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  • >> Paul: GOOD.

  • ( Laughter )

  • >> Dave: HOW MANY FOLKS WENT UP

  • TO CENTRAL PARK TODAY?

  • ANY OF YOU GO TO CENTRAL PARK?

  • ( Applause )

  • THERE'S ONE OF THOSE GIANT ART

  • PROJECTS GOING ON, A CREW OF 100

  • WORKERS IS COVERING CENTRAL MARK

  • CENTRAL PARK WITH 25 MILES OF

  • COLORFUL FABRIC.

  • IT'S AMAZING.

  • THE SAME TEAM THAT PUT TOGETHER

  • STAR JONES' WEDDING DRESS.

  • ( Applause )

  • BEAUTIFUL.

  • ♪ ♪

  • >> Dave: THE WEATHER HERE IN NEW

  • YORK CITY IS NICE, VERY PLEASANT

  • VERY MILD TODAY.

  • BUT OUT IN CALIFORNIA, IT'S THE

  • RAINY SEASON IN CALIFORNIA AND

  • THE GOOD NEWS IS THE MUD SLIDES

  • ARE PUTTING OUT THE BRUSHFIRES.

  • SO THAT'S....

  • ( Applause )

  • THAT'S ALWAYS SOMETHING NICE TO

  • HAVE HAPPEN.

  • I DON'T KNOW IF YOU FOLKS HEARD

  • ABOUT THIS.

  • ANOTHER RUMOR OUT OF THE MIDEAST

  • THERE'S RUMORS THAT OSAMA BIN

  • LADEN HAS MOVED TO A MAJOR CITY.

  • ISN'T THAT ODD?

  • APPARENTLY HE PLANS TO KEEP HIS

  • CAVE FOR THE WEEKENDS.

  • (

  • >> Dave: YES.

  • >> Paul: MARVELOUSLY, SIR AND

  • YOU.

  • >> Dave: JUST FINE.

  • LET'S TRY THIS.

  • ( Drumroll )

  • ( Drumroll )

  • ( Applause ) I T BUSINESS, YOU ,

  • THOSE GUYS WITH THE...

  • ( Drumroll )

  • ( Applause ) SHE DOES OR

  • HER LICENSE PLATE.

  • MARIA MENOUNOS IS JOINING US.

  • ( Applause )

  • ♪ ♪

  • >> Dave: WHAT HAPPENED TO THE

  • GROUP MENOUNOS?

  • REMEMBER THE GROUP?

  • >> Paul: THEY GOT TOO OLD AND

  • GOT FIRED.

  • >> Dave: IS THAT RIGHT?

  • WASN'T THAT A BIG DEAL FOR A

  • WHILE, MENOUNOS?

  • >> YOU COULD ONLY BE UP TO 17.

  • I THINK WE'VE DONE IT ONCE

  • BEFORE AND IT WAS A WONDERFUL

  • EXCITING HIT WE ARE GOING TO DO

  • IT AGAIN TONIGHT.

  • A LITTLE SOMETHING CALLED GUESS

  • THE PUDDLE

  • GUESS, GUESS, GUESS

  • GUESS THE PUDDLE

  • >> Dave: GET UP!

  • SGLET.

  • >> Paul: GET DOWN.

  • >> Dave: GET DOWN.

  • >> Paul: GET DOWN.

  • >> Dave: HUP, HUP WAIT A MINUTE.

  • I THINK RUPERT CLOSED.

  • ARE YOU STILL OPEN,UPERT?

  • WE NEED TO YOU GO OUTSIDE AND

  • PICK A CONTESTANT FOR GUESS THE

  • PUDDLE.

  • SOMEBODY REALLY GOOD, SOMEBODY

  • EXCITING.

  • >> Rupert: OKAY, DAVE.

  • >> Dave: WE ARE GOING TO BE

  • PLAYING GUESS THE PUDDLE A

  • LITTLE LATER.

  • WE'LL CHECK BACK IN WITH YOU.

  • RUPERT G, LADIES AND G

  • EN.

  • OWNER OF THE HELLO DELI.

  • HOO-HAH.

  • >> Paul: GET UP.

  • ( Laughter )

  • >> Dave: YOU KNOW, MARTHA

  • STEWART IS GOING TO BE OUT OF

  • THE CAN BEFORE LONG.

