But it taught an important lesson.

Let me have it.

Okay. But I'm warning you, it is habit-forming.

There is no such thing as a routine surgery.

[ Laughs ]

[ Groans ]

[ Exhales deeply ]

[ Both laughing ]

♪ 'Cause I've waited a long, long time ♪

♪ To remember all that you've done for me ♪

Amelia?

♪ And I'm drawing a long, long line ♪

I think I'm in love with you.

♪

And I know you said not to say it back,

but it's not something I feel very often.

Love is... not really my thing.

Dating, yes.

Fun, yes.

Sex, yes.

Love...leads to divorce.

Leads to pain.

I think that's been my world view.

♪

But I'm feeling it.

I'm pretty sure.

And...

...it's a feeling I like.

It's a feeling I want to name.

♪

Because sometimes people fall out of the sky,

so there's kinda no point in trying to avoid pain.

♪ To remember all that you've done for me ♪

♪

Okay.

♪ In between the dark and the light ♪

Every time I step into an O.R...

I'm ready for the worst.

Hey. Hey.

What -- What are you doing here?

I tried to talk to Bailey.

She thinks I attacked her publicly.

It's -- I don't know.

I don't -- I don't know how to fix this.

I mean, what -- what were you expecting?

We're friends.

I thought our history would earn me some benefit of the doubt.

And I walked off work crew,

so I got a summons to go back to court.

Wait a minute. You walked out?

Well, I had no choice.

Mer, yeah, you did have a choice.

And -- And you chose the thing that could put you in jail.

Why would you do that?

That headline hurt a lot of people.

You once told me I needed to develop

an instinct for self-preservation.

Remember that? That was entirely different.

You were claiming a crime you didn't commit.

Yeah, a-a crime that you committed.

A crime that's now threatening your medical license.

And this is just adding to that threat.

You think the medical board just doesn't read the news?

There isn't anything that I said that wasn't the truth.

It isn't my fault that they packaged it up like a bomb.

Okay, but don't you think that there was a world

where you just finish the community-service hours and came back to work?

I should just shut up and sit on my mountain of privilege?

And leave everyone else to fight their own battles?

Or you work within the broken system to change it

instead of bringing the whole thing down with you.

It's self-destructive, Mer.

You really don't need enemies right now.

No. I don't.

And I don't need this, either.

And if you think there's a world

in which I just sit back while something's broken

and hurting people and killing people...

you don't really know me.

At all.

It's not a guarantee against bad outcomes,

but it does mean, when the curveballs come,

when the sky starts to fall...

[ Knock on door ] ♪ You'll turn your head ♪

♪ Leave me unwanted ♪

Well?

Your blood work indicates that you are perimenopausal...

[ Groans ]

Uh, there was an ellipsis in your voice.

You're also pregnant, Bailey.

I'm sorry?

Your bloodwork shows that --

No.

D-- I-I -- It's hormones.

It's, uh, hot flashes, mood swings.

I'm -- It's menopause.

Yeah, your beta-HCG isn't lying.

You can be perimenopausal and still shed eggs.

I don't understand.

You are both perimenopausal and pregna--

I heard you. I just don't understand.

...hopefully you're less likely

to get completely knocked off your feet.

Please tell me you don't plan to keep this a secret. 00:04:07.664,00:00:00.000 ♪ Please give me space where I can belong ♪