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  • Where would I be without you, Mr. Mittens?

  • It's not a meme; it's a fact:

  • And you don't have nine lives!

  • Do you think you could survive...

  • ...if u has no cheezburger?

  • This is 'What If,'

  • and here's what would happen if there were no more cats.

  • The goddess of war, the king of the jungle,

  • the world's fastest creature, and your home's biggest sleeper.

  • Go ahead and call your cat lazy, but keep in mind,

  • you're talking about the 6th most successful hunting animal in the world.

  • Compare that to the tiger's 5% kill rate,

  • and you'll realize that Millie isn't just a cute, little cuddle monster;

  • she's a deadly assassin.

  • Cats sleep for roughly 16 hours a day, and spend the rest of their time

  • prowling, hunting, practicing, and preparing for the worst:

  • It's not really something we need to worry about,

  • I mean, come on, rats taking over the world?

  • That's impossible!

  • Not in a world without cats!

  • We humans like to give ourselves credit for being innovative and adaptable

  • when it comes to solving the world's biggest problems.

  • And yet, while rats may or may not have

  • spread a plague that killed up to 200 million people,

  • we still haven't come up with a fool-proof way of controlling their numbers.

  • Sure, there are rat traps and rat poisons, but really, cats do most of the work,

  • killing roughly 20 billion small mammals every year.

  • So without them, we'd be sick, starving, and dying fast from cuteness withdrawal.

  • You know rats are gross. But how gross?

  • Put it this way, one rat carries thousands of pathogens on just one centimeter of its fur;

  • and any one of these pathogens could be fatal to you.

  • But what are your chances of getting sick?

  • Well, at the rate rats reproduce, the odds are stacked against you.

  • Did you know that one pair of rats can produce over 2,000 offspring per year?

  • That means that within three years,

  • that same couple could have over half a billion descendants.

  • This isn't your average infestation; it's an epidemic.

  • It's not just rat bites that will make you sick;

  • rat excrement can toxify the air you breathe,

  • causing your lungs to fill with fluid, resulting in a quick death.

  • You might evade the infirmary, but not famine.

  • There's a reason why farmers keep barn cats,

  • and that's to prevent an all-out assault on grain stores!

  • Rats don't just go for cheese; they go for everything.

  • Grain and produce are the staples we need, and the food rats love.

  • Without cats, there's a lot of rat-mouths to feed.

  • Our agricultural systems would collapse,

  • and now with disease rampant, and food scarce,

  • humans would be forced to scrounge for scraps...

  • ...kind of like rats!

  • But humans aren't the only ones who have to worry.

  • Rats are also responsible for 40% and 60% of all seabird and reptile extinctions.

  • So, if we're to stand a chance against this...

  • we've got to band together, hand in paw.

  • Respect your cat, and be grateful for the gifts it leaves on your doorstep.

  • The world would be bleak without their presence!

Where would I be without you, Mr. Mittens?

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B1 中級

猫がいなかったら? (What If There Were No More Cats?)

  • 5 0
    林宜悉 に公開 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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