  • >> Paul: THAT'S RIGHT.

  • >> Dave: AND I'M VERY EXCITED

  • BECAUSE THEY'RE GIVING HER HER

  • OWN TELEVISION SHOW AND I

  • PREDICT IT IS GOING TO BE AN

  • ENORMOUS HIT AND GO RIGHT UP

  • AGAINST OPRAH.

  • PEOPLE DON'T WANT TO WATCH OPRAH

  • ANYMORE.

  • THEY WANT TO HEAR STORIES ABOUT

  • THE SLAMMER.

  • AND MARTHA WILL HAVE HER CON

  • BUDDIES ON.

  • AND THERE'S NOT A HOUSEWIFE IN

  • AMERICA WHO DOESN'T CRAVE PRISON

  • STORIES.

  • >> Paul: I AGREE WITH THAT.

  • >> Dave: THAT'S WHAT YOU ARE

  • GOING TO GET.

  • BUT ANYWAY, MARTHA STEWART

  • RELEASED AN ANNOUNCEMENT RIGHT

  • AFTER NEW YEAR'S.

  • I SAW IT LAST NIGHT.

  • TAKE A LOOK.

  • >> Announcer: MARTHA STEWART

  • REGRETS THAT SHE HAS ALREADY

  • BROKEN TWO OF HER NEW YEAR'S

  • RESOLUTIONS: LAST NIGHT SHE USED

  • PEPPER FROM A SHAKER INSTEAD OF

  • FRESH GROUND.

  • AND THIS MORNING, SHE STABBED A

  • RIVAL GANG MEMBER IN THE PRISON

  • LAUNDRY.

  • HOPEFULLY THESE LAPSES WON'T

  • HAPPEN AGAIN.ARTHA

  • AND I LOVED HER EVEN BEFORE SHE

  • WENT TO PRISON.

  • AND I WANT TO HAVE HER ON THE

  • SHOW, BUT I'M AFRAID NOW BECAUSE

  • WE'VE MADE THESE JOKES ABOUT HER

  • BEING IN PRISON.

  • SO MANY OF OUR BIG STARS TODAY

  • ARE IN JAIL, AND THEY DON'T...

  • THEY DON'T LIKE IT WHEN YOU POKE

  • FUN AT THEM.

  • SO IT'S HARD ENOUGH FOR TO US

  • GET GUESTS ON THE SHOW WHO

  • HAVEN'T BEEN IN JAIL.

  • >> Paul: I'M HIP.

  • >> Dave: I JUST WONDER IF MARTHA

  • WILL BE ABLE TO COME AND BE ON

  • OUR SHOW.

  • >> Paul: I'M SURE SHE WILL.

  • >> Dave: I HOPE SHE DOES.

  • I WON'T BLAME HER IF SHE FEELS

  • SHE CAN'T BECAUSE I MADE JOKES

  • OF HER.

  • WHEN I GO TO PRISON, I DON'T

  • WANT PEOPLE MAKING JOKES ABOUT

  • ME.

  • THAT'S JUST HUMAN NATURE.

  • >> Paul: I'LL REMEMBER THAT.

  • >> Dave: GET UP, GET DOWN.

  • >> Paul: GET DOWN.

  • >> Dave: GET UP.

  • >> Paul: GET DOWN.

  • >> Dave: BY THE WAY, TALK ABOUT

  • A WONDERFUL SHOW EVERY OVER

  • THERE ON NBC, I RUE THE DAY WE

  • GOT FIRED OUT OF THAT PLACE.

  • ( Laughter )

  • THEY HAVE SOME MARVELOUS

  • PROGRAMS.

  • ONE OVER THERE CALLED THE MEDIUM

  • ON NBC ABOUT A WOMAN WHO IS A

  • DETECTIVE AND SHE TALKS TO DEAD

  • PEOPLE.

  • >> Paul: NO KIDDING.

  • >> Dave: IT'S A RUNAWAY

  • BLOCKBUSTER.

  • YOU ARE GOING TO SEE SHOWS LIKE

  • THIS EVERYWHERE.

  • A SHOW CALLE MEDIUM ON NBC.

  • WATCH THIS PROMO.

