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  • - Okay, I don't look tan.

  • Hi, I'm Iliza Shlesinger, a comedian,

  • and today we're going to be doing an experiment

  • in Zoom.

  • There we are!

  • So we're gonna have a bunch of people

  • who are waiting in a Zoom waiting room.

  • I don't know who these people are.

  • I haven't seen them.

  • They don't know that I'm here.

  • But these people are gonna come in with their acts,

  • their material, whatever they've cobbled together,

  • and they're gonna perform it for me and you,

  • here in Zoom.

  • They have 20 seconds, and I'll tell you why they're funny

  • or why they're not funny, and hopefully,

  • you guys are gonna learn some things about comedy

  • along the way.

  • All right, let's do this.

  • [energetic drumbeat]

  • - All right, Gianmarco, you can go into the main room.

  • First person's coming in Iliza.

  • - All right.

  • [chime]

  • - Well, hello, oh!

  • - It's starting!

  • - Hi!

  • I'm Italian, and we do a lot of hugging,

  • we kiss each other goodbye, we used to at least.

  • And my roommate who is not Italian,

  • when he first saw my dad and I kiss, he was just like,

  • "Ew, do you kiss your dad in public?"

  • And I was like, "Yeah, you know what would be weird?

  • "If I only kissed him in private."

  • [Iliza laughs]

  • - Good!

  • [chime]

  • - He had a good premise.

  • - I'm Italian, we do a lot of hugging,

  • we kiss each other goodbye.

  • - He had a good set up.

  • - Do you kiss your dad in public?

  • - And he had good timing,

  • so I was waiting for that punchline.

  • - And I was like, yeah, you know what would be weird?

  • If I only kissed him in private.

  • - Plus the second he said he's Italian, I was like

  • this could either be really hacky,

  • or it's one I hadn't heard before.

  • All right, next one.

  • [chime]

  • All right, hit that clock!

  • - Hey, I just want people to be better at racism.

  • That's pretty much all I want.

  • If you're gonna be racist to me,

  • don't just call me a terrorist, that's very lazy.

  • I'd be a terrible terrorist.

  • I can't keep a secret.

  • That's a really [beep]ing important part of terrorism.

  • You got a couple drinks in me,

  • I'll tell you anything you wanna know.

  • If I was a terrorist,

  • I would've screwed everything up September 8th.

  • I would've ruined the whole thing.

  • - It was too much set up.

  • - If you're gonna be racist to me,

  • don't just call me a terrorist, that's very lazy.

  • I'd be a terrible terrorist.

  • - If you say to me from the beginning, like,

  • "If you're gonna be racist, don't be lazy about it"

  • Then I'm dying to hear, I'm like,

  • how are white people lazy about it?

  • But, he didn't stay in the pocket.

  • He set up all of these things.

  • And then the payoff was like a pff.

  • - If I was a terrorist,

  • I would've screwed everything up September 8th.

  • - Like barely at the end.

  • Look, this isn't easy.

  • Having a timer in your face, ticking down,

  • is not normal and it adds pressure and it adds stress.

  • But that is a huge part of being a stand-up comic,

  • and that's why we've put it here.

  • [chime] Hello there.

  • - Hi!

  • - Hi.

  • You have 20 seconds to impress me.

  • - So originally I submitted a video

  • talking about how I've been low key thriving

  • throughout the quarantine,

  • but then yesterday my internet went out for 20 minutes

  • and I literally thought the world was ending,

  • but then when it didn't,

  • I immediately tried to buy crochet needles online,

  • but then I couldn't,

  • because my bank account was in the negative,

  • so instead I just gave myself bangs and I started crying.

  • [Iliza laughs]

  • - That's funny, that's funny!

  • A big part of comedy is seeing something

  • that's bright and shiny and awesome,

  • and then watching it unravel.

  • Whether it's Chris Farley as Matt Foley starting off okay

  • and then smashing into a coffee table,

  • or somebody starting off great like in Trading Places,

  • and then descending into being a total homeless mess.

  • For her, she started with--

  • - I've been low key thriving throughout the quarantine.

  • - Which was a lie,

  • and then we watched one bad thing beget the next.

  • - But then yesterday, my internet went out for 20 minutes.

  • - And then we wanted to see, how's our character,

  • how's our hero gonna get herself out of it?

  • - So instead I just gave myself bangs and I started crying.

  • - What isn't funny is her redeeming herself, and being like,

  • "And in the end, I made a million dollars"

  • What is funny is seeing how she makes it even worse

  • by being like "And then I cut my own bangs,"

  • which is crazy, but relatable,

  • because every girl has done it.

  • [chime]

  • - Someone just told me to go back to where I come from,

  • which is very weird, because I'm just white and gay,

  • which means that this guy thinks there's a country

  • where gay people come from, which means,

  • he knows about Canada.

