found it even a

little bit weird to completely abandon their ancestors which they've been

worshipping for generations.

The ShadowClan patrol calls Birchfall a nerd and he just completely loses it.

Hollyleaf is very upset that ShadowClan isn't following the rules.

Although she somehow comes to the conclusion that it's okay

for HER to break them if it's stopping THEM from breaking them.

They sneak into ShadowClan camp and overhear Sol hypnotizing them with the power of public speaking.

Then Jaypaw has a vision of Midnight ruining his birthday party.

Lionblaze asks Ashfur to help him grind.

"You're already, like, level 40 Lionblaze, why the heck do you want to grind?"

asks Ashfur and the reader.

"Because."

"Oh, well, okay then."

But they both get red cards for training without an apprentice which is apparently a rule.

Then Lionblaze has a nightmare about Heatherpaw's corpse ruining his birthday party.

Suddenly, Briarkit and Millie have caught baby disease.

But Jaypaw and Poppyfrost don't find enough catmint.

"Take me instead!"

shouts Millie, who only has a minor cold.

Then Jaypaw goes to the medicine cat book club without Leafpool.

He meets Rock and Midnight instead of real cats and they clearly haven't read the book.

"We're here to tell you that we messed up everything," says Midnight.

"Uh, don't worry, because it will work itself out?"

Immediately afterwards Raggedstar appears and begs Jaypaw to make his clan stop being an atheist.

So Jaypaw gets his siblings together to make a paper mache sign from StarClan.

Hollyleaf tells both of them that she wants to marry the warrior code unprompted

which makes everyone uncomfortable.

Then Thornclaw somehow gets baby disease, too.

Berrynose somehow covers his ears with his tail to ignore his coughing.

His tail.

Berrynose's tail.

Ashfur's patrol begrudgingly picks up Tawnypelt at the border and takes her family to ThunderClan.

Then Tawnypelt's horrible children trash everything.

"Kids will be kids," says Hollyleaf while they beat up Icepaw.

Apparently morality just absolutely breaks down in the absence of religion in the Warrior Cats universe

so Sol isn't feeding children or old people anymore.

So with the help of Tawnypelt's horrible children the three finish their StarClan sign.

"Whoa, this sign sure is impressive!" says Littlecloud.

"Thanks, we made it," says Raggedstar and Runningnose.

Hollyleaf is offended.

Sol moves out of Shadowclan but that doesn't really matter because now every

cat in ThunderClan has baby disease.

Jaypaw gets pulled into Starclan where

what I believe to be cameo tributes of people who passed away

tell him what to do.

Honestly, the sequence really doesn't make much sense to anyone who would be

reading this book without this context.

I need to stop to be a little bit serious because obviously it would be disrespectful to make too many jokes

about a dead family inserted into Warrior Cats, but basically

a cat named Brightspirit comes down from StarClan to tell Jaypaw

"Hey, WindClan."

And then Jaypaw's like

"Gotcha."

So he immediately wakes up to learn that Firestar has baby disease.

Graystripe asks how his wife is doing and Jaypaw decides to

remind him of that time his first wife died horribly.

Jayfeather realizes what the word 'Windclan' means and decides to harass the dumbest

medicine cat he can think of for herbs.

"Hi Jaypaw!" says Kestrelpaw.

"Am I important now? I can't believe you're actually talking to me!"

"Haha yeah, super important," Says Jaypaw to the character that I had to draw for this scene.

He then uses knowledge acquired in his friends dream to take advantage of

him and steal his clan's catmint stock when he probably could have just asked,

because, you know, one clan attacking another one twice in one series is

pretty much impossible anyways.

He tells Lionblaze he needs to go get the catmint but Lionblaze would rather just let his

entire clan die of baby disease, no big deal.

So Jaypaw decides to be passive-aggressive to Lionblaze until

he does what he wants and breaks the law.

Firestar and Brambleclaw decide to quarantine all the sick people in the shack.

"Just don't forget we're here," says Firestar.

"No promises," says Brambleclaw.

Jaypaw has a last-minute Leafpool-should stop-pretending-to-be-my-mom moment

before going to ask his stick for advice.

This stick, being as helpful as possible in Jaypaw's time of need,

transports him to eighteenth century Scotland.

Instantly, Jaypaw stops caring about his actual life at all

and fully identifies as Jay's Wing, ancient cat with no problems.

He uses his knowledge of events to come and future medicine to win the trust

and admiration of his new family.

Here in the past, everyone is stupid, and everyone is always upset that Fallen Leaves is missing.

And obviously they have no sense of morality because they're not in the cults like Jaypaw is.

Apparently all these past cats think it's nasty that they live near a lake and they want to leave

making it sort of awkward that this was apparently the best place for the cats to go now.

Additionally Jaypaw has every opportunity to tell the

ancient cats that they have no reason to leave and doesn't bother.

Half Moon, somebody that we just met, immediately designates herself

as Jay's overly enthusiastic isekai love interest.

"Hmm I don't love this stranger, but I'm totally up for it," thinks Jaypaw.