  • >> Announcer: NBC MONDAY IS MORE

  • SUSPENSEFUL THAN EVER WITH THE

  • NEW DRAMA MEDIUM, A SUBURBAN

  • MOTHER BY DAY, A SUPER NATURAL

  • SLEUTH BY NIGHT, ALISON DUBOIS

  • SOLVES THE CRIMES NO ONE ELSE

  • CAN BY TALKING TO THE DEAD.

  • DON'T MISS THE NEXT STAR STUDDED

  • EPISODE AS ALISON GETS CLUES

  • FROM SPECIAL DEAD GUEST STARS,

  • LORNE GREEN, NBC.

  • >> Dave: THAT'S GOT HIT WRITTEN

  • ALL OVER IT.

  • >> Paul: DUDE.

  • ( Applause )

  • SGLOD HERE'S SOMETHING YOU DON'T

  • SEE A LOT OF ON TV. Dave: GOOD.

  • TONIGHT YOUR LUCK CONTINUES

  • BECAUSE YOU'RE HERE TO PLAY

  • GUESS THE PUDDLE

  • GUESS, GUESS, GUESS

  • THE PUDDLE

  • >> Dave: ALL RIGHT.

  • ALAN HEADQUARTERS WHAT IS SARAH

  • PLAYING FOR TONIGHT ON GUESS THE

  • LE.

  • >> Alan: A CUISINART RICE

  • COOKER.

  • >> Dave: ARE YOU GOING TO TELL

  • US WHAT THE PUDDLE IS?

  • >> Alan: I AM.

  • >> Dave: DON'T LISTEN.

  • ALAN IS GOING TO TELL THE HOME

  • VIEWERS WHAT THE PUDDLE IS.

  • >>.

  • >> Alan: IT'S OATMEAL.

  • >> Dave: THANK YOU VERY MUCH,

  • ALAN.

  • SAR REMARKS RUPERT, RUPERT HAS

  • THE MONITOR RIGHT THERE AND WE

  • ARE GOING TO SHOW YOU A SHOT OF

  • THE PUDDLE ON 53rd STREET.

  • LET SARAH SEE WHAT THE PUDDLE

  • IS.

  • THAT'S THE PUDDLE IN FRONT OF

  • RUPERT'S.

  • IT'S USUALLY THERE EVERY DAY.

  • IT CHANGES AND IF YOU WOULD LIKE

  • I THINK WE HAVE 30 SECONDS TO

  • GUESS THE PUDDLE.

  • IF WOULD YOU LIKE, YOU CAN GO

  • OUTSIDE AND TAKE A LOOK AT IT IN

  • PERSON.

  • >> I WOULD ENJOY THAT.

  • >> Dave: SHE IS GOING TO GO

  • OUTSIDE AND LOOK AT THE PUDDLE

  • IN PERSON.

  • DID WE START THE CLOCK?

  • IS THERE A CLOCK ON THIS?

  • SHE'S TOUCHING IT.

  • DON'T TOUCH THE PUDDLE.

  • OH, MY GOD!

  • GOOD LORD.

  • SHE TOUCHED THE PUDDLE.

  • YOU CAN TELL SHE'S FROM

  • CALIFORNIA.

  • SHE MADE... SHE MADE THE ONE

  • CARDINAL MISTAKE OF NEW YORK

  • CITY LIFE.

  • SHE TOUCHED THE PUDDLE.

  • ALL RIGHT.

  • SAR REMARKS DO YOU THINK HAVE

  • YOU AN IDEA WHAT THE PUDDLE IS?

  • >> I HAVE AN IDEA OF ONE OF THE

  • COMPONENTS.

  • >> Dave: GO AHEAD.

  • >> I THINK WE ARE LOOKING AT

  • SOME KIND OF OATMEAL.

  • >> Dave: EXACTLY RIGHT.

  • TREMENDOUS.

  • ( Applause )

  • CONGRATULATIONS.

  • NOW YOU'VE WON THE RICE COOKER.

  • RUPERT, DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING FOR

  • HER?

  • >> Rupert: UM.

  • ( Laughter )

  • >> Dave: NICE GOING.

  • BUT THAT'S NOT ALL.

  • WHAT ELSE DO WE HAVE, GIRLS?

  • BRING IT IN.

