SOME CHUCK MANJION, JON.

SOME CHUCK MANJION, JON.

SAY HELLO TO JON BATISTE.

ジョン・バティステによろしく。

>> Jon: WHERE YOU ARE?

>> ジョン：どこにいるの？

WHERE YOU AT?

どこにいる？

WHERE YOU AT?

どこにいる？

>> Stephen: I'M RIGHT HERE.

>> スティーブン私はここにいる

DID THOSE BISCUITS WORK OUT?

ビスケットはうまくいったのか？

>> Jon: MAN, IT WAS SO HOOKED UP, MAN.

>> ヨン: MAN, IT WAS SO HOOKED UP, MAN.

HAVING THANKSGIVING, JUST ME AND MY LADIES, IT'S CRAZY TO HAVE SO

感謝祭をしていると、私と私の女性たちだけで、それはそう持っていることがクレイジーです。

MUCH FOOD.

MUCH FOOD。

>> Stephen: DID YOU SAY, "ME AND MY LADIES IN?

>> スティーブン：「俺と俺の女が入った」って言ったか？

DID YOU SAY MULTIPLE LADIES?

複数の女性って言った？

>> Jon: NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.

>> ジョン：いやいやいや。

JUST ONE.

JUST ONE.

WE HAD 20 BISQUE I WANTS FOR TWO PEOPLE.

WE HAD 20 BISQUE I WANTS FOR TWO PEOPLE.

>> Stephen: I THINK-- I THINK WE GOT THEM MIXED UP.

>> スティーブン：私は...私はそれらが混同されていると思う。

I THINK YOU GOT MY BISCUIT ORDER, BECAUSE I HAD 10

私のビスケットの注文を受けたと思うわ 10個持ってたから

BISCUITS, AND I HAD SIX PEOPLE.

ビスケット、そして私には6人の人間がいました。

SO, OKAY.

分かったわ

I HOPE YOU ATE THEM ALL, THOUGH.

I HOPE YOU ATE THEM ALL, THOUGH.

>> Jon: NO, MAN, THANK YOU.

>> ジョン：いや、MAN, THANK YOU.

I REALLY, REALLY APPRECIATE THAT.

本当に、本当に感謝しています。

>> Stephen: I'M GLAD.

>> スティーブンI'M GLAD.

IT MAKES ME HAPPY TO KNOW YOU HAD THEM.

IT MAKES ME HAPPY TO KNOW YOU HAD THEM.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING.

ＨＡＰＰＰＹ ＴＨＡＮＫＳＧＩＶＩＶＩＮＧです。

LET'S DO SOME MORE.

もっとやりましょう

>> Jon: HAPPY THANKSGIVING.

>> ジョン：ＨＡＰＰＰＹ ＴＨＡＮＫＳＧＩＶＩＶＩＮＧ。

AND WE HAVE THE CAROL SEASON NOW.

AND WE HAVE THE CAROL SEASON NOW.

YOU SEE THAT?

見たか？

IT'S CAROL TIME.

カロールタイムだ

>> Stephen: YOU HAVE A KALE FOR THE PEOPLE.

>> スティーブン：あなたは国民のためのケールを持っています。

>> Jon: MAN, WHAT'S SOME GOOD ONES?

>> ジョン：MAN, WHAT'SOME GOOD ONES?

THAT'S WHAT GOOD PUBLIC DOMAINS ONE?

THAT'S WHAT GOOD PUBLIC DOMAINS ONE?

>> Stephen: "OH, COME, OCOME, EMANUEL."

>> スティーブン「OH, COME, OCOME, EMANUEL.

YOU KNOW THAT ONE?" >> Jon: OH, YEAH.

"知ってるのか？">> ジョンOH, YEAH.

♪ ♪ ♪ >> Stephen: JON BATISTE,

♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ >> スティーブンＪＯＮ ＢＡＴＩＳＴＥ

EVERYBODY.

すべての人に。

THANK YOU, JON.

THANK YOU, JON.

YOU KNOW, MOST DAYS, I GATHER ONLY THE FINEST PIECES OF NEWS

YOU KNOW, MOST DAYS, I GATHER ONLY THE FINEST PIECES OF NEWS

IVORY FROM THE CARGO HOLD OF MY TOPICAL WHALING BOAT AND

話題のホーリングボートの貨物倉からのアボリーと

METICULOUSLY CRAFT THEM INTO THE BEAUTIFUL, ELABORATE

METICULOUSLY CRAFT THEM INTO THE BEAUTIFUL, ELABORATE

SATIRICAL SCRIMSHAW THAT IS MY MONOLOGUE.

"サティリカル・スクリムショー" "それが私のモノローグです

BUT NOW AND THEN, I LIKE TO JUST SHOVE MY UNGLOVED HAND INTO THE

でも、たまには、手袋をしていない手を、そのまま、手の中に突っ込んでみるのが好きです。

JOURNALISTIC TROUGH OF FISH GUTS, PULL OUT SOME SALTY,

JOURNALISTIC TROUGH OF FISH GUTS, PULL OUT SOME SALTY.

