"LATE LATE SHOW."

"レイトレイトショー"

I HOPE -- I HOPE SO MUCH YOU HAD A HAPPY AND, DARE I SAY IT,

私は願っています...私はあなたが幸せで、あえてそれを言うならば、とても願っています。

PRODUCTIVE DAY.

"PRODUCTIVE DAY

THAT'S WHAT I HOPE.

そう願うよ

I'M SO HAPPY YOU'RE HERE BECAUSE TONIGHT WE'LL BE CHATTING WITH

I'M SO HAPPY YOU'RE HERE BECAUSE TONIGHT WE'LL BE CHATTING WITH

THE ALWAYS INCREDIBLE GOLDIE HAWN AND KURT RUSSELL.

THE ALWAYS INCREDIBLE GOLDIE HAWN AND KURT RUSSELL.

THEN LATER WE HAVE A PERFORMANCE FROM BTS.

その後、BTSからのパフォーマンスがあります。

STICK AROUND FOR IT, YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS IT.

周りに張り付いてくれ 見逃すなよ

( APPLAUSE ) BTS HAVE SENT IN A PERFORMANCE

( APPLAUSE ) BTSがパフォーマンスを披露してくれました。

WHICH IS, WITHOUT QUESTION, MY FAVORITE PERFORMANCE OF ANY SONG

WHICH IS, WITHOUT QUESTION, MY FAVORITE PERFORMANCE OF ANY SONG

WE'VE EVER HAD ON THIS SHOW, PERIOD.

これまでにもこのショーに出たことがあるわ

IT'S ELECTRIC, STICK AROUND FOR IT.

電気式だから、周りを見ててくれ

ALSO, GOLDIE HAWN, KURT RUSSELL, IS THERE A COOLER COUPLE?

また、ゴルディ・ホーン、カルト・ラスセル、クーラー・カップルはいるか？

>> Reggie: THAT'S THE "IT" COUPLE.

>> レジー：それが "IT "カップルだ。

>> James: IT IS.

>> ジェームズそうです。

I'D LIKE TO BE ADOPTED BY THEM.

私は彼らに養子にされたい。

IF THEY CAME TO ME AND SAID, I'VE HAD A LOVELY CHILDHOOD, I

IF THEY CAME TO ME AND SAID, I'VE HAD A LOVELY CHILDHOOD, I

LIKE MY PARENTS VERY, VERY MUCH, BUT IF THEY CAME TO ME AND SAID,

私の両親はとても、とても、とても好きだけど、でも、もし彼らが私のところに来て言ったならば、

WE WOULD LIKE TO TAKE YOU UNDER OUR WING, I'D DO IT.

WE WOULD LIKE TO TAKE YOU UNDER OUR WING, I'D DO IT.

I'D JUST IMAGINE THE THREE OF US, I IMAGINE KURT WILL TEACH ME

I'D JUST IMAGINE THE THREE OF US, I IMAGINE KURT WILL TEACH ME

OUTSIDE HOW TO CHOP WOOD AND -- ( LAUGHTER )

外で木を切る方法と...(笑)

DO YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

DO YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

ALL THE STUFF MY DAD COULDN'T TEACH ME.

ALL THE STUFF MY DAD COULDN'T TEACH ME.

MY DAD TAUGHT ME TO HARMONIZE, THAT'S IT.

親父が教えてくれたんだ

AND THAT'S BEEN USEFUL, BUT NOW I NEED TO KNOW HOW TO CHOP SOME

役に立ったけど、今は切り方を知らないといけない。

WOOD, YOU KNOW.

WOOD, YOU KNOW.

>> HE'D SHOW YOU HOW TO WEAR A THICK WOOL SWEATER.

>> HE'D SHOW YOU HOW TO WEAR A THICK WOOL SWEATER.

>> YES, A BIG SWEATER, DENIM JEANS, CHUNKY BOOTS, AND WE

>> そう、ビッグスウェットにデニムジーンズ、チャンキーブーツ、そしてWE。

WOULD JUST BE OUT THERE AND HE WOULD BE GOING, NO, SON, YOUR

ただそこにいただけで、彼は行ってしまう、いや、息子よ、あなたの

HANDS ARE IN THE WRONG PLACE.