  • - That's funny.

  • It's been done before, the go back to where you come from,

  • and then they say "Why, that's an insane thing

  • to say to a person."

  • So we're taking racism and turning it on its ear.

  • - Which is very weird, because I'm just white and gay.

  • - The Canada is gay joke has been around forever,

  • so for me, what worked was the delivery.

  • - Which means he knows about Canada.

  • - A big part of comedy is saying things

  • that have been said before, but in a new way.

  • So while it wasn't the most revelatory joke,

  • he had a fun delivery.

  • And funny is funny.

  • [energetic drumbeat]

  • - Hey everybody it's your man Steve Harvey.

  • - Steve Harvey!

  • - Now even though we are quarantined right now,

  • you gotta look fly.

  • And that's why I had my wife put an extra button

  • on my suit here, so I look extra fly for the--

  • Aw damn.

  • Y'all can see I ain't wearing no damn pants.

  • Goddamn it,

  • where the hell's the button to turn this shit off?

  • - The key to what made that funny was simplicity.

  • We've all seen Steve Harvey impressions.

  • Kenan does them on SNL really well.

  • This guy, the second I saw him, I saw the thick mustache,

  • and the bald head, and the suit, I was like,

  • that's Steve Harvey, the m%ustache lets you know that,

  • and it was simple.

  • - Hey everybody it's your man Steve Harvey.

  • - [Iliza] We all know Steve Harvey

  • wears a lot of buttons on his suits.

  • - That's why I had my wife put an extra button

  • on my suit here.

  • - [Iliza] And to be honest,

  • I was so distracted by the buttons,

  • I didn't even realize he wasn't wearing pants.

  • - Aw damn.

  • Y'all can see I ain't wearing no damn pants.

  • - So that was a nice little tag at the end.

  • It's simple, it's easy, he nailed it, and that was that.

  • It's math.

  • Okay, what's next.

  • [chime]

  • [Bert moans]

  • [increasingly frenzied squealing]

  • - Oh Kermie, that was beautiful, mmm, ahaha!

  • [high-pitched laughter]

  • [crash]

  • [Iliza laughs]

  • - Um, costumes are a tricky thing,

  • because there's always the uncanny valley.

  • There's really two ways you can go.

  • You can either nail it and look just like the character.

  • Drag queens are a great example,

  • whether you're Derrick Barry doing Britney Spears,

  • or any drag queen doing Cher, or whoever they impersonate.

  • The other version is kinda what this guy did

  • where you look nothing like the character.

  • He was a dude in a beard with like a cheap plastic wig

  • and odd-looking pig ears.

  • It gave him even a wider berth to do something weird.

  • [Bert squealing]

  • If it was actually Miss Piggy doing it,

  • that might just be so uncomfortable

  • nobody wanted to watch it.

  • [high-pitched laughter]

  • [crash]

  • Falling off camera though, is always funny.

  • [chime]

  • - This is my mom on every vacation.

  • That's pretty.

  • Oh that's pretty, hon isn't that pretty?

  • Oh is that a church, that's pretty!

  • Why didn't you tell me you were gay sooner?

  • [chime]

  • - Everybody loves to make fun of their parents.

  • Everybody likes to watch people making fun of their parents.

  • He moved the hair to the side, he's like,

  • "This is my mom on every vacation."

  • I was like, great, we're gonna get some insight,

  • maybe the mom has a fun accent,

  • or she's got this quirky personality,

  • and instead, the mom just sounded like a drag queen

  • who smokes too many cigarettes.

  • - That's pretty.

  • - This one was all about expectation versus delivery.

  • By the way, a real act takes time.

  • You've gotta craft it, it's still an art form,

  • it's something you need to work at.

  • So these people are coming in raw with just the basics.

  • I guarantee the next time they tell this joke,

  • it'll be just that much better.

  • And that's how you build an act.

  • - 20 seconds on the clock, please impress me.

  • - Of course.

  • [landline ringing]

  • Can I go?

  • So this is my impersonation of, this is my impression

  • of a parrot taking a bath.

  • [landline ringing]

  • - What was that part?

  • - The body's in the fridge!

  • - What?

  • - The body's in the fridge!

  • The body's in the fridge!

  • - The body's in the fridge is a hilarious punchline.

  • It's a total misdirect

  • because we didn't expect the parrot to say that.

  • That being said, if you're gonna set up--

  • - This is my impression of a parrot taking a bath.

  • - I was so excited to see a great parrot impression.

  • That would've meant more to me than the punchline.

  • A great animal impression is always a hit at parties.

  • Unfortunately he lost me because it just looked like

  • he had lost control of his neck.

  • To me the funniest part of the whole bit

  • is that he had a landline that was going nuts.

  • Like, who gets that many calls on a landline?

  • [chime]

  • - All right.

  • Okay, I'm gonna do a couple impressions.