  • THE RICE COOKER AND THE HELLO

  • DELI PLATTER.

  • >> I'M A HAPPY VEGETARIAN.

  • >> Dave: THERE WE GO.

  • RIGHT ON THE MONEY WITH THAT

  • OATMEAL.

  • >> Paul: SHE'S NOT EVEN FROM

  • THIS TOWN.

  • >> Dave: NO.

  • ( Applause )

  • IT REMINDS ME... THE HAWAII 5-0

  • SHOW, AND THE GUY WOULD DIP INTO

  • SOMETHING, BOOK HIM, DANNO.

  • YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO DO THAT

  • IN ANY EVENT.

  • >> Paul: I WOULD NEVER DO IT.

  • BUT MY NEW YEAR'S SO FAR IS

  • GOING VERY WELL.

  • ( Laughter )

  • >> Dave: ETH ETHAN HAWKE IS ON E

  • PROGRAM.

  • MARIA MENOUNOS AND ALICIA KEYS.

  • NOW A LOT OF TIMES ON THIS SHOW,

  • YOU'LL HEAR ME COMMENT ABOUT

  • OPRAH, AND PEOPLE SAY WELL ARE

  • YOU FIXATED WITH OPRAH?

  • YOU SEEM TO HAVE SOME KIND OF

  • OBSESSION WITH OPRAH.

  • WHAT'S THE DEAL?

  • WHY CAN'T YOU LEAVE OPRAH ALONE.

  • I'LL TELL YOU TRUTHFULLY.

  • THE REASON I'M' FASCINATED WITH

  • OPRAH, ONE, SHE IS THE MOST

  • POWERFUL WOMAN IN THE WORLD,

  • MAYBE THE MOST POWERFUL PERSON

  • IN THE WORLD.

  • NUMBER TWO, SHE IS A NATIONAL

  • TREASURE AND OTHER REASONS I

  • CAN'T THINK OF RIGHT NOW.

  • >> Paul: OKAY.

  • >> Dave: BUT YOU KNOW, AND VERY

  • SUCCESSFUL WITH HER TV SHOW AND

  • SO WE, YOU KNOW, THIS IS JUST A

  • LITTLE NICKEL AND DIME DOG AND

  • PONY THING WE GOT HERE.

  • WE TRY TO LEARN FROM OPRAH AND

  • WHAT OPRAH HAS DONE, AFTER HER

  • SHOW SHUTS OFF FOR THE DAY, WHAT

  • YOU FOLKS MAY NOT KNOW, OPRAH

  • DOESN'T LEAVE.

  • SHE IS STILL IN YOUR TELEVISION

  • BUT YOU CAN'T SEE HER.

  • SHE IS DOING WHAT THEY CALL THE

  • OPRAH AFTER SHOW.

  • >> Paul: OPRAH AFTER THE SHOW.

  • >> Dave: THEY LET THE CAMERAS

  • ROLL AND THE GUESTS CAN COME AND

  • GO,, AND THEY HAVE REFRESHMENTS

  • AND OWE EXTRA PUTS HER FEET UP

  • UNDER HER AND TAKES HER SHOES

  • OFF, NOT IN THAT ORDER AND THE

  • AUDIENCE CAN... SO PAUL HAS BEEN

  • AFTER ME FOR A LONG TIME, SAID

  • DAVE, WHY DON'T WE DO THIS.

  • >> Paul: EXACTLY.

  • >> Dave: WHY DON'T WE HAVE AN

  • AFTER.

  • ( Applause )

  • >> Paul: THE AUDIENCE AGREES.

  • DAVE AFTER THE SHOW.

  • WHERE YOU WOULD JUST RELAX,

  • KICKBACK.

  • >> Dave: EXACTLY.

  • WHATEVER HAPPENS.

  • IT'S FREE FORM.

  • BY THE WAY, I HEARD SOMETHING

  • STUNNING THE OTHER DAY.

  • YOU KNOW THOSE GUYS THAT WON THE

  • PRIZE FOR GOING INTO OUTER SPACE

  • THE CIVILIANS, THE BIG SPACE

  • THING.

  • >> Paul: THEY SHOT A ROCKET.

  • >> Dave: AND IT WORKED AND THEY

  • GOT THE DOUGH.