The ancient cats decide to have a vote to decided if they want to live in the hell that is the mountains

for no reason or if they want to stay where they were already safe and thriving.

"Jay's Wing saw birds in the mountains, we should go there!" says Fallen Leaves's idiot ex-boyfriend.

This convinces half the cats to go because they'll believe anything.

Because Jaypaw, without any evidence, decides that these cats need to become the tribe

completely arbitrarily, he cast the last vote to have them abandon their perfectly fine

territory to go live in a crappy cave somewhere.

But that's not all,

to explain why he has knowledge from the future

instead of just telling them he was a nurse in World War two, he invents religion.

Jaypaw is just entirely ready to take off with these cats and have a thousand stupid babies in the mountains

with his vaguely forced love interest when Rock pulls him to the side and

tells him his OC is dead now and he's kicked out of the role play.

"We actually already killed the real Jay's Wing," he insists, scooching him into the living world.

Meanwhile Lionblaze is being tormented every night by the ghost of his dead grandpa.

"Hahaha, you don't want to kill Heatherpaw? What a loser!"

Spiderleg catches baby disease, proving that the quarantined cats were just not quarantined enough.

Daisy visits him.

"Hey Spiderleg."

He suddenly realizes that he's cornered in the medicine den.

"When are you going to visit your kids, Spiderleg?"

Leafpool joins in.

"Yeah Spiderleg, you mouse brain piece of dung!

When are you going to visit your hecking kids for once?

No I am NOT taking this personally!"

Spiderleg dies...

inside!

Then Firestar dies, for real.

But he comes back because, uh, staying deads for losers after all.

"Okay, I'll go kill Heatherpaw,"

says Lionblaze after seeing all of this.

"That's, not what I told you to do," responds Jaypaw.

He sneaks over to steal the catmint but Heatherpaw's in the tunnel.

Being Heathertail.

Lionblaze imagines killing her for a minute, but then she just kind of lets him go anticlimactically.

"Whoa!" says Leafpool. "Did Starclan give you that?"

"We stole it," says Jaypaw.

"Cool cool," says Leafpool. "Same though."

Then, like any good and noble medicine cat,

Jaypaw's given his warrior name for cheating and lying.

Brightspirit, who is more special than all of the other dead cats for some reason,

comes back to congratulate him

and then his whirled away by magic fairy dust, never to be seen again.

"Where did Brightspirit go?" Asks Jayfeather.

"Who?" Responds Yellowfang, who was here the whole time.

"Did you just make up a StarClan cat?"

Back at camp, Squirrelflight yells at Ashfur for, eh, interrupting Brambleclaw or something.

Accidentally being put on two patrols because he's too flashy with a stupid hair.

"Weird huh? It's almost like Ashfur and Squirrelflight have unresolved baggage," thinks Jayfeather

"Also did I used to have a sister or am I just thinking of those ancient cats?"

Now that we've remembered that Hollyleaf exists, it's finally time for The Three's first birthday party!

"Surprise!" Shouts ThunderClan as the candles light the forest on fire.

"Oh I knew it!" says Squirrelflight. "Fire alone could ruin this birthday party!"

Everybody runs away leaving Squirrel and her kids trapped in the fire.

Squirrelflight knocks over a tree branch to give them an escape route.

"Oh come on!" Shouts Ashfur, materializing.

"What?"

"This is unrealistic! Cats can't knock over a huge tree!"

"I don't care what's realistic to cats, Ashfur," says Squirrelflight.

"We can talk, we get nine lives."

"My quarrel was never with realism Squirrelflight... it was with immersion! It always has been!"

"This arcs been going on for five books, Ashfur, I had no idea you were upset."

"Upset? I'm not upset you have no idea how much pain I'm in being a Warrior Cats fan."

"Enough Ashfur! Your quarrel is with the authors, don't blame the characters for this!"

"No, this kind of thing would have never happened before this arc. These kits need to die!"

"Fine," responds Squirrelflight. "Kill them. I still have superpowers.

So did Yellowfang and their mother, Leafpool."

"Wait, what?" says everyone.

"Oopsy!" Responds Squirrelflight.

"Okay, well I'm gonna go tell everyone that." Says Ashfur, doing a backflip into the fire.

The Three flip out the entire way back and then continue to flip out for the rest of their lives.

Ashfur asks to attend the gathering which makes them all flip a little bit faster.

Lionblaze tries to talk him out of it but all he does is threatened physical violence and he fails miserably.

Jayfeather tries to talk him out of it in a dream, but it's a dream, so nobody listens.

Hollyleaf doesn't bother trying to talk him out of it because she's angry that she's not special anymore.

Suddenly it's time for the gathering and both Ashfur and Squirrelflight are suspiciously late.

Squirrelflight shows up covered in blood.

She excuses it with the fact that she was helping Leafpool with her leeches.

Then Ashfur's corpse drifts by in the lake.

"Whoa, who would do something like this?!"

shouts Hollyleaf in dismay.