  • This is an Australian person

  • who's really into conspiracy theories.

  • 9/11 was an inside job.

  • Okay, so that's that one.

  • Um, here's another one.

  • Brene Brown is my favorite comedian.

  • That's me failing to connect with my peers

  • due to a fundamental misunderstanding of what a comedian is.

  • - Whoa!

  • Shots fired!

  • The tricky thing with name checking

  • someone who isn't Beyonce or the president

  • is that you run the risk of not everyone in the room

  • knowing who that person is.

  • - Brene Brown is my favorite comedian.

  • - And then, to take it even further,

  • you shouldn't have to have firsthand knowledge

  • of what the comic is talking about

  • for them to make it relatable.

  • Women talk about being women and men still find it funny,

  • and vice versa, because the material itself is very funny.

  • A trick to being a comic

  • is conveying the connections in your mind

  • that lead to funny thoughts perfectly to your audience,

  • so they can come on that journey with you.

  • [energetic drumbeat]

  • - You'd think guys online dating

  • would make more of an effort

  • because you only get one chance

  • to make a good first impression.

  • Here are actual messages I received within two weeks.

  • [Iliza chuckles]

  • - Is it all from the same person?

  • - No!

  • [both laugh]

  • - Even if you've never really done online dating,

  • as I haven't, I still have seen people deal with those.

  • And it's enough in the zeitgeist

  • that you know how painful that is.

  • I'd never seen someone print out the messages

  • and hold them up, but as she was doing it, I could see,

  • I've gotten DMs that are like that, like "Hello miss."

  • As she was doing it I started getting angry for her,

  • I'm like, "What do these guys think they're doing?"

  • So I laughed at her because I felt her pain,

  • and comedy is pain.

  • [chime]

  • - All right, my name's Nate Dicken,

  • and this is beer roulette instead of comedy roulette.

  • I'm gonna close my eyes, tell me when to stop.

  • - Stop.

  • - Ugh!

  • It was the pee again, wasn't it?

  • It was the--damn it!

  • I drank the pee again.

  • That's the fifth time this week I drank the pee.

  • - Sorry you drank the pee.

  • It's perennially funny, the sort of sad, frat boy,

  • willing to do anything.

  • The problem with that gag is that it's a bit of a sight gag

  • in that one of those is labeled "PEE,"

  • but I was so focused, to his credit,

  • on him and what he was doing,

  • I thought all of those said beer.

  • - Ugh!

  • It was the pee again, wasn't it?

  • - Then I had to stop watching him,

  • which you never want, because you're not a magician,

  • I don't want to look at your hands, I wanna look at you,

  • And I had to read that it actually said pee.

  • - I drank the pee again.

  • That's the fifth time this week I drank the pee.

  • - You never want to give the audience a reason

  • to stop focusing on you.

  • - Damn it!

  • - You go watch Carrot Top,

  • you see the whole thing is about what he's saying,

  • and the props.

  • You never have to watch Carrot Top explain anything.

  • The props tell the joke.

  • But drinking pee is funny, if it's actually pee.

  • [chime] Hi!

  • - Smurf meat is the veal of the mythical world.

  • Marinate it in its own blood and tears.

  • Don't throw out the bones!

  • They can be ground and fried into tortillas!

  • I plucked smurf public hair for this quill!

  • Don't be afraid to really milk those sebaceous glands

  • for perfume oil.

  • - The good thing about this was his props were specific.

  • He had his premise, he was like, "We've murdered a smurf,

  • "and here is how we will break down the body."

  • Like the Native Americans, he's going to use every part.

  • So, morbid as it is, it at least was on brand.

  • One of the things you have to keep in mind

  • when doing comedy, and this doesn't come for a couple years,

  • but in the back of your mind is,

  • why are you telling this joke?

  • That's why people tell jokes about their parents

  • coming from other countries, or your home life,

  • or personal things about dating,

  • because these are things that make you unique

  • that you wanna put out there.

  • Or, is it simply that you want to be seen on a stage?

  • And if so, you've gotta dig a little bit deeper.

  • We all wanna be seen, the question is,

  • why should people be watching us?

  • [chime] Hi there.

  • 20 seconds to impress me, also, you are sideways.

  • [Doris laughs]

  • - Okay.

  • At the end of quarantine,

  • I decided to go to a movie theater,

  • because there was nobody there.

  • So when I saw some jackwad

  • decide to sit right in front of me,

  • I said, oh, I'm gonna give him a big old popcorn explosion.

  • Oh, oh, wait, I'm exploding everywhere!

  • And he left.

  • - I am the queen of fast delivery.

  • I am the queen of looking just frantic on stage.

  • I like to think I've been doing it long enough

  • that it's become just my vibe and my product.

