Placeholder Image

字幕表 動画を再生する

  • WELCOME TO "THE LATE SHOW."

  • AND WELCOME TO A WHOLE NEW WORLD, BECAUSE IT TURNS OUT THAT

  • HILARIOUS "DONALD TRUMP RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT" THING?

  • HE MEANT IT!

  • ( LAUGHTER ) NOW, I DON'T KNOW HOW MANY OF

  • YOU HAVE TALK SHOWS-- JUST ME.

  • BUT FOR ME, THIS IS A REAL MIXED BLESSING. YOU SEE-- AND THIS IS

  • TRUE-- WHEN TRUMP ANNOUNCED HE WAS RUNNING BACK IN JUNE, IT WAS

  • A FEW MONTHS BEFORE THIS SHOW STARTED.

  • AND WE WERE SO CONVINCED IT WOULDN'T LAST, THAT WE RUSHED TO

  • MAKE A VIDEO TO PUT ON THE INTERNET SO WE WOULDN'T MISS A

  • CHANCE TO MAKE JOKES ABOUT HIM ( LAUGHTER )

  • TURNS OUT WE HAD NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT-- EXCEPT FOR ALL THE

  • THINGS WE HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT- ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

  • BECAUSE DONALD TRUMP WILL BE THE FIRST MAJOR PARTY NOMINEE WHO

  • HASN'T HELD PREVIOUS OFFICE SINCE GENERAL DWIGHT EISENHOWER.

  • EISENHOWER: FACED DOWN HITLER IN WORLD WAR II.

  • TRUMP: FACED DOWN GILBERT GOTTFRIED AT HIS COMEDY CENTRAL

  • ROAST.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) ( APPLAUSE )

  • AND IT'S FITTING THAT WE FOUND OUT TODAY, MAY THE FOURTH, WHEN

  • "STAR WAR FANS GREET EACH OTHER BY SAYING, "MAY THE FOURTH BE

  • WITH YOU."

  • BECAUSE A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE WAKING UP SAYING "WHAT THE

  • FOURTH IS HAPPENING?" LAST NIGHT, TRUMP GAVE A VICTORY

  • SPEECH WHERE HE PROMISED TO BRING THIS COUNTRY TOGETHER.

  • >> THIS COUNTRY, WHICH IS VERY, VERY DIVIDED IN SO MANY

  • DIFFERENT WAYS, IS GOING TO BECOME ONE BEAUTIFUL, LOVING

  • COUNTRY.

  • AND WE'RE GOING TO LOVE EACH OTHER.

  • WE'RE GOING TO CHERISH EACH OTHER.

  • WE'RE GOING TO TAKE CARE OF EACH OTHER.

  • >> Stephen: YES, WE'RE GOING TO LOVE EACH OTHER, CHERISH EACH

  • OTHER-- BASICALLY ALL THE THINGS YOU DO WHEN YOU THINK THE WORLD

  • IS GOING TO END.

  • LOVE AND CHERISH, PRECIOUSGOTTA HAVE LOVE IN YOUR HEART

  • ♪ >> Stephen: JUST GOTTA LOVE.

  • NO DOUBT THERE WILL BE A LOT OF "TRUMP MIGHT BE PRESIDENT" SEX.

  • AND HE DIDN'T JUST GIVE VAGUE, MEANINGLESS-- IT'S OVER.

  • MY TONGUE HAS ALREADY LEFT FOR CANADA AT THIS POINT.

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) HE DIDN'T JUST GIVE US VAGUE,

  • MEANINGLESS PROMISES.

  • HE ALSO GAVE US SPECIFIC MEANINGLESS PROMISES.

  • >> WE'RE GOING TO WORK TOGETHER FOR MANY, MANY YEARS.

  • WE'RE GOING TO MAKE IT SO GOOD.

  • WE'RE GOING TO BE SAYING MERRY CHRISTMAS AGAIN, AND WE'RE

  • GOING TO BE SAYING IT.

  • >> Stephen: YES, WE'LL BE SAYING MERRY CHRISTMAS AGAIN.

  • IN FACT, I AM GOING TO START SAYING IT RIGHT NOW BECAUSE I'M

  • NOT SURE WE'RE GOING TO MAKE IT TO DECEMBER.

  • ( LAUGHTER ) MERRY CHRISTMAS, EVERYBODY!

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) MERRY CHRISTMAS!

  • MERRY CHRISTMAS!

