Rapunzel was a beautiful girl with exceptionally long,

blonde hair, who was kept prisoner in a

tower by an evil witch.

The only person who visited Rapunzel was the witch, who

gained access to the tower by climbing Rapunzel's long hair

like a rope.

In that tower, the witch ran a fetish website starring

Rapunzel for guys who are into chicks with really long hair.

Rapunzel had thousands of devoted fans who would

masturbate furiously every time she would do

anything to her hair.

A prince who was also an obsessed Rapunzel fan went out

to search for her.

He came upon a tower where he saw the witch call out to the

small window above, "Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your hair."

A long rope of hair was lowered from the window, and

the witch used it to climb up to the top.

The prince got so hot, he dropped his pants right there.

When the witch left, the prince walked over to the

tower and spoke the same words.

"Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your hair." When he got to the

top of the tower, he told Rapunzel he was her biggest

fan and that he thought she was great.

He told her that they were soul mates, and that he loved

her, and wanted to marry her.

While saying all of this, he found enough time to have sex

with her hair.

Twice!

When the prince started to lower himself down with

Rapunzel's hair, the witch spotted

him and became furious.

When the prince was out of sight, the witch called for

Rapunzel to lower her hair.

While the witch was climbing Rapunzel's hair, she was

becoming even more furious, as she was getting the prince's

jizz all over her.

And we all know how hard that is to get out.

The witch was so angry that she cut off all of Rapunzel's

hair, banished her to the woods, and forced her to live

inside a hollowed out log.

The next day, the prince came back for a quickie.

When he got inside the tower, he saw the hair was no longer

attached to Rapunzel.

And the witch was laughing and laughing at him.

The prince went all Jack Bauer on her ass.

Even though she was an old woman, he punched her in the

face as hard as he could at least 30 times.

He grabbed a stone from the floor and began banging her

head with it.

Blood gushed in every direction.

He then tore her spine and skull from her body and swung

them over his head, just like in that movie Predator.

I forgot to mention that the prince has

kind of a bad temper.

Prince jumped out of the little window and

sprained his ankle.

He must have said [BLEEP]

at least 500 times as he limped to the place where

Rapunzel was hiding.

When he saw Rapunzel with her short hair, he was no longer

attracted to her, and suggested that they see other

people.

"But I thought you loved me," said Rapunzel.

"Yeah, I say shit like that a lot.

Good luck with your hollow log thing."

Rapunzel cried and cried.

Then all of a sudden, her hair grew back.

She decided to return to the adult film industry, and won

AVN Starlet of the Year Award for Rapunzel and the Mandango

Gangbang, which remains a classic to this very day.

Come back next time, when you'll hear the fable of the

princess who stepped on a landmine.