  • NOW THEY'RE GOING TO BE GIVING

  • SPACE RIDES TO THE MOON.

  • CIVILIANS CAN SIGN UP.

  • GUESS WHO IS NUMBER ONE ON THE

  • LIST?

  • >> Paul: NOT OPRAH.

  • >> Dave: OPRAH.

  • >> Paul: SHE IS GOING TO GO INTO

  • SPACE WITH AMATEURS.

  • >> Dave: THAT'S RIGHT.

  • >> Paul: I WOULDN'T DO IT WITH

  • PROS.

  • THAT'S AMAZING.

  • >> Dave: SO WE'VE DONE THAT

  • TONIGHT, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.

  • HERE'S THE SECOND IN OUR

  • BRAND-NEW SERIES, "THE LATE

  • SHOW" AFTER THE SHOW.

  • TAKE A LOOK.

  • ( Applause )

  • >> Dave: NAKED, MY MOTHER, YOU

  • COULD TELL SHE MANIPULATED THEM.

  • TO GET AT LEAST A B AVERAGE.

  • >> Dave: WHAT DO YOU MAKE NOW IN

  • YOUR ADULT LIFE?

  • >> I DON'T KNOW.

  • WHAT KIND DO YOU MAKE?

  • >> Dave: WELL, I'VE ONLY MADE

  • THE ONE FOR THIS YEAR AND THAT'S

  • TO USE IN CONVERSATION ON THE

  • SHOW, THE WORD SNARKY.

  • I'VE HAD GOOD LUCK WITH THAT

  • RESOLUTION.

  • >> ODDLY ENOUGH, SNARKY IS A

  • REAL PRIORITY ON MY LIST FOR

  • THIS YEAR AS WELL.

  • >> Dave: WHAT KIND OF FAMILY DO

  • YOU COME FROM?

  • A BIG FAMILY, SMALL FAMILY.

  • >> THE CLASSIC, I THINK, MODERN

  • AMERICAN FAMILY, WHICH IS KIND

  • OF SEVERAL MARRIAGES AND SPREAD

  • OUT ALL OVER THE COUNTRY.

  • BUT A

  • GANG...

  • >> WE'RE KEEPING TRACK... WE ARE

  • NOT KEEPING TRACK.

  • WE HAVE A GANGSTER IN OUR PRISON

  • ON NEW YEAR'S EVE AND SOME

  • PEOPLE COME TO TRY TO BREAK HIM

  • OUT ON NEW YEAR'S EVE.

  • >> Dave: YOU FIND OUT THE PEOPLE

  • TRYING TO BREAK HIM OUT ALSO

  • HAPPEN TO BE POLICE OFFICERS.

  • DID I JUST GIVE AWAY SOMETHING.

  • >> I WAS JUST THINKING THAT

  • THOUGHT.

  • >> Dave: I'M SORRY.

  • >> Paul: I WAS GOING TO GO SEE

  • IT.

  • NOW I DON'T HAVE TO SEE IT.

  • ( Applause )

  • >> Dave: I'M TERRIBLY SORRY.

  • >> THERE ARE OTHER INTERESTING

  • ELEMENTS.

  • IT'S ALL RIGHT.

  • YOU CAN STILL GO SEE IT, JUST GO

  • 20 MINUTES LATE.

  • NO PROBLEM.

  • >> Dave: AND BEFORE THE JOHN

  • CARPENTER FILM, WAS IT

  • DERIVATIVE OF...

  • >>.

  • >> DIDN'T YOU JUST SAY JANUARY

  • 19?

  • >> Dave: THE CLIP.

  • >> THE PRISONERS AND THE COPS

  • HAVE TO FIGHT TOGETHER TO FIGHT

  • THE NEMESIS WHO WE DON'T KNOW

  • WHO THEY ARE BUT YOU JUST TOLD

  • THEM THAT THEY'RE COPS BUT

  • THAT'S OKAY.

  • IT DOESN'T MATTER.

  • ( Applause )

  • >> Dave: I'LL TRY TO MAKE IT UP

  • TO YOU SOMEHOW.

  • "ASSAULT ON PRECINCT 13" AND

  • THAT THING I SAID ABOUT THE

  • OTHER GUY BEING A COP MAY OR MAY

  • NOT BE TRUE.