  • LAST NIGHT, TRUMP WAS VERY PRESIDENTIAL, EVEN OFFERING AN

  • EARLY OLIVE BRANCH TO HIS FORMER RIVAL.

  • >> AND JUST SO YOU UNDERSTAND TED CRUZ-- I DON'T KNOW IF HE

  • LIKES ME OR IF HE DOESN'T LIKE ME.

  • >> Stephen: I CAN ANSWER THAT ONE!

  • CAN I?

  • I KNOW THIS ONE!

  • A TRUMP NOMINATION IS JUST SO HARD TO PROCESS.

  • THIS FEELS LIKE A POLITICAL SHIFT OF BIBLICAL PROPORTIONS,

  • LIKE AN ACT OF GOD.

  • BUT WHY WOULD A LOVING GOD LET THIS HAPPEN?

  • LET'S FIND OUT.

  • GOD?

  • GOD?

  • ARE YOU THERE?

  • >> YES, YES, I'M HERE, STEPHEN.

  • I'M HERE.

  • HOW ARE YOU?

  • HOW'S IT GOING.

  • GREAT-LOOKING CROWD YOU GOT DOWN THERE.

  • HELLO, NEW YORK!

  • MERRY CHRISTMAS!

  • HO-HO-HO!

  • MERRY CHRISTMAS.

  • >> Stephen: WELL PANDERED, GOD, WELL PANDERED.

  • >> IT'S WHAT I DO.

  • I WANT PEOPLE TO LIKE ME.

  • >> Stephen: NOW GOD, I HAVE A DIFFICULT QUESTION FOR YOU.

  • >> WELL, STEPHEN, WHEN A MAN LOVES A WOMAN VERY MUCH, THEY

  • EXCHANGE A SPECIAL HUG AND THEN...

  • >> Stephen: NO, NO, NO, GOD, NOT THAT QUESTION.

  • >> GOOD, CAUSE IT GETS PRETTY ICKY AFTER THAT.

  • >> Stephen: GOD, WHY DID YOU LET DONALD TRUMP BE THE REPUBLICAN

  • NOMINEE?

  • >> THE WHAT?

  • SHUT THE FRONT DOOR!

  • NO WAY!

  • THE GUY WITH WEIRD HAIR WHO SOLD STEAKS AT THE SHARPER IMAGE?

  • >> Stephen: YES.

  • HAVEN'T YOU BEEN FOLLOWING THE ELECTION?

  • >> OH, MY GOD.

  • HERE'S THE WORST.

  • TEACHEN, I'VE BEEN PRETTY BUSY TO FOLLOWING THE ELECTION.

  • I'VE BEEN DEALING WITH A SUPERNOVA IN ANOTHER GALAXY.

  • I HAVE GOT TO DECIDE WHO WINS THE NBA FINALS.

  • WHAT HAPPENED TO JEB?

  • I THOUGHT HE WAS A SURE THING.

  • >> Stephen: A LOT OF PEOPLE DID.

  • A LOT OF PEOPLE THOUGHT THAT.

  • HE WASN'T.

  • IT'S GOING TO BE TRUMP.

  • >> WHAT IS WITH YOU PEOPLE?

  • I GIVE YOU FREE WILL, AND YOU NOMINATE A GUY WHO LOOKS LIKE A

  • MICROWAVED CIRCUS PEANUT ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )

  • OKAY, THAT'S IT.

  • THAT IS IT.

  • I'M TAKING AWAY YOUR OPPOSABLE THUMBS.

  • BYE-BYE, THUMBS.

  • GOOD LUCK MAKING TOOLS!

  • >> Stephen: PLEASE, NO!

  • DON'T GIVE UP ON US YET.

  • TRUMP MAY NOT BE PRESIDENT.

  • HE STILL HAS TO BEAT HILLARY OR BERNIE SANDERS.

  • >> BERNIE SANDERS?

  • THAT GUY'S OLDER THAN I AM.

  • TO HELL WITH THIS.

  • I'M MOVING TO CANADA.

  • GOD OUT!

  • MERRY CHRISTMAS!

  • ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) >> Stephen: WAIT!

  • WAIT!

  • WAIT!

WELCOME TO "THE LATE SHOW."

字幕と単語

ワンタップで英和辞典検索 単語をクリックすると、意味が表示されます

B1 中級

なぜ神はトランプを許すのか? (Why Would God Let Trump Happen?)

  • 43 3
    VoiceTube に公開 2021 年 01 月 14 日
動画の中の単語