LIKE TO COME AND SEE ONE IN PERSON, YOU CAN HEAD TO 1I

OTA.COM, CLICK ON THE CLINK THAT SAYS THE "LATE, LATE SHOW."

YOU CAN ALSO CHECK OUT PAST EPISODES AND ALL OF OUR CARPOOL

KARAOKE VIDEOS ON OUR YOU TOOB PAGE.

AND, PLEASE DON'T FORGET TO FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER AT “LATE

LATE SHOW.” YOU CAN ALSO HEART ME ON

INSTAGRAM, LINK ME ON LINKED IN, PIN ME ON PINTEREST, SNAP ME ON

SNAPCHAT, MEET ME ON EVERNOTE BLEAT ME ON EVER-GOAT, FIND ME A

DOCTOR ON ZOCDOC, FIND ME A SPEEDO ON JOCKSOCK, SEND ME SOME

CASH ON PAYPAL, REFUSE MY REQUEST ON NOWAYPAL, BUY ME SOME

BOOKS ON AMAZON, BUY ME SOME LARGE PRINT BOOKS ON GRANDMAZON,

STREAM ME A PODCAST ON PODCRUNCHER, FEED ME A

SEA BASS ON CODMUNCHER, DRINK MIMOSAS IN CHURCH ON

GODBRUNCHER, GO STRAIGHT FOR THE CROTCH ON RODPUNCHER, WRITE ME A

CHECK ON WIKIBUY, WEAR A TURTLENECK ON HICKEYGUY, LEAVE

ME A MESSAGE ON AUTOANSWER, HOLD ME CLOSER ON TINYDANCER,

SNUB ME FOR AN OSCAR ON ADAMSANDLER, CAN I BE ANY MORE

ON CHANDLER?

BUY ME SOME SNEAKERS ON HYPEBEAST, BUY ME A ZEBRA ON

STRIPEDBEAST, FIX MY TYPOS ON GRAMMARLY, CAN'T TOUCH THIS ON

MC HAMMERLY, ASK ME ANYTHING ON REDDIT, EXPLAIN THE JOKE ON“

OHHH I GET IT,” SEND ME A MESSAGE ON MARCOPOLO, LIVE

MARCO'S BEST LIFE ON MARCOYOLO, FIND ME A DATE ON BUMBLE, SIT UP

STRAIGHT ON A BUM BALL, FIND ME MUSIC ON SOUNDHOUND, FIND MY

BOOTY ON ROUNDMOUND, PLAN ME A TRIP ON BOOKING.COM, FIND ME A

COUGAR ON REALLY HOT MOM, SLOW ME DOWN ON DYNAMO, SUCKER ME ON

JONASBROS, RELAX AT THE SPA ON DAILY YOGA, MAKE ME GO “AWWW” ON

BABYYODA, OR, IF YOU WISH, FEEL FREE TO, WRITE ME AN OLD

FASHIONED LETTER BY ADDRESSING IT TO TELEVISION CITY STUDIOS,

7800 BEVERLY BOULEVARD, LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA 90036.

YOU'LL TELL ME YOU'RE THINKING OF BECOMING AN ACTOR AND YOUR

DREAM IS TO BE A GUEST ON "THE LATE LATE SHOW" SOMEDAY.

YOU'LL ASK IF I HAVE ANY ADVICE AND I'LL RECOGNIZE A LITTLE BIT

OF MYSELF IN YOU AND WRITE BACK, SAYING THAT IF YOU REALLY WANT

TO BE AN ACTOR, YOU HAVE TO PURSUE IT 100%.

COMPLETELY INSPIRED BY MY WORDS, YOU'LL IMMEDIATELY DROP OUT OF

SCHOOL AND START AUDITIONING NONSTOP.

IT'LL BE HARD AT FIRST, STRUGGLING TO PAY RENT AND EVEN

BUY GROCERIES.

AND THEN WHEN ALL HOPE IS LOST AND THE ONLY THING LEFT IN YOUR

FRIDGE IS A HALF A CAN OF BAKED BEANS, YOU'LL BOOK SOMETHING.

IT'S JUST ONE LINE BUT IT'S AN AARON SORKIN MOVIE AND YOU

FREAKIN' NAIL IT.

OVER THE YEARS, YOU'LL BUILD ON EACH ROLE AND I'LL KEEP TABS

ON YOUR CAREER FROM AFAR, LIKE A PROUD BUT DISTANT FATHER.

EVENTUALLY YOU'LL END UP AS THE LEAD ON THE LATEST CBS

PROCEDURAL ABOUT THE COAST GUARD AND THE PREMIERE WILL DEBUT TO

HUGE RATINGS, WHICH IS NO SURPRISE BECAUSE IT'S ON CBS,

AMERICA'S NUMBER ONE NETWORK.

DURING THE FALL PROMOTIONAL SEASON, OUR SHOW'S BOOKER WILL

REACH OUT TO ME AND SAY, “WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE HIM ON THE

SHOW?” AND I'LL SEE YOUR NAME, SMILE

AND SAY, “YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M NOT SURE HE'S READY YET.”

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE OF THE "LATE, LATE SHOW!"