HANDS ARE IN THE WRONG PLACE.

AND I WOULD BE, SORRY, DAD.

そして、私は、申し訳ありませんが、お父さんになるだろう。

AND GOLDIE WOULD COME OUT WITH A HOT CHOCOLATE, MARSHMALLOWS, AND

ホットチョコレートとマシュマロを持って出てきて

THEY'D MAKE A JOKE ABOUT HIS HAS WHISKEY IN IT, AND I WOULD GO,

ウイスキーが入ってるってジョークを言うのよ 私は行くわ

OH, GOD, YOU KNOW -- >> YOU KNOW WHAT, I THINK YOU'RE

OH, GOD, YOU KNOW -- >> YOU KNOW WHAT, I THINK YOU'RE

A VERY TALENTED GUY.

非常に才能のある男だ

DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE NOT GREAT AT?

DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU'RE NOT GREAT AT?

SQUINTING INTO A SUNSET.

日没に向かってスクインティング。

>> James: RIGHT.

>> ジェームス右。

KURT RUSSELL, WITHIN TWO DAYS YOU WOULD BE A MASTER AT IT.

KURT RUSSELL, WITHIN TWO DAYS YOU WOULD BE A MASTER AT IT.

>> James: I LOOK LIKE I'M TRYING TO READ SOMETHING I CAN'T

>> ジェームズ何かを読もうとしているように見えるが、読めない。

QUITE MAKE OUT.

QUITE MAKE OUT。

WHAT GUILLERMO?

何ギレルモ？

>> I SAID YOU LOOK CONSTIPATED.

>> I SAID YOU LOOK CONSTIPATED.

( LAUGHTER ) >> James: GUYS, IF IT'S OKAY

( LAUGHTER ) >> James.GUYS, IF IT'S OKAY

WITH YOU, I WOULDN'T MIND HAVING A LOOK AT THE DAY'S HEADLINES.

WITH YOU, I WOULDN'T MIND HAVING A LOOK AT THE DAY'S HEADLINES.

I KNOW IT'S ODD FOR US TO KICK A SHOW OFF IN SUCH A WAY BUT IS

こんな風にショーオフをキックするのは 難しいと分かっていますが

THAT COOL FOR EVERYONE?

THAT COOL FOR EVERYONE?

LET'S DO IT.

LET'S DO IT.

BECAUSE BIG NEWS, LAST NIGHT, AFTER WEEKS OF

BECAUSE BIG NEWS, LAST NIGHT, AFTER WEEKS OF

DELAY, PRESIDENT TRUMP FINALLY ASKED THE GSA TO BEGIN THE

DELAY, PRESIDENT TRUMP FINALLY ASKED THE GSA TO BEGIN THE

TRANSITION OF POWER TO PRESIDENT-ELECT JOE BIDEN.

大統領エレクト・ジョー・バイデンへの権限移譲

THERE IT IS, BANG!

あったぞ！バン！

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) I SWEAR, THIS IS LIKE THE FIFTH

( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) I SWEAR, THIS IS LIKE THE FIFTH

OR SIXTH TIME JOE BIDEN HAS WON THE ELECTION.

OR SIXTH TIME JOE BIDEN HAS WON THE ELECTION.

ISN'T IT IN WE'VE HONESTLY DONE THIS FIVE TIMES NOW, BUT THIS IS

ISN'T IT IN WE'VE HONESTLY DONE THIS FIVE TIMES NOW, BUT THIS IS

GOOD NEWS, IT IS, OF COURSE, BUT THAT'S HOW LOW THE BAR IS!

良いニュースだ もちろんだが、それはバーがどれだけ低いかということだ！

TRUMP'S DOING THE BARE MINIMUM, WEEKS LATE, AND ACTING LIKE A

トランプは最低限度のことをしていて、数週間遅れで、そのように行動しています。

TOTAL DICK ABOUT IT.

凄く気合いが入っている

AND I'M LIKE, "LOOK AT THAT.