  • >> NOW THAT I THINK BACK ABOUT

  • MAKING THE MOVIE, I DON'T THINK

  • THAT IS WHAT HAPPENED.

  • >> Dave: I'M THINKING OF ANOTHER

  • FILM I THINK ALL

  • HOW DO YOU DO?

  • >> I'M GREAT.

  • HOW ARE YOU.

  • >> Dave: I'M FINE.

  • A PLEASURE TO MEET.

  • >> YOU BY THE WAY, IT WAS MENUDO

  • NOT MENOUNOS.

  • >> Dave: HOW DUMB AM I.

  • I SCREWED UP THE FILM AND I GOT

  • THIS WRONG, TOO.E SAID WHAT IS H

  • YOU.

  • I SAID I BROKE MY TOE.

  • HE SAID THAT IS SO THE

  • CHARACTER.

  • THAT IS SO JULES.

  • >> Dave: WHAT DOES ONE TREE HILL

  • REFER YOU TO.

  • >> WHERE THEY'RE FROM.

  • >> Dave: THE NAME OF A TOWN?

  • >> YES.

  • >> Dave: WHAT GOES ON THERE?

  • ( CACKLING NOISE )

  • ( Laughter )

  • >> Dave: WELL I THINK SOMEONE IS

  • TAMPERING WITH YOUR CAR.

  • >> Paul: I BETTER GO.

  • >> WELL, SOME OF THE CHARACTERS

  • GO TO HIGH SCHOOL AND THE OTHER

  • CHARACTERS HAVE....

  • >> Dave: DO YOU GO TO HIGH

  • SCHOOL?

  • >> NO.

  • NO.

  • I'M AN ADULT.

  • >> Dave: I SEE.

  • ( Laughter )

  • ( Applause )

  • ALL RIGHT.

  • SO SOME OF THE PEOPLE...

  • >> I SWORE I WASN'T GOING TO

  • LAUGH, MARK SCHWANN SAID PLEASE

  • DO NOT LAUGH ON THE SHOW

  • TONIGHT.

  • >> Dave: IS IT A FUNNY SHOW.

  • >> IT'S A DRAMAED.

  • >> Dave: SO IT'S LIKE AN HOUR

  • LONG.

  • >> YES, AND IT'S ON THE WB AND

  • OUR NEW SEASON STARTS JANUARY

  • 25.

  • >> Dave: AND EVERY WEEK WE GET

  • TO SEE WHAT GOES ON WITH THE

  • LIVES OF THE PEOPLE.

  • >> OF ONE TREE HILL.

  • IT'S THE NUMBER ONE SHOW FOR

  • FEMALES 18 TO 30 SOMETHING.

  • AND DID I MENTION THAT WE START

  • BACK UP AGAIN ON JANUARY 25?

  • ( Laughter )

  • I GOT TO STOP.

  • >> Dave: WOW.

  • >> HI.

  • >> Dave: I WONDER IF YOU COULD

  • GET THAT FIXED.

  • ( Laughter )

  • NO, NO.

  • BY THE WAY, IS MARY HART STILL

  • ON ENTERTAINMENT TONIGHT.

  • >> YES, SHE IS.

  • YOU SHOULD TUNE IN SOMETIME.

  • >> Dave: SHE'S BEEN THERE

  • FOREVER.

  • I KIND OF GOT MY HANDS FULL

  • HERE.

  • GREAT PLEASURE MEETING YOU.

  • THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

  • HAPPY NEW YEAR.

  • >> MY DAD LOVES YOU.

  • >>

  • >> Alan: IF YOU'D LIKE BLOW TO--

  • IF YOU'D LIKE DAVE TO BLOW THE

  • SURPRISE ENDING TO YOUR

  • HOLLYWOOD BLOCKBUSTER FILM, COME

  • ON DOWN TO "THE LATE SHOW."

  • WE HAVE PLENTY OF OPENINGS.

  • DON'T FORGET TO BRING A CLIP.

  • MAYBE DAVE CAN SCREW THAT UP,

>> Paul: GOOD.

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レイトショー・ウィズ・デイヴィッド・レターマン - イーサン・ホーク/マリア・メノウヌス (Late Show with David Letterman - Ethan Hawke/Maria Menounus)

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    VoiceTube に公開 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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