DISCARDED HEADLINE HUNKS, THEN GRIND THEM UP AND SCRAPE THEM

捨てられたヘッドラインハンクス、それを粉砕して切り刻む。

INTO THE CHUM BUCKET OF NEWS THAT IS MY SEGMENT:

INTO THE CHUM BUCKET OF NEWS THAT IS MY SEGMENT:

>> "QUARANTINEWHILE."

>> "QUARANTINEWHILE.

>> Stephen: QUARANTINEWHILE, BAD NEWS FOR SANTA-CON, THE ANNUAL

>> スティーブンクワランティン・ウェイレ、サンタコンの悪いニュース、年次の

BAR CRAWL THAT DRAWS "AN ESTIMATED 30,000 SANTAS, OFTEN

BAR CRAWL THAT DRAWS "AN ESTIMATED 30,000 SANTAS, OFTEN "を描いています。

LEADING TO PUBLIC URINATING, FIGHTS, AND SANTAS PASSING

泌尿器科、試合、サンタスのパッシングへの指導

OUT IN SUBWAY STATIONS."

OUT IN SUBWAY STATIONS."

BECAUSE NEW YORK'S SANTA-CON HAS BEEN CANCELED BY COVID-19."

"BECAUSE NEW YORK'S SANTA-CON HAS BEEN CANCELED BY COVID-19"

SO JUST TO BE CLEAR: YOU AND YOUR FAMILY, WHO WENT AHEAD WITH

SO JUST TO BE CLEAR: YOU AND YOUR FAMILY, WHO WENT AHEAD WITH

THANKSGIVING, ARE LESS RESPONSIBLE THAN 30,000 WASTED

感謝の気持ちを込めて、30,000人を無駄にしてしまったことに責任を感じていませんか？

SANTAS.

サンタス

BUT PERHAPS NOT A HUGE LOSS TO THE CITY GIVEN THE VISIONS OF

BUT PERHAPS NOT A HUGE LOSS TO THE CITY GIVEN THE VISIONS OF

SANTA-CONS-PAST.

SANTA-CONS-PAST.

( HORNS BEEPING ) ♪ VIOLENT FIGHTS

( HORNS BEEPING ) ♪ VIOLENT FIGHTS

SANTA BITES ♪ CUZ HE'S BLITZED

サンタ・バイツ ♪CUZ HE'S BLITZED

ON 12 BUD LIGHTS ♪ SOUND BETTER IN GERMAN.

ON 12 BUD LIGHTS ♪ SOUND BETTER IN GERMAN.

SO, KIDS, REMEMBER, IF YOU'RE NAUGHTY, SANTA'S NO LONGER

だから、子供たち、覚えておいてくれ、もし君がおかしかったら、サンタはもういないんだ。

WASTING TIME WITH LUMPS OF COAL.

炭の塊で時間を無駄にしている。

HE WILL CURB-STOMP YOUR LITTLE ASS.

HE WILL CURB-STOMP YOUR LITTLE ASS.

QUARANTINEWHILE, "FLORIDA'S FIRST SNOW PARK HAD TO UPDATE

QUARANTINEWHILE, "FLORIDA'S FIRST SNOW PARK HAD TO UPDATE

ITS OPERATING HOURS" BECAUSE THEY "DID NOT HAVE ENOUGH SNOW."

"雪が不足していたため" "営業時間を変更した"

I GOTTA SAY, BUILDING A SNOW PARK IN FLORIDA IS THE MOST

フロリダにスノーパークを 作るのが一番だと思います

FLORIDA THING ANYONE'S EVER DONE.

誰もがやったことのあるフロリダのことだ

HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?

どうしてこんなことになったの？

THE OPERATORS OF THE PARK SAY THEY GOT INTO THIS PICKLE

公園の管理人は、このピクルスの中に入ったと言っています。

BECAUSE THEY-- QUOTE-- "'MIS-ESTIMATED' SNOW

BECAUSE THEY-- QUOTE-- "'MIS-ESTIMATED' SNOW

PRODUCTION."

"PRODUCTION"

SO THEY MAY BE THE DUMBEST SNOW PARK OPERATORS EVER, BUT THEY

彼らは史上最低のスノーパーク運営者であるかもしれないが、しかし、彼らは

DID INSPIRE ONE OF THE HALLMARK CHANNEL'S 300 HOLIDAY MOVIES:

ホールマーク・チャンネルの300のホリデー・ムービーの一つに影響を与えました。

"A VERY MIS-ESTIMATED CHRISTMAS."

"非常に誤ったクリスマス"

STORY OF A BIG-CITY SNOW ENGINEER FINDS OUT IT'S NOT SO

大都市のスノーエンジニアがそうではないことを発見した物語

EASY TO RUN A SNOW PARK IN CENTRAL FLORIDA.