私は「あれを見て」と言っていました。

LEADERSHIP PERSONIFIED."

LEADERSHIP PERSONIFIED"

SEE, WHERE WAS THAT LEADERSHIP THE LAST FOUR YEARS?

SEE, WHERE WAS THAT LEADERSHIP THE LAST FOUR YEARS?

HE'S DONE NOTHING.

彼は何もしていない

ALSO, I LOVE THAT WE'RE ALL TALKING ABOUT THE G.S.A. AS IF

ALSO, I LOVE WE'RE ALL TALKING ABOUT THE G. S. A.

IT'S A THING THAT ANYONE KNEW ABOUT BEFORE YESTERDAY.

それは、誰もが知っていることです。

( LAUGHTER ) THE G.S.A. IS A COMPLETE

( LAUGHTER ) G. S. A. A. は完全に

TRANSITION OF POWER -- DON'T BE JUST A HUMAN RETWEET.

TRANSITION OF POWER -- DON'T BE JUST A HUMAN RETWEET.

ADMIT YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS!

それが何か知らないと認めろ！

( LAUGHTER ) FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T KNOW,

( LAUGHTER ) 知らない人のために。

G.S.A. STANDS FOR GENERAL SERVICES ADMINISTRATION, WHICH

G.S.A.とは、GENERAL SERVICES ADMINISTRATIONの略。

SOUNDS LIKE A FAKE COMPANY YOU'D USE TO PAD YOUR RESUME.

あなたの履歴書を埋めるのに使う偽物の会社のように聞こえる。

"WHAT KIND OF WORK DID YOU DO?" "OH, YOU KNOW, MOSTLY GENERAL

"WHAT KIND OF WORK DID YOU DO?" "OH, YOU KNOW, MOSTLY GENERAL

SERVICES.

SERVICES.

AND THE ADMINISTRATING THEREOF."

"そしてその管理をすること"

( LAUGHTER ) DESPITE ALL OF THIS, TRUMP IS

( LAUGHTER ) DESPITE ALL OF THIS, TRUMP IS

STILL NOT CONCEDING THE ELECTION, AND ACCORDING TO

まだ選挙に同意していない、とに従っている。

REPORTS, TRUMP AGREED TO BIDEN'S TRANSITION ONLY AFTER BEING TOLD

REPORTS, TRUMP AGREED TO BIDEN'S TRANSITION ONLY AFTER BEING TOLD

BY ADVISORS THAT HE DIDN'T HAVE TO ADMIT DEFEAT.

BY ADVISORS THAT HE DIDN'T HAVE TO ADMIT DEFEAT.

WHICH RAISES AN IMPORTANT PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTION: IF YOU

WHICH RAISES AN IMPORTANT PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTION: IF YOU

NEVER CONCEDE, DID YOU REALLY LOSE?

NEVER CONCEDE, DID YOU LOSE REALLY LOSE?

AND THE ANSWER IS YES.

そして答えはイエスです。

( LAUGHTER ) TRUMP'S LIKE THE CHESS MASTER.

( LAUGHTER ) TRUMP'S LIKE THE CHESS MASTER.

LIKE E'S BEING BADLY BEATEN, SO JUST SUGGEST A DRAW.

Eがひどい目に遭っているのが好きだから 絵を描いてくれないか？

I DON'T KNOW IF THAT ANALOGY WORKS.

私は、そのアナログが機能するかどうか分からない。

I'M EATING IT UP, THE QUEEN'S GAMBIT, ARE YOU?

I'M EATING IT UP, THE QUEEN'S GAMBIT, ARE YOU?

>> I DEVOURED IT.

>> 私はそれを捧げました。

I'LL TELL YOU AT THE END, QUEEN GAMBITS ALL OVER THE PLACE.

I'LL TELL YOU AT THE END, QUEEN GAMBITS ALL OVER THE PLACE.

( LAUGHTER ) >> James: AND TRUMP ISN'T

( LAUGHTER ) >> James.AND TRUMP ISNN'T

GIVING UP AND THE BASELESS CLAIMS OF AN ELECTION

選挙の根拠のない主張を放棄して

CONSPIRACY.