  • One of the things that you don't wanna do in comedy

  • is seem uncomfortable,

  • and it was so frantic and the delivery was so fast,

  • all I remember was the popcorn going everywhere.

  • - I'm exploding everywhere!

  • - And if you're gonna have popcorn go everywhere,

  • commit to it.

  • Like, the walls of the room should come down.

  • It should be that the popcorn is hot.

  • There's something to be said for creating the expectation

  • that what's about to happen

  • is gonna be outlandish and crazy.

  • If you deliver anything just short of that,

  • your audience will always be disappointed.

  • [energetic drumbeat]

  • - What is Alanis Morissette's favorite jelly?

  • A traffic jam when she's already late!

  • I'm gonna open up a store that only sells irons

  • and I'm gonna call it, Isn't It Ironic.

  • And I'm gonna open up another store and call that one

  • A Little Two Ironic.

  • Yeah, I really do think.

  • [chime]

  • - The second he brought up the premise of Alanis Morissette,

  • my mind just turned off.

  • Now if you go far enough back in time, like,

  • "You know what the problem with the plague was?"

  • Maybe I might tune in.

  • To me the funniest part was the like,

  • "Yeah, I do" at the end.

  • - Yeah, I really do think.

  • - That was the only part where I saw any of his personality.

  • The most important thing in comedy

  • is to fail and keep going,

  • because you know you have something to say.

  • If you think it's uncomfortable

  • to bomb in front of one person,

  • try actually doing this in the real world.

  • If we ever get to leave our houses again.

  • [chime]

  • - Iliza!

  • - Yeah!

  • - Congrats on all your success, you know,

  • the Netflix show, specials, and now you're doing Zoom calls

  • with a guy whose biggest credit is this Zoom call.

  • What do you have tomorrow?

  • A homeless telephone?

  • - Where are they gonna get the phones?

  • - No idea.

  • - So what I loved about this is that he made fun of me.

  • Comics love that.

  • We love ball-breaking from the highest light.

  • If you look at any of the Dean Martin roasts,

  • or Don Rickles.

  • The problem was, A, he asked me, his audience, to engage,

  • and I wasn't sure if it was rhetorical or not,

  • so I felt like I stepped on him.

  • - Iliza!

  • - Yeah! - Congrats

  • on all your success!

  • - And B, my heckle back was just as good as his joke to me.

  • Which is fine if you're in a roasting environment,

  • but I'm in the audience.

  • If you're gonna insult someone,

  • you don't want there to be a comeback.

  • [chime]

  • - America, what is wrong?

  • I was watching T.V. the other day in my mansion.

  • I am a dictator.

  • And there was an ad.

  • It said for $1 a day, I can sponsor a quarantined American.

  • [Tatenda laughs]

  • Africa is the first world now, bitch.

  • [Tatenda chuckles]

  • - You never wanna bring up something sad.

  • This is why Holocaust punchlines are never funny.

  • This is why spousal abuse punchlines, abortion punchlines,

  • the joke's gotta be fire

  • for people to laugh so much that they're removed

  • from the fact that they're thinking

  • about something sad and personal.

  • That was a very long set up

  • for a very short punchline at the end,

  • which would be great if the set up were fun.

  • If the joke leaves you thinking about the premise and set up

  • more than the punchline, it's not a successful joke.

  • [chime]

  • [Linzy screaming maniacally]

  • [garbled noises]

  • - Oh, my god, I don't know how to work this, sorry,

  • that's my 7th grade photo when I was a blond,

  • oh no that's me eating trash pasta out of the subway,

  • I don't know how to use Zoom I'm sorry.

  • = Sometimes when you're too frantic,

  • and I've made a living off of being frantic on stage,

  • while it was weird, that is not so funny.

  • The good news is some of these people want to be funny,

  • and you can see the want in their eyes.

  • Desperation is a key characteristic in being a comedian, so,

  • they're partially there.

  • So that was a really cool experiment,

  • and the fascinating and the best part about comedy

  • is that it is 100% subjective.

  • So just because I wasn't laughing, I don't know,

  • maybe some of you were laughing,

  • and maybe the things I laughed at, you guys thought,

  • "Eh, not so funny."

  • The truth is though, there's no right or wrong answer.

  • That's why there's so many comedians

  • and so many types of comedy.

  • So I give a big round of applause to all the people,

  • all the comedians, I dub you comedians,

  • that showed up today and tried to make us laugh.

  • Because at the end of the day,

  • you're still watching this, which means it was entertaining,

  • which means it was successful.

  • [clicks tongue]

  • [chill music]

- Okay, I don't look tan.

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17人が20秒でコメディアンを笑わせようとしている (Ft. Iliza Shlesinger) |Vanity Fair (17 People Try to Make a Comedian Laugh in 20 Seconds (Ft. Iliza Shlesinger) | Vanity Fair)

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    林宜悉 に公開 2021 年 01 月 14 日
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