中央フロリダのスノーパークを簡単に走らせることができます。

BUT WHEN SHE MEETS A HANDSOME LOCAL MISTLETOE SALESMAN WITH A

しかし、彼女が出会ったのは、ハンサムな地元のミステリアスなセールスマンとの出会い。

DARK PAST, SHE REALIZES THE THING THAT SHE MIS-ESTIMATED

暗い過去、彼女は誤認していたことを現実にした

MOST WAS LOVE.

MOST WAS LOVE。

QUARANTINEWHILE, THE INTERNETS ARE AGOG OVER THE ANNOUNCEMENT

QUARANTINEWHILE, THE INTERNETS ARE AGOG OVER THE ANNOUNCEMENT

OF THIS BRAND-NEW "$550 MILLION MEGA-YACHT THAT LOOKS LIKE A

OF THIS BRAND-NEW "$550 MILLION MEGA-YACHT THAT LOOKS LIKE A

SHARK.

シャーク

THE MEGA-YACHT IS EQUIPPED WITH ITS OWN PORT WITH ENOUGH SPACE

メガヨットには十分なスペースを持つ専用ポートが装備されています。

FOR A SECOND YACHT."

"第二のヤクルトのために"

PLUS "SIX DECKS, THREE POOLS, AND THREE HELICOPTER

プラス「6つのデッキ、3つのプール、3つのヘリコプター

HANGARS."

HANGARS."

PERFECT FOR ANYONE SAYING, "I WANT A YACHT THAT JASON BOURNE

JASON BOURNEのヤクルトが欲しい」という方に最適です。

WOULD MURDER ME ON."

"私を殺してしまう"

IT LOOKS LIKE A YACHT ON TOP OF ANOTHER YACHT, LESS LIKE A

別のヤクルトの上にヤクルトが乗っているように見えて、ヤクルトには見えません。

SHARK, MORE LIKE TWO YACHTS STACKED.

SHARK, MORE LIKE TWO YACHTS STACKED.

QUARANTINEWHILE, "ASTRONOMERS HAVE CREATED A NEW 'ATLAS OF

QUARANTINEWHILE、「天文学者が新たな "アトラス "を創った

THE UNIVERSE' FEATURING A MILLION PREVIOUSLY UNDISCOVERED

THE UNIVERSE' FEATURING A MILLION PREVIOUSLY UNDISCOVERED

GALAXIES BEYOND THE MILKY WAY" "TO CREATE A 'GOOGLE MAPS' OF

ミルキーウェイの向こうの銀河」「グーグルマップを作るために

THE NIGHT SKY."

THE NIGHT SKY."

GREAT NEWS FOR SCIENCE.

GREAT NEWS FOR SCIENCE.

TERRIBLE NEWS FOR THE LITTLE GOOGLE STREET-VIEW GUY WHO WAS

TERRIBLE NEWS FOR THE LITTLE GOOGLE STREET-VIEW GUY WHO WAS

DROPPED NEAR ANDROMEDA AND NOW DRIFTS FOREVER ALONE, HIS

アンドロメダの近くに落ちて、今は永遠に一人で旅をしている、彼の...

SCREAMS SWALLOWED BY THE INDIFFERENT ICY VOID.

SCREAMS SWALLOWED BY THE INDIFFERENT ICY VOID.

BONUS: IT WILL EVEN GIVE YOU THE FASTEST BIKE ROUTE BETWEEN HERE

BONUS: IT WILL EVEN GIVE YOU THE FASTEST BIKE ROUTE BETWEEN HERE

AND NGC-1300.

そしてNGC-1300。

IT'S 3.5 TIMES 10 TO THE POWER OF 19 HOURS AWAY, BUT 3.5 TIMES

19時間後のパワーの3.5倍の10ですが、3.5倍です。

10 TO THE POWER OF 18 IF YOU AVOID THE TRIBOROUGH BRIDGE.

あなたがトライボローグ橋を回避する場合は、18のパワーに10。

QUARANTINEWHILE, THIS WEEKEND IN BRUSSELS, BELGIUM, A "LAWMAKER

今週末、ベルギーのブリュッセルで「ローメイカー」が開催されます。

AND DIPLOMATS FLED A POLICE RAID ON A COVID LOCKDOWN ORGY."

"ディプロマッツは警察の襲撃を コヴィドのロックダウン組織に放った"

PLEASE, IF YOU DO ATTEND A COVID LOCKDOWN ORGY, BE SURE TO WASH

COVIDロックダウン・オーガナイジングに参加した場合は、必ず洗ってください。

ALL YOUR ANONYMOUS SEX PARTNERS WHILE SINGING "HAPPY BIRTHDAY"

ALL YOUR ANONYMOUS SEX PARTNERS WHILE SINGING "HAPPY BIRTHDAY"

TWICE.

TWICE.

ODDS ARE THEY ARE INTO THAT.

ODDS ARE THEY ARE INTO THAT.

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH BRYAN CRANSTON.

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH BRYAN CRANSTON.

♪ ♪ ♪

♪ ♪ ♪