陰謀だ

HE RETWEETED ELECTRIC "THE WAPOST-S ANDTHIS IS TRUE, THE

彼はリツイートで「ワポストとこれが真実だ」と

ECCENTRIC ACTOR RANDY QUAID.

ECCENTRIC ACTOR RANDY QUAID。

FIVE RANDY QUAID RETWEETS!

RANDY QUAIDのリツイートを5つ紹介!

TWO, SURE.

TWO, SURE.

THREE... THAT'S PUSHING IT.

３...それは無理だ

BUT FIVE, I THINK THAT MAKES HIM SECRETARY OF AGRICULTURE.

でも５、私はそれが彼を農業の長官にしたと思ってる

( LAUGHTER ) YOU MIGHT REMEMBER RANDY QUAID

( LAUGHTER ) YOU MIGHT REMEMBER RANDY QUAID

AS THE NUTTY COUSIN EDDIE FROM CHRISTMAS VACATION.

クリスマスのバカンスからの おかしな従兄弟のように

OR AS THE NUTTY FIGHTER PILOT FROM INDEPENDENCE DAY.

OR AS THE NUTTY FIGHTER PILOT FROM INDEPENDENCE DAY.

OR AS THE NUTTY CRIMINAL FUGITIVE FROM REAL LIFE.

現実の生活からの 厄介な犯罪者の逃亡者として

( LAUGHTER ) IN THE FINAL POST THAT THE

( LAUGHTER ) IN THE FINAL POST THAT THE

PRESIDENT RETWEETED, RANDY QUAID DID A DRAMATIC RETWEETING OF A

PRESIDENT RETWEETED, RANDY QUAIDがドラマチックなリツイートをしました。

TRUMP TWEET ATTACKING FOX NEWS.

FOXニュースを攻撃するTRUMPのツイッター。

HAVE A LOOK.

HAVE A LOOK.

>> YOU FORGOT THE GOLDEN GOOSE!

>> YOU FORGOT THE GOLDEN GOOSE!

(LAUGHING) THE ONLY DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE 2016 ELECTION AND

（笑）2016年の選挙の間の唯一の違いと

2020 IS FOX NEWS!

2020年はFOXニュース!

>> James: GUYS, I THINK SAN A AT THAT IS STRUGGLING WITH

>> ジェームズ: GUYS, I THINK SAN A AT THAT IS STRUGGING WITH WITH.

QUARANTINE.

QUARANTINE.

IF I WERE RANDY QUAID, I WOULD NEVER MAKE A VIDEO OF MYSELF

もし俺がランディ・クエイドだったら、自分のビデオは絶対に撮らない。

THAT CLOSE UP KNOWING FULL WELL MY NOSE LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE A

そのクローズアップはよく知っているが、私の鼻はまさに...

PENIS.

ペニス

( LAUGHTER ) AND ELON MUSK, PAST BILL GATES,

( LAUGHTER ) と エロン・マスク、前ビル・ゲイツ。

IS THE SECOND RICHEST MAN IN THE WORLD WITH A TOTAL NET WORTH OF

世界で2番目に裕福な男で、純資産総額は1億円です。

OVER $127 BILLION.

１２７ビリオンを超える

OUR THOUGHTS GO OUT TO THE GATES' FAMILY AT THIS DIFFICULT

OUR THOUGHTS GO OUT TO THE GATES' FAMILY AT THIS DIFFICULT

TIME.

時間だ

MUSK IS NOW THE SECOND RICHEST MAN IN THE WORLD.

MUSKは世界で2番目にリッチな男になりました。

HOWEVER, HE IS STILL THE NUMBER ONE "RICHEST MAN IN THE WORLD

しかし、彼は今でも「世界で最も裕福な男」のナンバーワンであることに変わりはありません。

THAT LOOKS LIKE HE SINGS IN A WEDDING BAND."

"結婚式のバンドで歌ってるように見える"

WE DO A LITTLE BIT OF EVERYTHING.

私たちは何でも少しずつやっています。

WE DO UP TOWN FUNK, AND THEN UP SIDE YOUR HEAD AND THEN

俺たちは町中でファンクをして、次に頭を横にして、それから

SOMETIMES I DO A LITTLE RAPPING IF THE BRIDE AND GROOM LIKE IT.

新郎新婦が気に入れば 少しのラッピングをすることもある

WHAT WOULD YOU EVEN DO WITH $127 BILLION?

WHAT WOULD YOU EVEN DO WITH $127 BILLION?

REG,ER WHAT WOULD YOU DO?

REG,ER WHAT WOULD YOU DO?

>> Reggie: I'D PAY OFF ALL STUDENT DEBT.

>> レジー：学生の借金を全部返す。

>> James: THERE IT IS.

>> ジェームズそこにある

( APPLAUSE ) WELL, THAT MADE US ALL FEEL BAD.

( APPLAUSE) Well, THAT MADE US ALL FEEL BAD.

CAN'T FOLLOW THAT.

付いて行けない

NOWHERE FOR THAT TO GO.

どこにも行かない

>> I WAS GOING TO SAY I'D GET A BOAT.

>> 船に乗ると言おうと思ってたのに

( LAUGHTER ) >> James: I'D GET A BOAT AND

(笑) >> ジェームズ.I'D GET A BOAT AND

I'D LET STUDENTS USE IT TWICE A YEAR.

I'D LET STUDENTS USE IT TWICE A YEAR.

( APPLAUSE ) ON ME.

( APPLAUSE ) ON ME.

GO NUTS, GUYS.

GO NUTS、GUYS。

YOU STILL HAVE TO PAY FOR THE FUEL.

燃料代を払わなければならない

( LAUGHTER ) AND FINALLY, WE WANTED TO TELL

( LAUGHTER ) そして最後に 伝えたいことがありました

YOU ABOUT THIS, THERE'S A NEW DATING APP

新しい出会い系アプリが登場しました。

EXCLUSIVELY FOR BALD PEOPLE.

禿げた人々のために排他的に。

IT'S CALLED "BALD DATING" AND IT AIMS TO HELP THOSE WHO

それは "BALD DATING "と呼ばれていて、それは誰が助けることを目的としています。

ARE BALD OR HAVE THINNING HAIR FIND PARTNERS WHO, "PREFER IT

ARE BALD OR HAVE THINNING HAIR FIND PARTNERS WHO, "PREFER IT

THAT WAY."

"その道で"

YEAH.

ああ

A DATING APP FOR BALD PEOPLE.

禿げた人のための出会いアプリ。

WHICH WAS DISAPPOINTING NEWS FOR THAT ONE GUY WHO THOUGHT HE WAS

WHICH WAS DISAPPOINTING NEWS FOR THAT ONE GUY WHO THOUGHT HE WAS

FINALLY ABOUT TO HAVE SEX WITH A BALD EAGLE.

FINALLY ABOUT TO HAVE SEX WITH A BALD EAGLE.

( LAUGHTER ) I REALLY FEEL EVENTUALLY WE'LL

( LAUGHTER ) I REALLY FEELUALLY WELL.

GET TO THE POINT WHERE EVERY INDIVIDUAL MAN HAS HIS OWN APP.

GET TO THE POINT WHERE EVERY INDIVIDUAL MAN HAS HIS OWN APP.

HI, I'M MARK, IF YOU WANT TO DATE MARK, JOIN MARK FINDER.

ハイ、私はマークよ マークとデートしたいなら マークファインダーに参加して

( LAUGHTER ) THE APP IS SIMPLY CALLED "BALD

( LAUGHTER ) THE APP IS SIMPLY CALLED "BALD

DATING," WHICH IS BETTER THAN SOME OF

"DATING "は、そのうちのいくつかよりも優れています。

THEIR ORIGINAL NAME IDEAS.

彼らのオリジナルの名前のアイデア。

LIKE THIS ONE: "SKINDER."

これがいい"スキンダー"

OR THIS ONE: "CLOSE SHAVE CUPID."

OR THIS ONE: "CLOSE SHAVE CUPID"

AND FINALLY, THIS ONE: "E-NO-HAIR-MONY."

そして最後にこれは "E-NO-HAIR-MONY"